A Slow Process
by aoi koneko chan
Summary: In the heat of the moment there's no room for regret. You say words you don't mean. You wish things you never truly feel. But when it's all taken away from you, what's left but heartache? How much can you hurt and grieve before life throws you a second chance? And it's yours...you only have to grab it. Zoro's spent four years regretting and he hopes Sanji can forgive him.
1. Chapter One

CHAPTER ONE

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

"It's always like this you bloody selfish bastard!" The shout rattled around the room as the front door slammed. Sadly, it had been abused many a time throughout the last couple of weeks and it had honestly seen worse.

"Selfish? Me? Check in the mirror, curly!" He screamed as he brushed by the blond into their room and proceeded to slam that door shut only for it to be opened a second later by an angry blond.

"What the fuck does that mean?" The blond asked icily apparently deciding to ignore the door to the face.

"Oh, for heaven's sake! You bitch and moan at me about going to all your stupid social events, never mind that I fuckin hate the hell out of it all especially the ones in fucking French! Fuck. You drag me along and leave me there like a wallflower just to show that you're not alone."

"I fucking leave you alone because you complain like a sod every time I _do_ talk with you at those parties. ' _Leave me alone, cook. I don't need your babysitting.'_ It's always something like that." The blond spat as the green haired man seethed.

"Well I fucking don't!" Zoro spat back and wheeled to turn around on the blond. "And don't change the topic. This is about _your_ selfish decisions here, don't go turning it around on me."

"Who the fuck was turning anything around!?" Sanji screamed throwing his hands in the air. "I'm defending myself from your stupid ass accusations! And it's _not_ fucking selfish. I've been trying to talk to you for _weeks_ about it!"

"Yeah and it's always whenever you want. I just got home again and it's the same questions!"

"Well fucking yeah, when your boyfriend ignores big ass shit that's happening in your life you want to talk about it with him! I've been trying to sit down and talk with you _!_ "

Zoro dramatically dragged a hand down his face. The man narrowed his eyes glaring at the blond. "See. Exactly what I mean." He started spitefully. "Only _Sanji_ has time that's worth it, everyone else can bow down to him!"

"That's not what I mean and you fucking know it!" Sanji defended stepping up to face Zoro chest to chest.

"Isn't it? We're always talking about you lately." Zoro scoffed coldly using his two and a half inches of height on his boyfriend to tower over him mockingly. Sanji seethed.

"Well how about _you_ live in a fucking different country and have _your_ boyfriend ignore your fucking problems and find out just how _easy_ it is to find other people to talk about it to, hmmm?" The blond spat with all the malice he could.

"You're such a fucking drama queen!" Spat the swordsman, rolling his eyes. The green haired lummox turned and idly strode further into the room and seated himself on the bed. It was always fucking like this with Sanji.

"It's not dramatic!" The blond shouted following. His voice softened and he continued. "Zoro, I'm leaving in a _week_ and we've discussed _nothing_. New shit's come up and it's crazy! It _is_ a fucking big deal, ok, and we've barely talked about it! Why _aren't_ we talking about it?!"

"What's so big about it?" Zoro stated blithely as he begun taking off his socks pointedly _not_ looking at the distressed blond. "You'll be gone three months to study under some obnoxious chef I asked you not to apply for anyway." He heard Sanji's sharp inhale ready to defend that pastry chef but he continues on not allowing the blond the time to interrupt. "You're gonna miss my tournament, my birthday, Choppers birthday - who you promised to make a cake for by the way – and you're not in the least bit sorry about it because," Zoro changed his voice to imitate the blond with a high pitch whine _'he's a very_ _important_ pâtissier _, Zoro. He_ never _takes apprentices but he said yes to_ my _work. Zeff can only teach me so much about pastries and I wanna be the best._ '"

Sanji stood fuming. His blond hair fell over his eye and his hands were clenched at his side.

"Is that how you fucking see things?" He asked in barely a whisper.

Zoro knew his words had stung and he was happy. This whole argument had been pricking barbs into his skin and he was happy to return one to the blond. His anger that built during their stupid fight blinded him and instead of seeing the depressed slump of his lover's shoulders he saw blond hair defiantly shielding blue irises.

And he _smiled_.

Sanji raised his head. Angry tears were in his eyes. "You're such an asshole." He whispered.

And for some reason, that stung more than any other thing the blond had said that night and it made Zoro _feel_. He was not the kind of guy to dwell on things, he usually was very true to himself and didn't lie often but this argument that seemed to keep springing up the past couple of weeks made him _feel_ … made him feel things he wasn't ready to address just yet. However, in that moment, there was no such clarity in his mind, only a burning uncomfortableness that made him feel… _vulnerable_ …

And Zoro was far from vulnerable so he lashed out. Like a tiger cornered he bared his teeth and held his ground not letting his opponent know just how rattled he'd become.

 _You're such an asshole._

The sound lingered in the air despite the silent aftermath and for some reason Zoro found himself saying the words he would regret each day for the next four years.

"Well then." He started with a huff of haughtiness as he stood from the bed to glare at his lover. "Why the fuck _are_ you still around then?"

There was silence for a good moment and Zoro actually found himself proud in his bluff. Sanji was obviously too attached to give a reason to leave. For fucks sake, the man had many chances to go back to France over their two-year relationship and said no to all of them. He would calm down and realise this was all a huge fucking mistake and that Zoro had been right all along. Sanji would see that he _did_ need to be by Zoro's side instead of traipsing the globe. Sanji would realise that, like Zoro had been thinking for weeks, Sanji was selfishly separating them for three months when there was _no need._ Sanji would come to see that it wasn't _fair_ to have gone about this all behind Zoro's back and that three months was too long a time to be apart. But as the silence grew on, a sliver of doubt wedged its way through and when the silence was broken, it was not at all how Zoro imagined it to go.

"You know," the blond said, tears in his eyes yet his face held up, strong and in control. "I'm starting to wonder the exact fucking thing myself lately."

The next second he had left the room.

The next minute Zoro heard the front door close.

The next hour he went to bed, fuming silently about stupid blonds and their dramatics.

The next day he pointedly ignored several phone calls determined to show the bastard just who needed who in their life.

The next week he regretted not picking up one of those calls as Luffy knocked him upside the head and told him Sanji was never coming back and he had a message to pass on.

It was over.

* * *

The skyline shone with the burning embers of the sunset. Japan's glorified blazing red sun just beginning to drip below the horizon to set the town to slumber. Sanji let out the breath he held with a long stream of smoke. He felt calm. It was certainly not how he expected to feel when he returned, not that he had ever really planned to.

" _Papa, grand-père is here!"_ A cute little blond bounded over to him babbling in rushed French. Sanji quickly exhaled the last of his cigarette and crushed the filter into the provided ash trays before bending down to face his son.

" _So, shall we go?_ " He smiled as he fixed his little blue coat. For spring, it was rather chilly still.

 _"Yes! Grand-père promised he'd make sushi tonight!"_ The little boy sang as his clutched to Sanji's shoulders. Sanji smiled. His son's beaming face was always a treat. The heavy honk of a horn blared and Sanji rolled his eyes. Only one man in Japan would cause such a racket leaning on the horn like that. That man's name was Zeff.

" _Come on,"_ Sanji sighed as he smiled down at his boy, gathering their luggage. " _Let's go before he dies of impatience."_

His son's childish giggles lifted what little doubt was still in his heart.

He hoped they would be happy here.

* * *

Uploaded 1st Feb 2018

So here is the start of a new story of mine. I've had several ZoSan ideas floating around in my mind and when I started writing this one, it just exploded into more than I expected it would be. I'm not sure why, but I got really inspired to write this, so here it is. This is the sort of preface to what the fic will be about but I really hate naming chapters 'preface' on fanfiction because it ruins the whole number system in the chapter upload ;) yup that's pretty much it.

The _italicized_ lines will be French and possibly later on Spanish as well. They're written out in italics because I still want the reader to understand the dialogue. Is it jarring or useful? Personally, I think it's useful, but I'm always interested in what others think of it. Let me know!

I hope to try and post every two(ish) weeks so I hope things work out on that front. I have some written up of what comes next but I'm just re-reading and editing so please let me know what you liked, didn't like or any suggestions for my writing :) I hope you like it thus far!


	2. Chapter Two

CHAPTER TWO

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

"Strike! Strike ! Strike!" Zoro walked to the end of his students calling out attacks with short pauses in between. "Strike! Rest!"

Immediately his students bowed and knelt on the dojo ground. Zoro quickly scanned their faces behind their masks and was pleased to see them puffing with exertion but not so easily winded. It was good that they were improving their tolerance, the match ahead would challenge them in many more ways but they were ready to face them. Zoro withheld a smile and turned his fierce eyes to his kneeling students.

"Good work today." He started. His voice booming across the training hall. "I expect you to train throughout the week. The tournament will be held in two weeks so don't slack off now."

"Hai!" His students called as one and Zoro felt a flurry of pride rise up within him.

"You've trained hard and have been focused. Remember to take time to balance yourself from within and keep a fighting spirit." He reminded. He turned to face one young teen. "Captain." He nodded to him.

The young man stood. "Stand." He called and waited for the group to follow his lead. When all the students had risen he continued. "Bow." Once again, all the students followed suit.

"Thank you, sensei." They all called as one and Zoro bowed back in acknowledgement.

"See you all next week." He called and watched as they finally dispersed themselves getting organized into packing up their gear and heading for the change rooms.

Zoro busied himself with inspecting his own weapons as the last vestiges of his students slugged from the training room. Another day, another well done practice. He was very proud of his students. They'd worked hard for this.

"Oh ho, look who has his proud sensei face on now." He heard teasing from the open sliding doors and turned to face that cheery face of freckles nestled in arms resting on the raised porch that faced the garden. "Zoro, man, you're slipping. What happened to Mr. Stoic Sensei?" Ace continued as he swung down up to sit on the edge of the verandah, his shoed feet dangling off the wooden edge in respect for the dojo.

"Ace." He said by way of acknowledgement. It wasn't that he disliked seeing his friend, it was just that Ace rarely ever came by the dojo. If he needed Zoro, he'd swing by his place or pass a message on with Luffy. In fact, Zoro would venture to say this would be the first time ever seeing the brunette at the dojo. "What brings you here?" He asked as he rested his weapon in its case and headed for the verandah.

"What? Can't a friend stop by your workplace?" Zoro pinned him with an unimpressed look tightening his kendogi as he came to the doorway. Spring had already begun a month ago but even though there was no snow, it was still quite nippy out for April, the cherry blossoms would be struggling to appear this year. Ah well, better late than never he thought idly. Ace just laughed scratching his head.

"Ah well." The fireman sighed as he rubbed the back of his head. "I came all the way here, but I can't think of one way to start the conversation."

Zoro repressed rolling his eyes. "Like I said, what conversation? You've said nothing but you coming here in and of itself is weird." Zoro stated. A second later his eyebrows shot up. "Someone's not hurt art they?" He asked with immediate concern. Maybe Luffy finally had his ass handed to him by some freak or other.

"Ah," Ace huffed nervously. "Not anything like that." There was a beat of silence. Zoro was done with the wishy-washy guessing, it was never his thing. If he stayed quiet long enough, people usually had the urge to fill the silence on their own. Ace didn't prove him wrong.

"Say, Zoro." Ace started awkwardly. "Do you…do you ever stop by the Baratie at all?"

If he thought he knew what he'd be expecting from Ace, it was definitely not that. The Baratie was a sore topic for him. In fact, anything relating to Sanji was something that had become somewhat of a taboo topic around the resident swordsman. Not that he cut people out of his life for it or anything, it was just… any time anyone brought up topics like that, he just…shut down. Not out of depression or anything. He simply was immersed in his own thoughts. He'd become melancholy and dazed and eventually his friends stopped asking – stopped putting him in that position.

If you'd have asked him four years ago if he'd be happy with his life in the next five years he would have said a confident ' _yes'_. He'd been training for the nationals of kendo, judo and akido. His father had all but said he'd be inheriting the dojo in the next couple of years and that knowledge had excited him to train harder, be better and win. He had a comfortable life with his friends supporting him all the way and was finishing up his business management course at university all paid for by his kendo scholarship. Also, he had had the love of his life by his side. His world had never been brighter…and he had taken it for granted.

"Zoro?" His named called softly by Ace shook him from his thoughts. Shaken from his daze he shook his head slightly.

"Nah, sorry Ace." He murmured then coughed and straightened up. Why did he let such small things affect him so much? "Nah, man. I haven't been anywhere near the Baratie in a long while." He started. He knew that Ace often liked to pop into the Baratie as their food was beyond supreme but Zoro could only bring himself to go every now and then and even when he did, late at night.

"You know the old man didn't like me too much to begin with and well with how things…" He trailed off, not wanting to verbalize those thoughts and emotions. Strangely, Ace too seemed to make Zoro spill so much about himself when the brunette stayed silent. Maybe is was a D. brothers' thing. Luffy also seemed to wield that amazingly unique power.

Ace made a sound of understanding and Zoro cleared his throat once more. "He doesn't like to see me around there too much." He ended.

On the occasions he _did_ go to the Baratie, Zoro made sure to seat himself at the bar and Zeff made sure to glare at him fiercely as well as shout some insults about green haired morons his way every time he came out from the kitchen. Still, at the end of the night, when there were only a few customers left, Zeff would pretend to come over to the bar to count up the till. The old man would pour himself a drink. Whiskey. Straight. And sometimes, if he was feeling generous, one for Zoro as well and Zoro would ask him about Sanji. Of course, the old man never made the asking easy and there were a lot of things he refused to answer saying it was none of Zoro's business in his usual clipped tone. Nonetheless, he would let Zoro know how Sanji was at work, that he was ok and even Zoro could tell that Zeff didn't hate him _that_ much if he was sharing these small things with him. Even so, it was a private moment between the two of them – sharing memories of a loudmouth blond that was halfway across the world – and Zoro was sure it was something Zeff preferred to keep on the downlow. Especially since in those moments, you could see the loneliness rolling off the old man like waves. Despite all the kicking and hate filled words that went between the two blonds, Zeff and Sanji had a close relationship and on those late nights, sometimes the old man's mask would slip and Zoro would catch a glimpse of just how much his foolish words to Sanji had affected others as well. Zeff wouldn't appreciate Zoro mentioning any of that to Ace so he kept his mouth shut. Besides, it really wasn't any of Ace's business. Actually, Zoro hadn't gone to see Zeff since the end of January, now. He wondered if anything new had changed with Sanji-

Suddenly something in his brain clicked and he whirled around fast to face Ace fully instead of getting lost in his own thoughts. Ace jolted a little, startled by the action and backed up seeing Zoro's serious face.

"Ace." Zoro started coolly. "What's happened with Sanji?"

"Well uh," Ace stuttered, rubbing his neck again. "You see, I'm not really sure if I should say anything…but then I thought, if I was in your position I'd wanna know…and I wasn't told _not_ to say anything-"

"For fucks sake Ace!" Zoro shouted kneeling down to grab onto Ace's shirt. "What's happened to Sanji!?" He yelled.

Ace clutched Zoro's hands trying to stave off the shaking. "Hey man. Relax, he's ok." He started and sighed as Zoro relaxed his grip. Ace hopped of the verandah and stood on the floor looking up at Zoro's stressed face.

"Look." He started calmly. "I wasn't told _not_ to say anything, and I thought you'd wanna know." He said eyes boring into Zoro's and his face oddly serious. Zoro remained kneeling, his attention glued to Ace.

"It's Sanji…he's back."

It seemed ridiculous that those few words could shake him up so much and make him freeze once more that such hope and dread equally filled his body that his mind almost refused to work after hearing those words.

"You're not joking, Ace?" He managed to stutter. It was like he was suddenly drowned in a tsunami of emotions. Guilt, elation, fear, hope, despair – he felt them all simultaneously and it was almost too much to handle. Ace's hand resting on his shoulder barely shook him from his thoughts. He looked up into Ace's worried eyes.

"He's here?" He asked. Scarcely able to believe it. All Ace could do was nod in confirmation, his hand clenching slightly on Zoro's broad shoulder. Zoro let out a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding. Relief? Thankfulness? He wasn't sure what he was feeling but all he knew was he'd never been so terrified and relieved at the same time.

"When-" he cut himself off to swallow back some of the emotion in his voice. To his surprise, his voice was practically thick with tears though none were falling. He cleared his throat. "When did he come back?" If Sanji had only come back one or two days ago, it would be best to allow for a few more days of settling back in before he went 'round himself to see the blond. Not that he was sure Sanji would want to see him – but even so he had to try. Then again, if Sanji was only back for a short visit, going to see him as soon as possible would probably be best. He'd not regret ignoring Sanji's presence again. That was something he was desperate not to repeat. After a few more beats of silence, Zoro realised that Ace had not answered his question. He'd been unfocused, already trying to plan when to see him but now he glanced up at Ace to ask why he was still silent. "Ace when did he-"

The brunette was not usually so squrimish, but the look on his face was that of a child that had literally been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Before he could ask again, his friend exploded with his defense.

"It's been about a month!"

It was pure shock that kept Zoro silent and it was enough for the brunette to plough on.

"I wasn't sure you see, like if he wanted you to know, or if he'd up and bounce out of here again without so much as a goodbye. But then I'd visit him every couple of days and it seemed he was pretty stable here. Said he was here for old Zeff and you know, never gave any indication that he was here for good and…And well, I wanted to bring you up, but he was just so… _indifferent_ about the matter that I couldn't be blunt with him, you _know_ how he is when he gets like that and well he didn't say I _couldn't_ let you know and so I…I…"

Zoro's head was reeling.

Sanji had been back…since _March?_ How the fuck had he not found out? Had not known? For fucks sake, _Ace_ had known! It was as if years of dreaming had come true in an instant and Zoro was not at all sure how to deal with that. It had been in his fantasies for four years. Sanji's return or his own trip to France to woo and win back the love of his life. That was all fine and dandy in one's imagination but real people were not as frivolous as movie plots and simply trying to strike up the courage to buy a plane ticket to Paris for no other than to try and win back a lover who had so obviously ended things between the two, was no easy task. It was no wonder he hadn't even accomplished the task whilst drunk. People just weren't _that_ dumb. Besides, who was to say Sanji wanted to see him in Japan anyway? He was back for Zeff, told Ace as much anyway. How would the cook feel if Zoro was just to miraculously appear in front of him one day? Would he be happy? Disgusted? Would it ruin the rest of his day or make it the best one ever? It was so easy to fall back onto those stupid movie plots. Usually, in a romance film, no matter how weird the stunt, it was seen as romantic. But he'd spent enough late nights snuggled up with Sanji on the couch listening to his boyfriend moan and groan about the moronic things people and directors passed off in such movies as romantic. Some of the big movie clichés that were so _romantically_ acclaimed, Sanji himself had steamed and stewed over being borderline stalkerish, possessive or sadistic. What hope did he have of winning over the suspicious blond by rocking up unannounced at his door? What if Sanji saw him as one of those overzealous exes that couldn't understand the term 'no'?

"-oro? Zoro!" Ace calling his name brought him back a bit and he raised a hand to wipe down his face. This was all too much.

"Yeah." He muttered, letting his friend know he was responsive again. After dragging the hand slowly off his face, he looked the elder D. brother in the eyes, absolutely beyond helpless. "What the fuck should I do, Ace?" He asked.

It was a testament to how confused he was. Zoro rarely asked for any kind of help. He always thought of himself as the kind of 'do I what I think is right' guy and thus often ploughed through social convention forging his own path, but this situation had him rattled. Besides, it was his selfish attitude that had sent Sanji running back to France for four years that had caused all this, so he needed someone more grounded at the moment to explain things clearly to him.

"To be honest," Ace started, his brown eyes boring into Zoro's with a seriousness he only reserved for rare occasions. "You should see him." He let the words sink in and then clenched Zoro's shoulder once more making sure the green haired man was paying attention to his words. "Is it the right thing? Is now the right time? I have no idea." He let that information settle on Zoro and saw indecision once again take over his features. "The thing is Zoro," he said in a louder voice, making sure his next important sentence was noted. "You won't ever know."

There was a breath of silence and Ace was about to continue but felt the need to stay silent for a few moments longer. Zoro looked contemplative and processing the information and so he went on.

"You won't ever know before you act if it was the right time. But you could spend ages waiting for it and miss it and wouldn't it be worse to miss out because you did nothing, than miss out because you tried?"

Zoro nodded as he stood from his crouch giving his joints some relief. Ace looked up at him, concern plainly written on his face. "You're right." He murmured and yet tension he hadn't felt in years kept crawling up his spine and clenching his heart painfully. When was the last time he had been so afraid of something? He let out a long breath closing his eyes and when he did he focused on Ace's face.

"When should I-" He trailed off. He was not used to asking for so much advice, even from Ace who was open and caring and never teased him for his concerns. It was just so unnatural to him.

"We could go tonight? Say, five? Sanji doesn't have the late shifts as often anymore." Ace put in tentatively. From his shifting stance and worried eyes Zoro could tell that the pyrotechnician was concerned he was pushing Zoro too fast. But perhaps this was what he needed. It was easy to say you lived boldly, it was another to actually act on it. And especially in matters of the heart, it was leaving oneself open to a potential slurry of attacks that you had let down absolutely all your defenses on.

"It might be too soon. But if you want, we could go together?" Ace started again. "You know, if you need a reason to show up?" He said with forced cheer.

"Yeah." Zoro confirmed with a small smile. "Yeah that would be great."

* * *

Zoro pulled the collar of his parker over his neck a little higher. It was already fucking spring, but in the evening it felt like bloody winter all over again. He stood waiting under a lamppost a little further down the street from the Baratie. It was funny, but he felt like a miscreant standing so suspiciously for so long. Still, Ace had said to meet at eight and he'd be damned if he got himself lost before then. Showing up a little early was a small price to pay. He was so damned nervous. He hadn't seen Sanji in so long, what if he'd changed? What if he thought Zoro had changed? Well he hoped to some extent, the blond could see the change within himself. He hoped he wasn't as selfish as he was a few years before. Even so, the thought of a new version of Sanji thrilled and terrified him. What if they were no longer compatible? What if Sanji's tastes in partners had changed? What if Zoro had changed enough that Sanji no longer saw him as desirable? What if he hadn't changed enough? Sure, physically he'd muscled out a bit more over the past four years, but that was to be expected with how young they were at the time. Now at twenty-five he was pretty much done growing.

His eyes caught sight of Ace across the street almost at the doors of the Baratie and with one last big breath of air to fill him with courage, he moved off the lamppost to greet his friend outside the entry.

"Hey." He called as he came up close to the brunette.

"Hey." Ace called back with a smile. Zoro could see the hint of worry on his friend's face though but he never liked being at the receiving end of pity looks. Ace knew this and quickly broadened his smile into a more relaxed one. "Shall we?" He asked with his usual childishness.

Zoro afforded him a grunt and his friend opened the doors to the chiming of crystal bells. The interior was at it had always been but for some reason Zoro felt a change. It was probably his overactive imagination making him feel as if the air was different here now because Sanji was back. He stifled the thought and followed Ace to the empty bar. He had expected them to be seated at a table but he wasn't going to argue about the bar. He doubted he could stomach anything now with how nervous he was anyway. None of the staff were at the bar as of yet, but it wouldn't be long before someone showed, after all, the maître d had pointed them in this direction.

Ace was already shucking off his leather bomber jacket and resting it on the empty stool next to him. Zoro followed suit and was just arranging himself next to his friend when he heard Ace call out.

"Bartender, what does it take to get a scotch on the rocks here?" He hollered playfully. Zoro looked up to see who Ace was speaking to so casually before his brain caught up and his eyes raised to see Sanji emerging from the storeroom.

It was like all time stopped for a moment. The cook looked _fine_. A little taller, more toned but...damn. Those long legs that went on forever and that tight ass were barely hidden by complimentary chic black slacks that emphasized all the right places. Sanji wore a plain long sleeve white button-down that was rolled up to his elbows no doubt for the fact that he was playing bartender tonight if the long café style apron around his waist was any indicator. His blond hair was as silky as ever but he now sported a rather sexy blond goatee that Zoro immediately wanted to lick and play with to see if the skin underneath was just as sensitive as always. But it was his eyes, those amazing blue irises that haunted his dreams that had Zoro completely lost for words. It was obvious that the past four years had been kind to Sanji if his impeccable looks were anything to go by.

It was as if he had had an hour to take in all of these new things and create all these suppositions, but in reality, all those thoughts flew through his mind within seconds and the next thing he knew, his own eyes had met with striking blue ones and he just noticed the brief look of surprise pass over that gorgeous face before it was pushed back by what Zoro could only assumed was complete and utter indifference. Again, Zoro felt his heart sink to the bottom of his feet as he instantly began to wonder why the hell he was here anyway. The urge to quickly gather his belongings and leave his ex to his new life struck hard. Why the fuck would Sanji want him back in his life? Especially when he looked like _that_? Luckily, his body reacted slower than his mind and he once again tuned into his surroundings to see Sanji walking up confidently to them the crate of Jagger in his hands carried as if it were a feather and his sassy retort to Ace left his thin lips.

"Fucking manners, you ape!" He started as he plonked down the heavy crate. "And call me bartender again and we'll see just how well you can drink with a hole in your stomach." He ended with a small grin. Ace guffawed and reached over to meet Sanji's hand in a shake before the blond turned to face the swordsman.

"Zoro." He said with a small nod as a way of greeting. "It's been a while hasn't it? I'll admit, I'm surprised to see you here. How have you been?"

Was it possible for your heart to shatter and bind the broken pieces back together again all in a millisecond? That's what it felt like had happened. Zoro's face was stoic as ever but Sanji's greeting had broken and mended him simultaneously. It was such a confusing feeling. The fact that the blond was so unaffected by seeing him, surprised – yes, but really who wouldn't be seeing their ex – made him realise just how much he wasn't a part of the cook's life anymore. And yet, the man held out the olive branch of friendship in the very calm manner of ' _I can still be polite and treat you like a person, no matter what went on between us in the past.'_ The painful truth that he had always known deep down resurfaced; _It was always me that needed him more than he ever needed me._ Still, with just the sound of his name leaving his ex's lips, he had lost any hold he had had over his own heart and knew immediately that this man alone was king of it. It was so heartbreaking to realise that the one person you wanted more than anything did not see you in that way anymore. Even so, he put on a brave face and gave a small, albeit shaky smile.

"It's been too long." He murmured. "I'm glad you're looking well. The Baratie's glad to have you back, huh?" He asked, pointedly ignoring the question about his own well-being. It was something he'd rather not go into. Sure, he could talk about his successes in his tournaments and with the dojo but they were trivial to the sense of loss he had felt without the blond by his side.

Sanji smiled; a genuine one that graced his features and made him seem even more handsome than usual. "Yeah." He spoke breathily. "It's great to be back. The old place is almost exactly the same."

"Zeff been giving you hell as usual?" Ace piped in, resting his elbows on the bar as he leaned forward.

A bark of laughter left the blond as he nudged the crate on the floor with his foot and turned to grab a bottle of Highland Park for his friend. "Between us, I think the old man's gone soft." He started in a voice just above a whisper grabbing a glass and giving a questioning glance to Zoro who nodded that he'd also like one. "He's barely yelled at me since I've come back let alone chewed my ear off for some shit or other." Both Ace and Zoro let out barks of laughter as Sanji set down the two glasses and begun pouring out the drinks for the two men.

"He's missed you, Sanji." Ace stated a bittersweet smile on his face and his eyes soft with emotion. And for about the hundredth time that day Zoro felt his heart squeeze as Sanji blushed a little and brushed off the attention and kind words with some haughty response that was completely lost on Zoro as he soaked in the enigma that was Sanji. The pair before him continued their friendly banter and the swordsman was content in watching it all unfold. So many years wasted and yet in this moment it felt like nothing had changed at all.

Sanji was before him. Impeccably beautiful as ever, the life of the party – a genuine people person who dazzled the room with his personality. Zoro sat back, watching. Much like he used to do back then, enjoying the animated faces Sanji made when engaged in conversation. The way his eyes lit up. How he could good naturedly tease just about anyone and get away with it, ending up with the person he was chatting to laughing onside with him. That swanlike neck thrown back in laughter and the most amazing blue eyes crinkling with mirth, long lashes resting against full cheeks making Zoro realise just how much of a miracle it was that this man was _his._

Only Sanji _wasn't_ his.

Not anymore.

And the night went on like that. Sanji flittering between catching up with his old friends and serving the other customers that showed up and Zoro losing himself in the moment feeling all the feelings he had felt four years ago only to come crashing down with a rock in the pit of his stomach when reality crashed into him in the face. And yet, he couldn't walk away. Sanji was as gracious as ever, talking to Zoro with none of the anger he had initially been expecting or the romantic longing that he'd hoped for. He truly had moved on and, from the way he spoke with the green haired man, Zoro was both a little saddened to realise that he wasn't being pined over _and_ elated that Sanji didn't think it necessary to cut him out of his like completely. He was a mess of all ups and downs tonight. They chatted and drank, Sanji joining them for a round or two and bartending for the other customers that came and went, and before they knew it, an hour had passed and all those feelings of despair had completely and utterly left Zoro.

Who cares if they couldn't go back to how they were? What was stopping Zoro from acting now? As a more mature, wiser young man who had learnt the errors of his ways and wanted to change, wanted to be better? The more the three of them talked, the more confident he grew and Sanji's naturally congenial nature made up for what Zoro's fears had destroyed. A bridge was forming once again and Zoro needed to show Sanji that he wanted to help build it. Not only that, he was ready and willing to provide and pay for all the materials necessary to make up for his past actions. He was no longer scared, burning bridges before unknowns could cross. He was ready to actively create them and reaching out to Sanji was the first step.

It was probably no small help from the alcohol, but Zoro decided then and there that at the end of the bartender's shift, he'd ask to talk with him and make clear his intentions.

He still loved Sanji and he wanted him back.

Sanji was off down the other end of the bar chatting with some rosy cheeked middle-aged man that was paying a little _too_ much attention to the handsome bartender. Zoro's feathers of jealously were ruffled but watching the way that Sanji delicately removed his hand from the slightly wasted man's own with what looked to be a backhanded insult the man was too drunk to comprehend, soothed him slightly. He caught Ace's knowing side glance at him and rolled his eyes not saying anything to the freckled man who simply chuckled into his drink. He went back to watching the blond. Yep. He would ask to talk. Hopefully, with how things were going tonight, Sanji would be ok with that and they'd probably sneak out to the back alley so Sanji could smoke and they could discuss matters in private.

It would be like them as teenagers, when Sanji was the university's exotic Frenchman and Zoro was trying to get as close as he could to the mysterious and powerful blond. He had often cornered the cook right out there in the back alley of the Baratie wanting to talk. He had thought himself romantic and it was only after they had started dated that Sanji confessed it had been downright creepy at first and if it wasn't for Ace's constant defense of Zoro's character he would have never given the moss-head the time of day. Back in the day, he'd meet Sanji during his smoke break to chat and woo the blond, promising to come back every night with Sanji's cursing and threats to end him if he did. He had thought his tough guy persona was cool and mysterious – mysterious enough for the intriguing blond. Luckily, Sanji had been a good sport about the whole ordeal and they had had many a good conversation about life in the dimly lit alley. Tonight, when they got there, he would be frank. He'd honestly tell Sanji how much he regretted his words that night Sanji left. He'd ask for forgiveness and wait out the painfully long time Sanji would spend inhaling his cancer stick. He'd suck it up knowing that Sanji had probably been waiting a whole lot longer for Zoro's apology and when the blond would finally finish his cigarette and tell Zoro to _get fucked_ , he'd reach over and gently hold Sanji's hand before saying he'd be back tomorrow night catching the cook completely off guard.

It was crazy how easy it was to dream all over again. Now that Sanji was back and didn't hate him, he felt like he could take on the world and that started tonight.

His eyes trailed after the blond's lithe form moving from patron to patron topping up glasses and giving small chat as he created colourful cocktails. Yes. He was ready to try again. There was no way he could live knowing Sanji could be in his life if only he tried.

Sanji's laugh pulled his attention and he found himself captivated. He watched the blond take empty glasses and head back over to where he and Ace sat.

"You sods, soaked off enough yet?" He asked jovially and Zoro and Ace both joined in with grins. The man's smile was infectious.

Ace laughed good naturedly and smiled. "Actually, I think I wi-"

"EGGPLANT!" Zeff's gruff voice cut across the room and Sanji's head perked up to acknowledge his stepfather who was crossing the floor with a little more speed than the man usually did to start an argument. The usual patrons of the establishment paid no mind. The father and son were known for their squabbling and ridiculous arguments. Nowhere was safe from the havoc they created. Bickering that started in the kitchen often spilled out onto the floor and many people came here specifically for the familiar atmosphere the two created. Zeff now reached the bar and it was usually at this point where the two started their heated battles. So Zoro was surprised when the older man simply slipped behind the bar and sidled up to Sanji who quirked an eyebrow.

"The daycare just called." He started, speaking in a low undertone yet loud enough that Ace and Zoro heard clearly. "Little eggplant's got a fever. They need you to pick him up. Worried that he'll infect the other ankle biters."

Sanji's eyes tightened. And Zoro's heart stopped. Had he actually heard correctly? Judging from the way Ace had stilled by his side, he assumed he had. He returned to his mind to catch Sanji murmuring worriedly. "This morning I was worried he was a little warm…I should have-"

"Should have what eggplant?" Zeff cut in clasping Sanji's shoulder. "You're not a psychic. How're you to know that the little tyke'd get a fever?" He continued in his no-nonsense talk and ended with a soft slap on his son's shoulder. He could see however that his words were little comfort to the gangly blond that was mentally beating himself up over it all.

Sanji began pulling off his apron. "Zeff, I wanna take time off-"

"You ain't taking no bloody time off!" Zeff bellowed making all three men near him jump before Zoro and Ace tried to go back to pretending to not listen in. "Your son needs you. I'm giving you the rest of the night off. And If I see you in here tomorrow, I'll kick your ass back home myself!" He gruffed.

Sanji offered a weak smile in gratitude and placed the apron on the counter before turning to Ace and Zoro.

"I'll see you some other time then." He said in way of goodbye, no other explanation given. Zoro was still left feeling that the world had been taken away from under his feet. His gaze followed after the only man he ever wanted in his life as he left in a frazzled state. He barely heard Ace's shout making plans for coming by tomorrow as realisation slowly started to filter into his alcohol-soaked brain and it became clear that his fears had always stood true.

Sanji had moved on with his life and with that move, there was no longer space for a love-struck swordsman.

* * *

Uploaded 14th Feb 2018

So here is chapter two! Happy Valentines Day! Though, I guess for those of you in the US it might be early...?

I had about half of this written when I last posted but needed to flesh it out and edit, edit edit! Please let me know if you see any mistakes, I hate that in my work! I also realise my writing style can be somewhat annoying for people to read. I generally like to write long ongoing sentences that construct thoughts of the characters but is this hard to follow? If it is, let me know, I want to work on my writing style but I guess, we'll see just how it works now :)

Thank you kindly for all the reviews, follows and favourites of the last chapter! It really made my day seeing how many people wanted to read this fic and motivated me to continue! Thanks to Raigon for your review! There's no way I intend to blow off little eggplant's story that easily! I'm glad you're onside with this! And thanks to Jujus as well! I'm sorry that I can't commit to more frequent uploads but as you can see, the length I intend the 'chapters' to be is much longer than the 'preface' I first uploaded, so two weeks is pretty much the minimum I need for editing to make sure I don't contradict myself as I write and edit my work thoroughly... thanks for sticking by though for the uploads! It means a lot!


	3. Chapter Three

CHAPTER THREE

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

The air was frigid. He'd forgotten his jacket on the stool next to him but by the time he realised he was already a block from the Baratie. The biting sting from the wind that whipped around him was a welcome feeling. It rivaled the pain he felt in his heart and made him feel less shattered on the inside.

"Zoro?"

He heard the call and the man running up from behind but ignored it. Ace was a good man, but right now Zoro was all sorts of broken and wanted no one to see him like this.

"Zoro!"

The yell was desperate and made Zoro stop. For some reason he couldn't summon the anger he had first felt at wanting to be alone. All he could conjure was despair. Even so, he had a question he wanted answered and so he waited. Ace's footfalls were approaching him now most likely less than a meter behind him so he waited a beat to be sure Ace would hear him before he spoke.

"Did you know?" He asked in barely a whisper.

Ace came to stop alongside him.

"Fuck." The man breathed. "No." Zoro could hear the sorrow and pity in that tone and swallowed his own grief. "Zoro," Ace started. "If I knew… if I had _any_ idea I wouldn't have asked you to come. I swear."

Zoro closed his eyes. Ace still stood beside him and Zoro could tell the freckled man was worried about his lack of reaction but he just needed a minute. Ace's tone was truly remorseful and Zoro knew him well enough to see that there was no way Ace would put him through that just for a laugh or to see how things played out. Absolutely not. Rather, he was the kind of friend that would have passed on the information himself in hopes to spare you from finding out in other awkward ways. This afternoon was proof of that.

"I know." He heard himself choking out and to his utter humiliation, even he could hear the tears in his voice. Ace's hand firmly clasped his shoulder in a silent apology and mutual understanding.

When Sanji had left to go…to pick up his _son_ … the two of them had sat for a while. Zoro staring at the door, Ace staring at Zeff and Zeff's piercing gaze leveled on the green haired swordsman.

 _"You're not making any trouble here, you hear me, boy?" Zeff clipped gruffly._

 _Zoro finally let his attention leave the door and looked at Zeff a million questions in his eyes. How could the old man not have told him? He'd thought that Zeff understood. Understood how much Zoro realised he had fucked up, how much he wanted to change things. How much he wanted Sanji back!_

 _Four years! He'd come, sit down at the bar and the old sea farer would chat about Sanji's life in France, all the fun he was getting up to, the achievements he'd made for himself and not once…NOT ONCE had he mentioned that Sanji had a family!_

 _Betrayal was the first thought that came crashing into his mind and it obviously played clearly on his face because Zeff's gaze narrowed into slits, anger clear and evident on his face._

 _"Listen here, laddie." Zeff started his tone broking no acceptance of refusal. "He's_ my _boy and this is_ his _home and_ his _life. When you fucked up four years ago was when you lost all rights of knowing his intimate business. I let you know he was ok because I'm not a_ complete _asshole, but don't you look at me like that! I'll take none of your stupid hurt feelings!"_

 _Zoro tried to hold Zeff's gaze but the old man's righteous words burned him and Zoro bent his head in shame. It was all fucking true after all but – Fuck. What the hell was he supposed to do now? He brushed a hand through his hair._

 _"Now wait a damn minu-" Ace started, rising out of his seat._

 _"Pipe the fuck down, freckles!" Zeff boomed. Stunned, Ace did as he said as the other patrons in the bar looked up in curiosity. "It's none of your business." He ended calmly._

 _Zoro could tell Ace was getting ruffled next to him and he finally found his voice. "He's right." Zoro admitted and he heard Ace still. His tone was defeated his words barely a whisper. "It's none of our business." He said, looking Zeff straight in the eyes._

 _They stayed like that, staring at each other for a moment before Zoro allowed his eyes to slide away with a soft sigh. He was feeling too emotional. Four years of pent up feelings were causing massive implosions within him. He had to get out before he became a slobbering mass of tears at the bar and that was one thing he wasn't going to allow himself to do. Okay, so Sanji had moved on; had a new family of his own. Zoro could at least walk out of here with his dignity if nothing else._

 _He steadied himself as he stood from his seat and his hand went in search for his card. But Ace was already there, fishing out his wallet and the freckled man threw down enough to cover their costs for the night with a silent glare at the old chef. With one more acquiescing nod to Zeff, Zoro turned and strode out of the bar._

"Fuck, Zoro." Ace cursed. "I don't know what to say. I mean, he never gave any indication, you know? I mean about a…family." The last word was uttered softly almost as if Ace himself didn't want to say it.

Zoro lifted his eyes to the sky. There was no moon tonight but still the stars shone on. Life went on whether you stood still or ran a million miles. He let memories wash over him. Sanji – his contagious enthusiasm; his spark for life; the way he smiled; his amazing cooking; the hypnotic way he fought.

Everything.

Everything that made Sanji was wonderful to Zoro and he realised that he had lost a lot more than he had first thought. Or was it that he had finally let his hopes rise only to come crashing down? Sanji was probably the only person Zoro felt he would do anything for. Just seeing him again made that all too clear. It was just the world's greatest shame that it had taken Sanji leaving his life to understand just how much the swordsman's world revolved around the blond chef.

"It can't be helped." Zoro said taking a deep breath and turning to face his friend. "At least he's happy." Ace's face was the picture of utmost empathetic grief and Zoro quirked a small smile in an attempt to make him feel better. His efforts were probably in vain because Ace's eyes scrunched up and the older man opened his mouth to speak but then closed it. He lowered his head and holding back his own tears he knocked the back of his right hand on Zoro's chest before clenching them into a fist. His hand rested there for what must have been minutes. Both men, standing silent on the street. Both grieving. One for lost love. The other for his friend.

* * *

Ace had never hated himself as much as he did in this moment. He felt so goddamn awful that he wanted some sort of karma to come and slap him in the face. Some sort of retribution for the deep pain he had caused one of his dearest friends. Zoro and he had parted ways hours ago, but he sat on his balcony overlooking Tokyo unable to sleep. No doubt Zoro too was struggling with rest tonight. Shit, how much of a fuckup could one man be?

He let a stream of smoke escape his mouth and dissipate into the icy night air.

What a fucking joke.

He had thought he'd been acting so selflessly tonight. Reuniting destined lovers at the cost of his own heart.

A month ago, when he'd seen Sanji come through the kitchen doors at the Baratie – casual as fuck, as if he'd been there the whole time – he didn't believe it. And yet, the blond chef was there, acting as if those four years of silence had never happened. As if he hadn't just fallen off the face of the earth four years before with only Zeff's say so on the fact that he was alive, happy and healthy.

His immediate thoughts had been utter elation that the blond was back. It was no secret why Sanji had left all those years ago. He'd been pretty frank with Luffy who had tried to change the cook's mind on the matter several times during that hectic week when the blond suddenly announced that his three-month trip was more likely gonna be a permanent move. He remembered coming by the cook's place to try and talk him out of it. Zeff let him in, his usual stoic face showing signs of concern that usually were thoroughly concealed. He'd entered, to see Sanji puffing away at a cigarette on the balcony, phone to his ear. As he got closer he saw the remnant of what seemed to be a whole pack in the ashtray. Reaching his friend, he stood in silence waiting for Sanji's call to be done. Without saying a word, the blond pocketed his phone and Ace raised an eyebrow in confusion he was about to ask about the non-call when Sanji spoke.

"He's not picking up." He murmured, in a defeated tone.

He didn't have to say who. It was obvious. Ace sucked in a breath seeing the absolute misery on his best friend's face. He'd always had a thing for the blond. But for as long as he had known him, Sanji had had Zoro and there was no way he was coming between that. Still, the utter torment on his face made Ace burn in anger for him and his heart clench in shared pain. Sanji released the smoke from his lungs in a slow steady stream.

"I guess it's fucking over." Sanji whispered barely able to say the words.

Immediately Ace stepped in and embraced him. One hand curled behind the blond's neck and guided his head to rest on his shoulder as his other arm came 'round to hold lightly to the blond's waist. Sanji leaned in for a moment, careful not to let his cigarette touch his friend. Ace was happy to be of some support. No tears were falling but he could feel the deep ache emanating from his friend's heart to his own.

"It's not over yet, Sanji." He said as firmly as he could. "You know Zoro loves you, he just needs time." He tried to assure.

The chef took a deep breath and stepped out of the embrace. Shaking his head he turned to the window and took a drag before facing Ace with sad blue eyes. "It's not him. I can't keep giving him me like this." Sanji admitted, his face was sad and a little apprehensive as if Ace's opinion of him would change with those words. "I can't keep waiting for him to see me...all of me." He said softly, knocking off some ash in the tray. "I'm tired of being misunderstood. Tired of not talking about my problems. It's so exhausting trying to keep this going on my own."

The brunette swallowed thickly as he registered his friend's words. It was the first time Sanji had said as much and it finally hit Ace. How long had Sanji been having these thoughts? How long had he kept them to himself, talking to no one, trying to solve things all alone?

"Sanji." He whispered. "Sanji, Zoro _loves_ you! You _know_ that. I mean sure he's not answering now but-"

"-But what?" The chef cut in sharply. "Wait forever for him? Keep being ignored when its not convenient? Don't talk about my problems _at all_ so as not to ruin the mood?" The voice was biting and Ace sympathized with just how done Sanji was with all this.

"No." Ace affirmed. "No, you don't have to do all that. I'm sorry. I just…" He paused a second and looked directly into sapphire blue eyes. "I don't want you to feel like that. I'm sorry I never noticed." He apologized.

A single tear left blue eyes and Sanji took in a shuddering breath snuffing out the remnants of his smoke. "I love him _so_ much, Ace." He cried and again Ace stepped in to bring Sanji into a hug.

"I know, Sanji. I know." He acknowledged tucking Sanji's head under his chin. Together they crumpled to the ground, Sanji a mess of tears.

He knew then he had to let Sanji go. He couldn't replace Zoro in Sanji's heart and he didn't want to cheapen the blond's feelings by trying. Sanji was not happy here in Japan, and perhaps France could offer him something more to live for. So, he had said farewell at the airport with a cheery smile on his face all the while hiding the excruciating pain in his heart. He had not anticipated to be completely ignored by the blond as soon as the initial 'arrived safely' text had been sent. For four years, the only information any of the gang had gotten on Sanji had been through Zeff, it was obvious the blond had wanted to cut ties and he did it efficiently.

So, after the initial gratification that his friend and secret love was back, betrayal had come in full force and yet he was still too scared to act on it. Too scared to say how he had truly felt. Then that fear enveloped him and he was worried if he said one wrong word to Sanji, it could happen all over again. He'd done so once, what was stopping Sanji from packing up and leaving without so much as a goodbye if things went sour?

The few times he'd spoken with the blonde at the Baratie, Sanji never gave in to any probing about his plans, short or long term and quite frankly, Ace could admit, he was too fucking chicken to ask. Then yesterday, Luffy had come along. He had been suspicious of Ace's more frequent trips to the Baratie and Luffy's tag-a-long put everything in perspective. His younger brother had been ecstatic seeing Sanji. Arms flung quickly around broader shoulders and the little monkey wasted no time cheering and hugging and exclaiming happily about Sanji's return. In that moment, Ace saw how his own reaction to Sanji's return had been tainted. His own hurt feelings about being left behind when he had said nothing at all were his own fault. Sanji was not to blame for any of it. He said Sanji never reached out, but if he had loved Sanji as much as he claimed, why hadn't he tried harder? Why hadn't he gone to France?

Why did he still secretly blame Zoro for it all?

That realisation had shaken him to the core. It had been a passing thought in an endless tirade of self-evaluation but it highlighted certain things he'd chosen to forget for four years. It had made him really reexamine himself and his actions and what his real thoughts and feelings had been then and were now. He _did_ blame Zoro for it. Not out loud, not even in the way he acted. But somehow, for so long, he had always inwardly blamed Zoro for Sanji's departure and decision to stay in France, when maybe…maybe _he himself_ could have been part of the reason too.

And that was what tonight had been hadn't it?

He had convinced himself that he was being altruistic, that he was trying to reunite two fated people, but really, he had become so scared that _he_ would say something to drive Sanji away that he needed to bring in a scapegoat. If Sanji met with Zoro and things went sour, he could go right back to blaming Zoro for the horrible outcome instead of himself. It was his own attempt at protecting himself from being the villain, even if it was on some fucked up subconscious level. Now that he was aware of it, he was disgusted with himself.

What kind of friend was he? What kind of person?

How could he possibly look either of them in the eye again?

He needed to fix this. He needed to get his shit together and step aside. Fuck his own hurt feelings, Sanji had been hurting for much longer and anyone in their group could tell you just how much Zoro ached from his past actions. He closed his eyes, took another drag and thought back to the early days; when they were all happy, all having fun hanging out together.

Zoro never looked happier than when he was with Sanji and the same went for the blond too. They were inseparable. They fed off each other's enthusiasm; their passion for life, for each other. That's what made them so perfect. They were two people who worked in tandem so seamlessly that it was uncanny. No two people had understood each other so much.

Or so they all thought.

It was that last year when things started to fall apart. The two of them were a little more strained, they both had goals. Big ones. At the time, he thought it inevitable that they clash, but they had always gotten up once more; why should this time be any different? Besides, they were all getting older. The fanciful idea of blissful problem-free romance was a notion of their past – a misguided concept created in their youth from movies and books – no one _actually_ lived like that. And yet, no one in the group had ever paid mind to the thought that Sanji would get fed up and leave. It just showed how naïve they still were back then. But since that time, they had learnt their lesson. It was just a shame, that now, as per usual, Sanji was two steps ahead in the game of life.

Now he had a family. Responsibilities. Loyalty to people other than 'the crew'.

Ace knew Sanji had had a rough childhood. He never really spoke much about it other than the fact that if it weren't for Zeff, he'd probably be dead from drug overdose or bounced around from house to house in the French fostering system. Sanji didn't delve further and really, it seemed so outrageous to Ace's own straight cut path that he didn't want to pry lest it was insensitive. The blond had never really minded and they'd shared many good moments of close friendship, but it just made Ace wonder if he really should have pressed to know more about his friend's past. Would knowing have made it easier to relate? Easier to see where things were going wrong? Easier to understand where Sanji was coming from with his concerns or see the signs of his stress without being told?

He didn't know. He didn't have the answers.

Still, Ace thought as he puffed out the last of the cigarette and stubbed the end in the ash tray. It was about time he stopped thinking about himself, and thought about his friend and what was best for him. Whether that meant a life without Zoro or without him. He just wanted Sanji to be happy. He deserved that.

He stood from the sill leaving the window open. He never minded the cool air, he was too warm blooded anyway. Tomorrow he would go and see Zoro and then maybe together they'd go and see Sanji. If Sanji wanted to kick Ace out of his life, he'd have to say the damn words to his face.

There was no way he was letting Sanji struggle through life alone anymore.

* * *

His keys clunked together loudly as he rapidly pulled them from the lock of the car. He quickly ran a hand through disheveled locks. He took a second to stop and lean back against the blue Honda Civic. He needed a moment. Hell, he knew that coming back to Japan would mean the possibility of seeing Zoro again; he thought he was ready for that. Evidently, he was not.

He took another deep breath. Leo could wait one minute more – he wanted to see his son with a smile on his face, not this worried, panicked look he knew he wore. It had really thrown him for a loop. Since a month ago when Ace stumbled into the Baratie and discovered his reemergence in Japan, he had known that it might come out to the others. He'd been anticipating the time when one by one the old crew would wander in and in those daydreams, he had of course envisioned the swordsman coming along too. He had thought of it so often; what he would say, how he would act, but as soon as the man was there before him, all plans left his mind like dandelion fluff in the wind.

Zoro hadn't changed at all and yet so very much. He still had his hair styled in the exact same way. His fashion sense had stayed as it had since their university days. He still was ruggedly handsome with a sinfully muscled body. Obviously, there were changes. The man looked much more bulked up than his twenty-one-year-old self. Mother nature had crafted one perfect specimen in the marimo. It hurt to look at him. It hurt to realise that the man before him, who was so utterly beautiful, was not his any longer.

It was something he had thought he had come to terms with.

There had been so many lonely nights in Paris where he had contemplated calling and many more where he searched for company if only to stop his wandering thoughts when alone. He had contemplated trying to patch up the relationship they once had; but he'd long since realised that even though his heart traitorously cried that it still loved Zoro, his mind was right. It wasn't healthy to live like they did in the past.

Towards the end of their relationship, they had not been well. Their relationship was starting to become toxic and Sanji was the first to fall victim to its poison. It was why he left when he could. Over the last year, Sanji felt as if he could honestly say he no longer loved Zoro. How was it that one single glance at the man had him doubting himself all over again?

He shook his head to clear it and he stood up from leaning on his car.

Nevermind. He had to put it out of his mind. He had a son to look after now. One that was probably waiting anxiously for his papa _._ Running his fingers once more through his hair to straighten it somewhat he headed for the daycare doors. The front desk was empty as he entered to the soft chimes of bells and not a moment later, the beautiful Kari-chan entered from the playroom to the genkan area.

"Ah, Blackleg-san. I'm sorry to have to have called you in." She said by way of apology.

Sanji smiled as he shucked off his shoes at the door. "No problems at all _mademoiselle_." He said with a charming smile. "Is Leo ok? I hope he hasn't infected anyone else yet. I apologise that I didn't notice his illness this morning."

Kari turned with a blush and Sanji was once again reminded that he was the 'hot foreign dad' amongst the staff here. Ha, if only high school here had been so kind as these lovely ladies. "Oh no." She affirmed. "It's quite alright. With these things, you never know until they fully present themselves." He followed her into the playroom. "It's probably the change in environment, you know, different country, different atmosphere. It usually doesn't show up until they've settled down a bit, but he should be ok. It's just his body adjusting. Still, he should see a doctor." She smiled at him and Sanji was grateful for her assurance.

"Leo-kun." She called softly as she walked to the cushioned book reading bench where his small lump of a caterpillar lay down amongst several blankets. "Otou-san's here."

" _Papa's here?"_ Leo asked in sleepy French as he raised his messy bedhead from the pillow. Sanji felt his heart melt seeing how drowsy his poor son was. The poor mite was tuckered out. He followed suit across the play area and in three strides was kneeling by his precious baby's side.

" _Papa's here."_ He murmured softly and couldn't help the small smile that graced his face as he saw the brief happiness flit across his boy's face at seeing him before tiny arms came to circle around his neck and that small head rested on his shoulder. Sanji enjoyed the embrace for a short while before he brushed slightly curled blond locks away from his son's face to get a good look at him. Leo's face was red and his nose was starting to get blocked with mucus. The poor thing was just so darn tired as well.

" _My poor boy."_ He murmured again softly. Leo always felt more comfortable speaking in French and in times like these, he liked to cater to the poor boy's wishes. " _Papa's going to take you to the doctor's then we're going home, ok?"_

All he received was a small whine in acknowledgement before the sleepy head rested once more on his shoulder.

"Ano, Blackleg-san," Kari cut in and Sanji stood holding Leo and turned to face her. She held out a note to him. "Here is the address of the nearest late night children's clinic. If you'd like, I can call them to let them know you'll be coming?"

He smiled gratefully and took the note. "Thank you, Kari-chan. It would be most helpful."

The pair began to walk to the exit, Kari holding the door for them. "Ano, Blackleg-san," she started once more as he was putting on his shoes.

"Yes?" He acknowledged as he straightened up.

"Ano, if Leo-kun is sick tomorrow, I'm sorry, but we cannot take him in." She stuttered nervously. He could tell that she hated doing this to parents but rules were rules.

"I completely understand, Kari-chan." He assured. "I will have the day off tomorrow anyway, so Leo and I will be ok. But thank you for your reminder."

"Ah, no…not a problem." She murmured. "Well, goodnight then Blackleg-san." She looked over at the sleepy Leo. "Goodnight, Leo-kun. Get better, ok?" She ended sweetly.

Leo raised his head. " _Goodbye."_ He murmured in sleepy French.

Kari giggled and Sanji chuckled. "Leo, your teacher's Japanese. You must speak Japanese to sensei." He lightly reprimanded.

"Goodnight, sensei." He repeated.

"Goodnight, Leo-kun."

"Much better." Sanji praised before he bowed to the caretaker and left the building with one more wave.

Getting his sleepy little lion into the booster seat of the car was easily done and soon he was in the driver's seat, the clinic's address already programed into the GPS. He flicked his eyes up to the rear-view mirror to take in Leo's appearance. The little snuffly face buried into his favourite blue travel blankie made him smile sadly and he decidedly pushed all other thoughts from his mind. He had no time to waste on a love-life anymore. Leo was, and always would be his first priority.

* * *

He knew it would be hard to get the swordsman to agree to come, he didn't think it would be downright impossible.

"What's the worst that could happen, Zoro?" He sighed as he fixed his cowboy hat. "You want answers, don't you?"

The green haired man grunted and continued performing his sword strokes. "I think I've had enough surprises for now. I'm not super inclined to go after more. I need to focus." He said, continuing his movements seamlessly.

Ace rolled his eyes. Sure, Zoro needed focus, but right now he was just running away. He was about to say as much before he decided to bite his tongue. Really, it _was_ his fault that Zoro was so distraught right now, but honestly, wasn't the man curious at all? Wouldn't it just be better to _know_? He let out a heavy sigh and pasted a smile on his face. It was no good; if Zoro didn't want to go, he couldn't force him. It'd probably be bad to do that. Zoro would be too tense and probably wouldn't listen well at all.

"O-kay." He drawled as he put his hands in his pockets. "But, _I'm_ going to see him now. I want to know why he kept his family a secret from me."

Zoro stilled his movements.

"It's not my place to ask." He said softly.

Ace frowned. Damned Zeff. The man that stood before him now was usually so proud, usually stood so tall. Now he stood eyes downcast, defeated. Zeff had no right to say that to Zoro.

"You know you can-"

"It's not my place." Zoro reaffirmed, interrupting Ace. Zoro's eyes were hard. His gaze weighted as he continued. " _You_ can go and see him because _you_ are a friend." His voice dropped once more. " _I_ am just the ex." He paused a moment. "I don't want to see what she's like." He whispered. "I don't want to see how happy they are."

And fuck, if Ace didn't realise just how much he put his foot in his mouth.

Zoro was always sensitive about these things. As far as Luffy had told him, before Sanji, there was no one for Zoro. The man kept to himself. Lived alone with old man Koshiro. Nami used to joke that Zoro was a lone wolf that Luffy had somehow managed to train to stand humans; but it was all there. Zoro never cared for anyone as much as he had cared for Sanji. Yes, things got fucked up a few years ago, but they were both only human.

And here was Ace, once again, fucking things up. Making things hard for Zoro.

What was wrong with him?

He let out a breath. "I understand."

Zoro raised his head to meet his eyes. Ace held them for a moment hoping to convey all of his apologies.

"I understand," he repeated. "But I have to know."

There was a beat of silence before Zoro nodded his head and turned his attention to his swords. Ace didn't know if that was good or bad, but he'd accomplished what he'd come to do. If Zoro wasn't ready, he couldn't force him, but there was no way he was going to allow himself to live in ambiguity.

"I'll see you later." He called to Zoro with a soft smile. The answering wave before the swordsman picked up his stokes was his only response, but he'd grown used to Zoro's lack of words.

* * *

He vaguely remembered Ace calling out to him as he left about visiting, but he hadn't thought that the man meant today. It was just after two in the afternoon. Leo had been sleeping again since around twelve and the knock on the door startled him from his perusal of the latest addition of _the Art of Eating_. There was no way Zeff would knock. It was his own house. But he was surprised that anyone came around at this time of the day. No one was ever usually home around this time. Zeff and he lived very busy lives so unless it was ridiculously late at night, no one was ever here to answer the door. Hell, they had all their post sent to the Baratie's address so that at least _someone_ could sign for it. Fuck all the 'you weren't at home' memos, it was too damn annoying to try and arrange to be there when someone would deliver. The Baratie made that easy.

In any case, he put down the magazine and headed for the door. A peep through the peephole showed that it was Ace. Confused, he opened the door and moved aside to let the brunette in.

"Ace, what brings you by?" He asked as the other man shucked off his boots.

"Come on, Sanji." Ace smiled in a joking tone. "Your memory can't be _that_ bad! I told you yesterday that I'd swing by today." He continued as he padded into the living room.

"Ah, is _that_ what you were yelling about when I was leaving?" Sanji quipped smartly.

Ace turned and gave him a flat glare that was heavily softened with his playfulness.

"Yeah, but obviously you were too worried about your son to take note." He retorted. Sanji smirked in response.

"You know damn well." He said as he walked past his friend into the open kitchen. It took up most of the apartment, something he and Zeff wouldn't have any other way, even if the Baratie's kitchens were just downstairs. "Once you have a kid, come talk to me again about it. Drink?" He asked coming 'round the counter.

Ace strolled in after him and plonked himself on one of the barstools as the cook made his way to the fridge. "You got any of your famous yuzu-cha still, or is it all gone?"

Sanji squirrelled away a smile as he pulled out a jar full of yellow magic and went to fill up the kettle. "You're lucky the little lion was sick. Fresh batch." He said warmly.

The pyrotechnician grinned and rested on his elbows. "Little lion?" He asked.

"Leo." Sanji stated proudly.

"Leo, huh?" Ace murmured. "How's the little tyke? Flu? Cold?"

"Flu." The blond confirmed as he set down two cups. "Doc says he should be up and causing mayhem by the end of the week."

The brunette let out a chuckle. "Mayhem? Surely not. Gets it from his dad then, eh?" He watched as a loving smile unraveled on the blond's face.

"Ha, he's much more well behaved than I was as a kid, that's for sure." Sanji beamed. He then leaned in towards Ace and smirked. "But don't you let Zeff, know I said that. If he asks, I was the most damn perfect child any parent could ask for!"

The freckled man guffawed, it was just like Sanji to say that. The two of them shared a moment in laughter before Ace spoke.

"So, he gets it from his mother then, huh?"

Sanji's movements slowed a bit as be finished screwing the lid on the yuzu jar. The kettle sounded that it was finished and the blond seamlessly glided over to fill up their cups.

"I guess you could say that." He answered as he began to stir the golden substance into the water, his back towards his friend.

Ace's eyebrow rose. Really. Sanji was not going to start bragging? He would push a little more then.

"So where _is_ the missus then?"

"There is no missus." Sanji said flatly as he continued stirring. "Any sugar?" He asked as he turned to face his friend with the two steaming cups in hand.

Ace murmured his thanks and a quiet 'no' as Sanji handed one of the delicious smelling mugs to him then leant back against the cabinetry.

"So," Ace started, trying to remain casual. "Is she still in Paris then?"

Sanji quirked an eyebrow but still sipped at his tea. "What does it matter?" He countered.

Ace may have been a lot of dumb things, but he could take a hint when one was present. Sanji obviously didn't want to talk about it. Still. He wanted to push the envelope today. A whole month of seeing Sanji but not knowing about his family had him a little-tiny-smidgen miffed off. If Sanji was just embarrassed that he couldn't land the girl, it wasn't good enough to keep his life a secret from his friends. He wanted answers.

"It doesn't, really. Just curious." He threw out. Sanji simply hummed into his drink as if it were the end of the matter so he tried again. "I mean, I really thought I'd get to meet her is all. You know, the woman who got you to settle down and have a kid. You're not together anymore then?"

Sanji stood from resting on the bench and set down his cup, pulling out his smokes. His whole being looked agitated as he lit up and breathed in the toxic mix. Ace sat trying to remain casual. "Leo's mother is dead." The blond said finitely and Ace's eyes went wide. So much for pushing that damn envelope then. He'd really put his foot in it now. How many times in two days? Fuck.

"Oh, fuck. Oh, Sanji. Fuck, man. I'm sorry-"

"It's fine." Sanji exhaled. "It happens." He said taking another drag. A beat passed before he continued. "Leo still gets sad when she's mentioned, so don't."

Ace nodded and wiped a hand down his face. No more pushing shit today, _that_ was for sure. He was obviously not as good at interrogation as he'd thought. "Damn, Sanji. I'm such a fuck up."

The blond let out a huff of a hollow laugh before he answered. "You sure as hell are, ain't cha?" The freckled man raised his eyes catching piercing blue ones. With that shared look, and Sanji's usual superior smirk he knew all was forgiven, even if the blond's smile was a little shakey. Maybe some other time, when they'd gotten closer once more, he'd pry a little further but here was where he'd stop for today. He was just damned lucky Sanji was a nice guy and used to bullshit being thrown at him that he let this all slide. Even though Sanji's words made him burn with curiosity, Ace had learnt his lesson. Enough with the personal questions for now.

After that awkwardness had subsided the two began catching up what they had missed over the past four years. Ace steered clear of his feelings of abandonment. He wanted to enjoy this time with Sanji, later on he could share about how he felt when the blond cut all contact. It was obvious that resettling in Japan was no easy task for the Frenchman. He regaled Ace with tales of all the stupid Japanese bureaucracy he struggled though in getting Leo into daycare, let alone reinstating his own visa and proof of identification and now on top of all that, finding a new place. The blond confessed he wanted a place large enough for Leo to have his own room when older and also a spare one so that Zeff could come and stay with them as well. The old geezer had said it was pointless, he had this apartment above the Baratie afterall, but Sanji admitted that he loved seeing the way Zeff interacted with Leo and wanted a home where that could happen all the time. Watching the two of them gave him a sense of normalcy he had always thought he'd never acquire in life. Ace couldn't help the smile that spread across his face as Sanji modestly preened about his family and all the new adventures he'd shared with them.

It was midway through Sanji gushing about Leo's first words when the little man himself thumped down the stairs and padded into the kitchen.

" _Papa I'm hun-"_ The sleepy little blond cut off as he saw the stranger seating at the breakfast bar and quickly scooted around the bench to his dad's side, eyeing the dark-haired man cautiously. Both Sanji and Ace let out a laugh at his silly antics.

"What's that, little prince? Are you hungry?" Sanji smiled as he picked his soon to be four-year-old up. "First off, say hello to our guest. This is Ace, he's a friend of papa's."

The little blond pulled slightly away from his dad to look at the man with the beaming smile in front of him. He wasn't so scary now that he was in his papa's arms. "Hello, Ace-ojisan, I'm Leo." He said softly.

"Ah…ojisan…" Ace uttered in mock hurt. "Shouldn't it be oniisan?" He joked and Leo looked from Ace to Sanji and back again. "But if you're papa's friend then you're the same age… that makes him ojisan, right papa?" He asked curiously. Sanji tried to stifle his laughter and felt his heart overflowing. With his tussled bed head and quizzical look, Leo looked too damned adorable. Ace's outraged gasp in the background just was the icing on the cake as he answered his son.

"No, you're right, Leo." He said smiling as looked down at his genius boy. "Ace-ojisan just doesn't want to admit he's old. You were right; besides, Ace-ojisan is actually two years older than papa so he's _definitely_ an ojisan."

"Ojisan, ojisan, ojisan. How many times do you have to say it Sanji!" Ace cried melodramatically as he rested his head in his arms and began mock crying. "Leeeeeeo-kun." He whined. "Your papa is so mean to his friends. Be nice to this oniisan."

Leo let out a cute childish giggle as Sanji let him down on the floor. He quickly padded around the bench and over to the bar stool and rested a hand on his new uncle's leg. Ace whipped his head up dramatically as the little one spoke.

"It's ok Ace-ojisan. I like having many uncles!" He said confidently as he beamed up at the silly old man. Ace blinked twice before he scooped the young boy up and onto his lap smooshing their faces together as he began another dramatic tirade.

"Leo-kun is sooooo nice to ojisan!" He began and Leo went wild laughing, giggling about being tickled. "Ojisan will bring Leo lots of gifts, and take him to the zoo and spoil him so much that he'll be Leo's favourite, even more than papa!"

"No!" Leo called as he pushed away from Ace. "Papa is Leo's favourite!" Both adults stilled a moment and Ace smirked as he saw Sanji's light blush and proud look on his face concerning his son's words.

"O-kay then." Ace sing-songed. "Then Ace-ojisan will be Leo-kun's second favourite person."

"No." Leo spoke crossing his arms over his chest a little grumpy look on his face. " _Grand-père_ Zeff is Leo's second favourite. He makes me sushi!" This time, Sanji had a harder time stifling his chuckles and Ace put on the puppy dog eyes for Leo.

"Then third favourite?" He asked, batting his eyelashes looking as pathetic as he could.

Leo began to consider it, tilting his head and putting his hand on his chin. Both adults had to hold back gales of laughter at the move. It was so classically Zeff, that they found it hilarious. It was amazing that even after such a short time together, Leo was picking up so much of the old man's habits.

"Hmm. Ok. Leo doesn't have someone who's next favourite unless he counts Leo-junior so Ace-ojisan can be three."

"Can be third, Leo." Sanji corrected lightly as he took a sip of tea.

Ace let out a whoop and then went back to smothering a giggling Leo. Pulling apart to give the young boy a break he brushed blond hair from his face and asked. "Who's Leo-junior?"

"I'll show you!" Leo started excited and wiggled his way off his uncle's lap to run upstairs again. Not a minute later they heard little steps racing down the stairs.

"Slowly Leo!" Sanji called out and they heard the thuds slow down dramatically before restarting once they hit the first floor again. Not two seconds later a rather large plush lion was stuffed up again Ace's knee, hiding Leo almost completely.

"This is Leo-junior!" Leo called out from behind the soft toy. Ace and Sanji shared a look.

"Nice to meet you, Leo-junior." Ace said as he took one paw and began to shake it. Leo giggled and Sanji smiled.

"Leo, are you ready to eat? Papa will reheat some chicken and corn soup for you." A blond little head popped up from behind the plush and nodded vigorously. "Well ok then, put Leo-junior on the couch and go wash your hands."

As the two blonds headed out of the room Ace was left with a warm feeling in his heart. If this is what family life was like, he could see the appeal. Deciding to forget all about the 'whos' and 'what ifs' and other uncertainties in his messy relationships with Zoro and Sanji he straightened his cowboy hat and stood up from the bench. He'd deal with all those thoughts and feelings later. Right now, he wanted to enjoy his time with Sanji and Leo.

* * *

Uploaded 1st March 2018

Ok so here we go, chapter three! I hope it sheds a little more light on the characters and yes… a love triangle has been bubbling under the surface! Stay tuned to see where it goes. Thanks to all who favourited and followed! It's really nice getting an email showing how many people are interested, especially when you leave super kind reviews! Thanks a bunch! Also... hopefully I will have a little birthday fic for Sanji as tomorrow is his birthday :) Keep an eye out for it!

Raigon thanks for leaving your comment. It's nice to know people are reading and I love communicating through the reviews with you! I'm glad you like the mystery too! I don't like fics that give away too much too soon, but if you look through what I wrote…I've left subtle breadcrumbs… I hope they're not TOO obvious though!

Subaru's dreams thank you for your review as well! I'm glad you're along for the ride! I'm glad you're feeling all the ups and downs, I wanted to show the mental anguish that most people go through in these situations. It's not always such an easy fix and things like ego or overthinking things often get in the way. More about Sanji's past will come up later... I have a lot planned... just need to put pen to paper :) Thanks for the encouragement!


	4. Chapter Four

CHAPTER FOUR

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

He had felt that two days was enough to get this tension out of his system, but his katana strokes said otherwise. They were sloppy and distracted or too stiff and weak. He'd been meticulous about trying to get back into his rhythm but there was no helping it. He was completely and utterly messed up by this whole situation.

He decided to stop here for today. He wasn't improving, he was merely wasting energy which in its own way could be good, but right now was ineffectual. He sheathed his katana and went to put them in their cases. What he needed was a cold shower followed by a warm soak and then he could think about lunch.

It was midway through his soak that a familiar childish voice called out his name followed by his trademark 'hee hee hee'. The noises that followed could only be the opening and slamming of several of his sliding doors. He was probably gonna get another lecture from Usopp about the importance of locks. The man was always on him for never locking his door. To be honest, there weren't that many street thugs that could take him in a fight, but as he stepped out of the tub, he could see Ussop's point about the lock. It's damned uncomfortable to try find clothes _and_ grab your swords before confronting an intruder. He would have to be more careful in the future.

He had finished rubbing down with a towel and had just secured it around his waist before an exorbitantly excited Luffy slammed open the door and announced his arrival launching into his usual bearhug. Normally, Zoro would indulge the monkey in his friendly endeavor, but his training failures and being caught in the tub were wearing his patience thin so he simply extended an arm and caught Luffy's face in his palm, before deflecting the fool to the side.

"Zo-ro Naf far–" Luffy's garbled voice sounded behind Zoro's palm. Zoro made a face as the idiot slobbered all over his previously clean hand and sighed.

"Life's never fair, Luffy." He said with a sigh as he let go of his friend's face. He turned to stride out of the bathroom and to the bedroom to change. Luffy would no doubt follow if he wanted to say something, but he'd be damned if he stood around in the nude for whatever discussion the brunette had in mind.

He'd slipped on underwear and was just pulling on some pants when Luffy entered the bedroom.

"Why're you here, Luffy?" He asked as he rummaged for a shirt.

"I'm picking you up for lunch!" The brunette answered happily as he flopped on the queen bed.

Closing the draw, Zoro sent a skeptical look at his friend as he put on the shirt he'd taken out. "You're taking me for lunch?" He started quizzically. "What brought this on?"

Luffy smiled and rearranged the straw hat that sat on his head. Zoro grabbed some socks and sat on the bed next to his best friend.

"You need cheering up, Zoro." The brunette chirped and Zoro couldn't help but let out a dark chuckle. Boy did he ever, unfortunately, life was never that kind. The only thing that could make him happy would be for Sanji to get back together with him, but that wasn't happening. He had a kid. He was _married_ for heaven's sake.

"Yeah, Luffy." He murmured as he rubbed a hand down his face trying to stay away from those kind of thoughts. "Ok. Where were you thinking of going?"

The smaller man grinned at him. "The Baratie, of course!"

Zoro leveled him with the most deadpan look he could muster. "Not happening." He said. "Where else?"

Suddenly, the room got quiet as Luffy stopped bouncing and moved to stand directly in front of Zoro. "No. We're going to the Baratie."

Zoro looked up, unable to keep the shock off his face. Despite the ordering tone of the words, they had been said with such kindness and understanding. It was confusing the hell out of Zoro's mind. Luffy's stance wasn't mean, he wasn't being intimidating, he was acting almost like a mother. It was weird.

"Zoro." Luffy started, in a voice that was softer than he'd ever heard Luffy speak in. "You need to do this. You're a fighter and you need to fight."

"He has a _son_ , Luffy. A family." He stated blankly.

"So, what? You're saying because he has a kid, he can't love you?" Luffy said crossing his hands over his chest.

Zoro rolled his eyes and pulled on his other sock before glaring up at his friend's face. "I'm saying he can't be with me if he has a _wife_." He spat. Damned Luffy making him say out loud what he hadn't wanted to confront in the first place. Sanji was taken. That was the end of the story. Zoro had rested on his laurels and now he was paying the price. Someone else had seen and appreciated how fantastic Sanji was and now it was too late.

"Wife?" Luffy echoed. And Zoro grit his teeth. "Huh, you think he would have mentioned that to me. He told you, huh?" Luffy asked.

It was probably the way that the brunette spoke about it all so casually that irritated him but it made Zoro fall off his guard. "No." He muttered. "He didn't have to. He has a kid, he's–"

"–Zoro." Luffy barked and the older man stiffened at the tone. "Are you seriously telling me that _you_ of all people, just _assumed_ something?"

A moment of silence passed between them. Zoro had no answer.

"Because I _know_ how much you _hate_ it when people assume things about you, so I'm sure you wouldn't just jump to assumptions like that, right?"

Damn Luffy. His tactic was so obvious, and yet, so simple. He had jumped to conclusions rather than stick around to hear the actual truth. He'd grown into one of those adults that read into situations and refused to go further thinking they knew everything that would happen. They were the people Zoro had mocked as a teenager, the ones in the films that he and Sanji said were dumb because they were too scared to just _talk_ out their problems. But it _was_ scary. Zoro was afraid of being hurt more than he already had been and that was another reason to be annoyed at himself. Stupid Luffy pointing this out to him. Another beat of silence before Zoro finally broke.

"What do you want me to say, Luffy?" He sighed as he looked down at the carpet.

"Say you'll come to lunch with me. See Sanji. Talk with him properly. Don't assume anything." The younger man rested a hand on his beloved hat. "You've got nothing to lose Zoro, and everything to gain."

Zoro let out a deep sigh as he thought over his friend's words. Things were definitely bad when Luffy made logical sense. He was right though, there really wasn't that much to lose. He just had to be confident enough to try. The worst that could happen would be the same as the past four years and really, if Sanji _did_ really want to move on, perhaps it was for the best if what was left of his romantic feelings were crushed beyond all hope. He took another deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Fine, Luffy. You win. Let me get dressed?"

Luffy beamed at him brightly and clapped him on the shoulder. "I'm so looking forward to Sanji's cooking!" He grinned as he laughed.

For the first time that day, a genuine smile settled on the swordsman's face and he rest a hand over the one on his shoulder.

"Me too, Luffy. Me too."

The smaller man chuckled patted his shoulder and headed for the door. "Oh, and Zoro," He said stopping in the threshold. The man in question raised his head to meet his friend. "You're not wearing _that_ , are you?" He teased before running out into the living room away from Zoro's feral growls.

* * *

As the elaborately decorated doors closed behind him, Zoro let out a calming breath. He hadn't expected to be back so soon. To be honest, he was a little self-conscious of how needy he probably would look to the blond, but Luffy's words grounded him and he bolstered his spirit.

"Sanji!" In seconds, the brunette had left his side bounding over into the kitchen, the shouts that sounded from the closed doors showed that the chefs there weren't too happy with Luffy's unannounced blast into the kitchen. Zoro stood awkwardly at the entrance before he decided to at least wait by the bar for the idiot brunette so as not to look like a _complete_ loner. Sooner or later Luffy would be kicked out by the chefs and then they could see about getting seats. He hoped Sanji didn't mind him coming again. He sighed. He was frustrated with himself for getting so wrapped up in what the blond thought again. He was so lost in his never-ending battle in his mind that the gruff voice to his right startled him.

"Back again, huh, broccoli?"

Zoro whipped his head around to see Zeff's familiar face pinning him with an ascertaining look. The old man didn't look as pissed off as the last time they'd seen each other, but one could never be certain with the old seaman.

"Luffy brought me for lunch." He answered lamely as he sat down at the bar. It was true, but even to his ears it sounded like a thinly veiled excuse to see a certain long-legged chef. The old man just hummed, continuing to wipe the glass he'd been holding before putting it aside and grabbing a new one. Silence passed between the pair and Zoro inwardly cursed himself for sitting down and Luffy for leaving him alone in such an awkward situation. After half a minute, Zoro couldn't stand it, not with how things went down between them two nights ago.

"So…" He started, trying to sound casual as he fiddled with a paper coaster. "Is he happy with her?"

He deliberately kept his eyes away from Zeff. Sanji had always told him that he sucked at lying and needling for information and the blond had also complained a lot in their younger years about how Zeff seemed to always _know_ when Sanji was telling untruths. The quiet stretched for such a long time that Zoro felt the hairs on the back of his neck standing at attention. Why was he so jumpy about this? His mind flew through a million thoughts. At least one small comfort of Sanji kicking Zoro out of his life would be he wouldn't have to feel Zeff's intimidating gaze anymore. He had just caught up with that train of thought and wondered how the hell he'd gotten to that idea in that short amount of time when Zeff set down the glass he'd been wiping and spoke.

"I'll tell you this much, broccoli. There's no wife."

Zoro's head shot up and met Zeff's eyes. Did that mean he had a chance? What had happened to Sanji's partner? Were they not together anymore? Was it a one-night stand? How had Sanji ended up with the kid? Could Sanji still have feelings for him? Was there ho–

His deliberations were cut off when Zeff interjected again. His tone sharp, his voice commanding.

"But if you think of dragging him through hell again, there'll be hell on your doorstep, you hear me?"

Steel grey eyes held his own in a stare that promised a world of pain if his words weren't respected. Zoro found all he could do was nod in agreement, his words echoing through his skull. From any other person, that would have been a clear 'no chance, ever' but this was Zeff. That was as clear of a green light go ahead for a second chance at their relationship as he could hope from the old dog. Even when dating Sanji, the old man had never been particularly welcoming. It probably didn't help that he was usually just as stoic as the chef and they both saw Sanji as the most important person in their lives. Zoro had always felt that Zeff thought he was not good enough for his precious Sanji. But those words just now – that threat – was almost like a bright and shining welcome that he felt overwhelmed by emotion.

He was a little confused, Zeff's attitude a few days ago had been so contrary – almost a giant _fuck off and get away from my son_ – that he had expected the old chef to never accept him. Now he was giving him the go ahead. He must have shown his confusion on his face because the old man put down his dish towel and let out a weary sigh.

"I only want what's best for him and his kid." Zeff said in a low voice keeping the conversation away from the prying ears of other patrons. "If you don't think you can be there for the _both_ of them, don't even bother trying. I promise I will give you back twice as much pain as you cause for either of them."

Zoro felt himself nod. There was no way he wanted to hurt anyone. He felt his nod wasn't sufficient so decided to put it into words.

"There's no way I want that." He said just as softly. "I've learnt my lesson already. I don't want to go through that again. I won't do that to him again either."

Zeff just hummed and left it at that. The two waded in companionable silence. Zoro soaking in the knowledge that he had Zeff's blessing to try again, Zeff subtly observing the stupid broccoli whose emotions were written plain on his face. The stillness didn't last long though because Luffy came crashing through the doors once more, a pissed off Sanji on his tail.

"I can't believe you just burst in there! You're not a chef! You're not even a customer, you shouldn't even _be_ back there!" The stupid little monkey just laughed his trademark 'hee hee hee' ignoring all of the blond's reprimands. Zoro looked up at the scene and smiled at the ticked off blond. This was just like the old days. Sanji would pretend to be pissed off at the manner-less actions of Zoro and their friends, but really he was just a big softy, a giant mother hen to the whole gang. He loved taking care of people and Zoro really knew so many people that needed taking care of. Exhibit A – Luffy.

Currently the lanky lad was being scolded by Zeff and the cook but he couldn't care less. Zoro hid a smile behind the palm of his hand. It really looked like a boy being told off by his grandfather and mother. The cook would be super pissed if he voiced that, so he kept that tidbit to himself deciding to tune back into the actual conversation.

"–that's why I said, we're going over to _your_ place for lunch!" Every nerve in Zoro's body stood at attention. Had he heard Luffy correctly? Did the little ball of energy just say they'd be going _upstairs_ for lunch? This was not what he'd signed up for. He wasn't ready for that. He'd only just got himself in the headspace where Zeff accepted his attempt to pursue his son. He just found out Sanji didn't have a wife. It didn't mean he wasn't in love with the woman who had his son. Zoro had always heard that foreign girls were a lot more promiscuous than Japanese girls. It seemed like a lie, but what if it were true? What if she simply didn't want to be _married?_ What if Sanji actually _loved_ her?

"–you just can't _invite yourself_ over!"

Worse, what if Sanji's son decided that he _hated_ him? What would he do if the kid was adamant about having his mother or no one? How could Zoro compete with that?

"–great idea. Eggplant, get his stupid egghead out of here and take the broccoli too while you're at it. Leo'll be waking up soon. I didn't come down here for nothing. Stop making excuses and get your ass up there!"

"Fine. Are you coming Zoro?"

At the sound of his name, his head snapped up from his thoughts and he locked eyes with Sanji. The man gave a quirk of an eyebrow at the lack of reaction before Zoro's brain finally caught up with the conversation and he nodded and stood from the barstool.

"Great. Come on you moochers." The blond turned and walked behind the bar and into the staff area. Luffy and Zoro followed suit. Many years of friendship had given them all free back stage passes in the bar area to the stairs that led up to the condo above the Baratie. For Zoro, it was almost surreal. How many times had he followed the blond up this same climb to spend the evening in each other's arms much to Zeff's distaste.

He let loose a soft chuckle as he remembered his first visit to the father and son's abode. Sanji's shift had just finished and he had invited a slightly buzzed Zoro upstairs. He remembered Zeff's piercing glare as the two walked through the bar area, the small thrill of adrenaline of being on the 'staff side' of the bar. He remembered watching long legs look even longer as the blond climbed the steps before him. Zoro recalled watching that tight ass sashay his way up and the soft voice the cook had used when he realised Zoro still stood at the foot of the stairs instead of following him up. He felt the phantom beating of his heart as he pounded up the stairs and offered a nervous grin to the blond who gave him a look of confusion before unlocking and opening the door.

The two of them had awkwardly shuffled around the place for a minute, all too hyper aware of each other's presence in this more secluded space. They'd sat on the couch, picked what movie they wanted to watch. Sanji had gone to make popcorn and bring drinks. Zoro had jokingly commented on Zeff's death glare and Sanji had been so adorably oblivious to the whole matter and Zoro laughed good-naturedly when they finally settled down together and got to watching the film. It was near the end when Zeff's keys rattled in the door and the two of them looked up from the couch to greet him as he entered.

Zeff had shot another intense glower at him and Zoro had felt his skin crawl. He was suddenly all too aware of how Sanji and he were seated. The blond was sprawled all over him practically using Zoro as a mattress. Blond hair was pressed up against the kendo champ's neck and Zoro's right arm was wrapped around bony shoulders. Sanji was cuddling Zoro with no restraint. He remembered Zeff's eyes narrow as he saw this and the spike of fear that ran up his spine at the deadly gaze. The old man had shuffled his way into the kitchen and Zoro had finally plucked up the courage to ask Sanji if his father was against being gay or something of the like.

Sanji had been so innocently confused by the question, it seemed to come out of the blue for him. It was at that moment that Zoro realised Sanji was completely oblivious to the power play Zeff initiated between the old chef and himself and he remembered smiling sweetly down at him and bestowing a kiss on a confused, but welcoming, blond's lips. When the room dropped several degrees, he'd had enough mind to pull away and keep the rest of the night painstakingly PG for Zeff's benefit. It seemed that the old man was really not used to seeing his son in a relationship and it was then that Zoro realised he'd need to convince the old man that he was good enough for the hot blond. Zeff had never made it easy though.

Luffy's excited chatter brought his mind back to the present.

"Oi, Luffy." Sanji started quietly as the energetic brunette practically bounced into the kitchen. "Leo is still resting, so pipe down a bit."

Luffy managed to calm down and sat on one of the bar stools, Zoro decided to follow suit. Sanji prepared some glasses of water

"Is that his name, Leo?" The smaller man asked a wide grin on his face. "It's a great name!" Zoro caught Sanji's proud smile and his heart fluttered.

Sanji looked just like a father.

Well. He _was_ a father. He knew that, but in this moment, it was like it finally sunk in. For some reason though, that soft smile on Sanji's face didn't make him feel inadequate, or unloved. In fact, for once, Zoro could distance himself from Sanji's actions and saw that soft smile, that swell of paternal pride for what it was – a father who was so proud of his own son. Inexplicably, it was extremely attractive to Zoro. He couldn't put his finger on why, but all the same, Sanji how he was now, was strikingly gorgeous.

"–too small. I want Leo to have some more space, maybe a backyard, I don't know. The apartment's nice but when he's older, it'll be cramped for the three of us."

Zoro zoned back in hearing the patter of tiny feet on wooden floors. He turned to the door just in time to see a shock of blond hair come hurling 'round the corner only to squeak and jump back. Sanji's throaty laugh was quick to follow.

" _Come in, Little Lion. You can't keep being scared of new people. Come meet papa's friends."_ Sanji called softly.

Zoro sucked in a breath at the familiar sound of French lilting off his ex's tongue. It had been one of his favourite things. Sanji's voice in his mother tongue. Sanji's Japanese was so fluent that he'd often forget that it was his fourth language. Back in university, it was one of the many things that attracted a flock of girls to his side, so Zoro hated that he too was swooned by the language of love. He'd spent many nights head resting in Sanji's lap, long lithe fingers stroking through his hair as Sanji whispered unknown words in soft sultry French. He'd forgotten how much he'd loved that.

Zoro watched as the little blond chattered quickly as he ran to his father's side. Zoro couldn't understand what he was saying but the chirruping lilt of the little boy's voice brought a soft smile to his face. Once the little one reached his _papa_ , he was lifted by strong arms and set on the cook's hip and Zoro finally got a good look at his face as Sanji swung him round to meet their gaze. Zoro let out a huff of air as he took in the similarities. Really, Leo looked almost the spitting image of Sanji. Same cherubic face, impossibly large bright blue eyes soft silky strands of golden hair, perhaps only a shade or so darker than Sanji's own. The two were crazily similar and Zoro was struck with one thought.

There's no way they _couldn't_ be related.

They looked too impossibly alike to be anything other than father and son. It was like looking into a mirror that showed Sanji's childhood. Zoro smiled as he noticed the ever so slight start of a curly brow forming. This kid was so darn adorable.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Leo. Please take care of me." The little blond called from his father's arms. Luffy gave his usual laugh along with a 'me too, I'm Luffy!' And the two chattered away for a while before big blue jewels were turned on him and he gave his most welcoming smile.

"Nice to meet you, Leo. I'm Zoro. I hope we get along well." He'd be lying if he said he wasn't nervous. He was actually completely filled with mortification at the thought of scaring the little bite so much that Sanji would avoid him. But the kid just beamed back at him and wrapped his arms around his father's neck chittering in a burst of French.

" _Vraiment_? _Leo,_ you cannot keep going back to French. You need to learn to speak Japanese when we have guests. When it's just you, me and _grand-père,_ French is ok, but not with guest, _d'accord, mon petit chou?"_

Luffy chuckled loudly. "You say that Sanji but look who's also speaking French!"

His giggles were infectious and quickly he had Leo onside laughing at his silly papa. Sanji's face was the perfect amount of sheepish and embarrassed but he chuckled softly alongside his son and friend. Zoro joined in with his usual smirk of a grin. Just like Sanji to catch himself in his own words.

"Ok then." Sanji said settling his son on the tiled floor opting for a segue to a new conversation. "What do we want for lunch?" The question was thrown out there for them all and in two seconds flat both Luffy and Leo were giddily bubbling with excitement shouting their favourite dishes before Luffy began a chorus of 'Feast! Feast! Feast!' that spurred little Leo to catch onto the chant and shout along. Sanji rolled his eyes and tossed his head, flicking the hair from his eyes for a brief moment. It was one of those things he did when he was being dramatic and Zoro loved every second of it. The blond just looked so ridiculously _good._ It was like he was born to be a model if he wasn't so amazing at cooking.

"What in heaven's name will I do with the both of you! A feast? Ok then, but it'll take some time. Leo, why don't you take Luffy-ojisan and Zoro-ojisan to the living room and show them how you play piano? Put on a concert!" Sanji suggested. At the word 'concert' the young boy's ears had perked up and a beaming smile stretched across his face. He wasted no time running around the bench to reach at Zoro and Luffy's hands tugging them earnestly to follow him into the next room. Zoro's bewildered face brought a chuckle out of the cool blond. The swordsman only had a moment to look back at the smirking chef quizzically before the tiny pianist had coerced him off his seat and began pulling with a surprising amount of force for a teeny kid.

Zoro sat through three songs before Luffy decided he too wanted to play and had Leo start teaching him _'Frère Jacques'_. After listening to Luffy fail epically for a minute, he stood up from the 'audience seats' and moved towards the mantlepiece. Strewn along the top were an array of photographs. A soft smile unfurled on his face as he caught sight of familiar pictures. When he had been dating Sanji, these same photos were up, though he noticed a few new additions. A slightly more modern frame held a depiction of what must have been baby Leo. The kid looked only a few hours old at most, it was obviously taken just after the birth. The kendo teacher scanned the rest for any other add-ons. There was one of a toddler Leo in a swing set with Sanji behind him. It was a beautiful photo. Leo's eyes were full of excitement and Sanji looked like he was having the time of his life. He wished he could have been a part of that.

It was that thought that made Zoro realise that with Sanji in the shot, someone else must have taken it. Zeff hadn't gone to France at all in the past four years and the bitter feeling of realisation suddenly sunk to the bottom of Zoro's stomach.

It was obvious who had taken the picture. Leo's mother. Who else? The more rational side of his brain scolded him saying that Sanji could have had a friend do it or any other random person off the street for that matter, but it didn't stop that one nagging thought to continue. Zeff said there was no wife, but that didn't mean that Sanji didn't _want_ a wife. Hell, there must have been a reason Sanji had stayed in France for this long without returning. The more he thought about it the more unsure he became. If Sanji had fallen in love with the woman who was Leo's mother, he naturally would have tried to be with her. It was so crazy to his mind that someone _wouldn't_ want Sanji, but it could happen. Leo was obviously around three or four, so why had Sanji taken so long to return to Tokyo if he planned on raising him here? Probably, Sanji had been trying to convince Leo's mother to be a part of their lives here and after four years he'd finally realised it wasn't enough. He was ripped out of his thoughts by a persistent tugging on his pantleg.

"Zoro! Come play!" Leo beamed. The man in question blinked down, completely phased from being torn away from his mind's ramblings.

"Uh, yeah…sure kid." He managed to pull together and offered a weak smile at the sunny blond. Leo didn't seem to mind and just tugged him all the more over to an overflowing toybox. Zoro glanced around and saw that Luffy had abandoned him with the little guy, soft laughs from the kitchen told him that the brunette was in there with the blond, no doubt there'd be cursing and yelling soon as Luffy tried to steal a bite…or ten. He had a second to regain his balance as Leo sharply tugged him down to the floor. Really, the kid didn't know his own strength. For such a thin body, he sure had some muscle.

"You can pick which one you want and we'll build a castle to live in!" Leo exclaimed excitedly holding out three lego men dressed in different attire. The business man looked boring and the construction guy was obviously missing a hat of sorts, but the ninja looked pretty intact.

"Which do _you_ want, Leo?" He asked.

The kid paused a moment looking between his figures, his eyes lingering on his ninja. "Papa says let guests choose first." He replied holding them out all the more. Zoro let out a soft smile. Just like Sanji to instill manners in his kid even one so young.

"Well then, I'll be the construction guy. I'm good at building." Zoro looked over to see Leo absolutely beaming with happiness. He set to work dumping out all his lego bricks over the floor in one fell swipe, the noise made Zoro cringe at the volume before he pushed a fair few over to his new playmate.

"Then, I'll be the ninja and we'll protect the castle together!"

Zoro couldn't stop the smile unravelling on his face. The two worked together mostly in silence with some chit chat thrown in. When Zoro began making ridges on the curtain wall, Leo thought it was 'sooooo coooool' and begun working his way around the top adding the extra pieces. Feeling appreciated, Zoro went on to create some turrets as well to attach to their masterpiece. With each new addition, Leo's praises got louder and more excited and Zoro's smile became looser.

It wasn't long before they'd finished their creation and were admiring it together. Leo circled their fortress obviously pleased with the craftsmanship before he grabbed the two lego figures and plonked himself on Zoro's lap. Zoro dazedly took the construction worker lego man that was thrust under his nose as the little boy seated in his lap babbled on cheerfully about how their game would work creating intricate plotlines that went in one ear and out the other. Sensing a lack of attention from the green haired man, Leo's head swiveled up, neck arching as he looked at the tall man upside down.

"Zoro! You listening?" He pouted.

A brief moment passed as Zoro took in this new feeling. The sense of trust that was unashamedly displayed by this small child made his heart swell. His hopeful blue eyes stirred a protective force within him. He grinned down at the ridiculous face of this upside down pouting child.

"Yeah," he said softly. "I'm listening."

Twinkling eyes glistened as Leo giggled and rolled his head back further to push into Zoro's chest. A soft chuckle left the swordsman's lips and he impulsively grabbed the little bugger and leant back, lying on his back as he held the wriggling kid up in the air. Squeals of delight echoed around the room and Zoro brought the kid back down to his chest and began mercilessly tickling the little lion. After a minute, he let up and the kid flopped bonelessly over him, face flushed with a massive grin. Three seconds later chubby hands made a poor attempt at their own tickle torture and Zoro smirked.

"You're gonna have to better than that, kid." He taunted lightly. "I'm not ticklish at all."

Golden hair flopped over an eye as Leo pouted and tried to continue his tickling to no avail. Soon he tired and gave up but plonked on top of Zoro his pudgy fingers poking at the green head's cheeks.

"No fair, Zoro!" He whined halfheartedly as he continued his prodding. The kid stopped and let out a very Zeff like 'ah well' sigh.

"I like you, Zoro." He grinned before resting his head on the broad chest below him.

Zoro's heart fluttered.

"I like you too, Leo." He replied.

He'd never been this close with a kid before. Sure, he taught classes full of kids and of course he wasn't _always_ strict, but being a teacher required a certain level of professionalism. It wasn't like he had many friends with kids either and he wasn't exactly the first person someone thought of when they needed babysitting. Though, Leo's quick and natural acceptance of him and his personality was super refreshing. He'd forgotten how nice kids could be – humans who held so little prejudice, who could love and live openly, not caring about status or stereotypes or political correctness. He brought a hand up to rest on the boy's small back. If this was what it was like having a kid, he could see the appeal. The blond snuggled into his chest for a while before pushing off and staring him right in the eyes.

"Zoro, let's play now!" He called. Zoro smiled as he sat up, Leo giggling as he slipped into the elder's lap.

"Sure, kiddo." He hummed. The boy picked up the two figures he'd dropped and started placing them in the castle. Zoro watched on with a soft grin. Yep, he definitely saw the appeal. He hoped Leo liked him as much as he did the kid, because he now knew one thing with certainty. Sanji having a kid was not a minus or a flaw in any way shape or form. Leo was an amazing kid and Zoro could see himself coming to care for the boy as if he were his own. Just twenty minutes with the munchkin and he'd already stolen Zoro's heart, just like his papa.

* * *

Uploaded on 15th March 2018

Chapter four for you all! Thanks for reading along :)

Shout out to Subaru's dreams and Raigon for your reviews! Thanks a bunch!

Subaru's dreams... Yes I intend to play mean... I'll say this much, Sanji's not a push over and he's a pretty damn smart character in the OG series too. Zoro has a lot of convincing to do... I'm curious about your predictions and Sanji/Leo's mother thoughts. I have a lot planned out and tonnes of backstory in my mind as well, so I'm pretty curious about how my writing portrays character relationships to my readers... Thanks for leaving your comment!

Raigon I'm glad you liked the Leo-Ace interactions... how's about the Leo-Zoro ones? No worries about the breadcrumbs, they're just there if people are curious ;P Also because I like it when authors leave hints along the way that I look back on and be like 'OH! I should have realised at THIS moment...' yup, more so for me and my writing style. (And trying to get better at it!) Thanks for your review!


	5. Chapter Five

CHAPTER FIVE

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

He had plans with a certain pyromaniac for seven, it was nearing eight now and he was starting to lose his patience. An irritated hand ruffled through his blond locks. He checked his phone for the umpteenth time but no new messages or missed calls were registered.

"Fucking asshole." He muttered into his drink. He could have spent the evening upstairs pouring over the latest Michel Bussi thriller but no. He looked like a loner drinking in the Baratie bar by himself.

"Who's a fucking asshole?" A teasing voice whispered by his ear and he swiveled around fast, death glare at the ready and locked onto a sheepish looking brunette. The man in question saw his angry rant about to spill out and spoke before the tirade could begin.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm late! Koutaro had trouble with his seven thirty show tonight and I had to stick around to sort shit out for him and when I got to the car I realised my phone had died. Don't kill me!" He ended dramatically, stretching out an arm in defense as if Sanji were about to hit him. The blond just rolled his eyes and flipped around to face the bar again.

"You fucking could have sent a text or something when it charged up a little. What, you don't have a charger in your car?" He spat out more for the act of being angry than any real irritation.

"Lent it to Luffy last week. Still haven't gotten it back yet." Ace quipped as he took the seat next to his friend. "Sorry." He apologized once more, his sincerity coming across. The blond let out a soft hum. It was the closest that Ace would get to a 'it's fine'. Sanji hated to be kept waiting, a trait he had inherited from his own old man. His lack of patience -which applied to men only- had been notoriously known campus-wide in their university days and it seemed the trait still persisted on till this day.

"So then, how was work?" Sanji started casually as he took another sip of his merlot. Ace shucked off his jacket resting it on the next seat and nodded to the bartender. Mike returned the gesture and started preparing the usual whiskey the young man drank.

"Eh, can't complain." Ace replied. "New Years is always the busiest and of course, summer too, so it's kind of nice having a bit more down time now."

The conversation flowed casually from there to whatever topics came to their minds. They drank, the smoked and both friends relaxed into the friendly atmosphere, the nice feeling that came with spending hours in each other's company. However, that nice fuzzy feeling was muddied by an innocent question.

"So, on Thursday Luffy and the gang are planning drinks at one of Robin's bars, _Hana._ They all want to catch up. You should come. They're all dying to see you." The blond chuckled into his drink before he exhaled the last of his cigarette and crushed the stub.

"Nah, I think not. You lot were always more Zoro's friends than mine." The sentence dropped the conversation between them into complete silence. Ace felt as if he'd been physically slapped by the words of the younger man. Was that how Sanji had seen their friendship all this time? Had he always felt that he was just Zoro's plus one? Finally, he brought himself to reply.

"That hurts, you know." He muttered under his breath. He wasn't sure if he wanted Sanji to hear him or not, but the wide eye look of surprise from the blond gave him some sort of conviction to continue so he decided to elaborate, his anger fueling him on. "You know, _I_ at least thought we were good friends. Zoro was never part of the equation for me concerning our friendship. Did you just play friendly with us because you were Zoro's boyfriend? Because I thought we were friends because we actually liked each other." By the end of the rant, the words were practically spat out and he inwardly cringed at the accusing tone but he refused to look at the cook knowing that he probably had that same shocked and slightly sad expression on his face. Ace would forgive him too easily if he saw it, so he kept his eyes trained on his drink.

"Ace…" Sanji whispered and the fire-tamer could hear just how remorseful that voice was, but he wasn't just going to shrug it off and forgive things. Perhaps holding back his feelings of abandonment was becoming too much. Right now, Ace wanted Sanji to realise just how hurt he was the past four years. He wanted Sanji to know that what he had done was horrible, he wanted Sanji to see this and acknowledge it. He wanted Sanji to apologise for it. These past couple weeks he'd been focusing on Zoro and his pain, tonight, he wanted Sanji to recognize how much he had hurt him when he left and cut all contact.

"Ace…I'm sorry. I really thought of us as friends too. It's just…" The blond threaded fingers through his hair obscuring his face from view as he continued. "I felt like I couldn't complain about Zoro to you guys. I mean, you all knew him way before you knew me and…I just didn't want to be that whiny boyfriend that complained about his partner to his friends. Fuck, there's so much more history between all of you, that sometime, I couldn't help it. I felt like a bit of an outsider. Like the fucking trophy foreigner that never had the same childhood experiences as you all." He paused letting out a soft growl. "I can't help it. The shit I lived through, the culture that I was raised in, it's completely different here in Japan and a lot of the time, there were these major things that I just didn't get because…well, fucking culture. Some of it –Japanese culture, I mean– pissed me off, then some of it, I was pissed off because back in France I never experienced it and it looked…nice." Sanji fumbled around for another cigarette finally getting one and flicking his lighter a couple times to get the flame going.

"I still feel that way," he said in a low voice after taking a drag. "It's not that I don't want to be friends…it's just, I'm not sure how to be. Like I said, Zoro knew you all first…it feels like… I don't know… cheating or something. Stealing away your ex's friends...who does that?" He ended as he raised the cigarette to his lips once more. Ace wasn't sure if he was finished yet, so he held his tongue. He didn't want to interrupt the cook. Sanji had only ever been this candid with his emotions when he had broken up with Zoro. If there was one thing Ace held himself responsible for, it was for not listening back then. He would listen now. Smoke trailed sexily in the air as the blond release the toxins from his system. The way his hands were held so rigid told testament of the nervousness growing within him. Still, Sanji went on.

"To be honest," Sanji breathed out, letting the smoke curl once more as it tried to reach the ceiling. "It's one of the reasons I wanted Leo to come here while he was young. The culture thing I mean." He clarified. "France is actually great, I love it and all, but if Zeff is adamant about staying here, then I still want to be here too." He took a breath as if to speak, then as if he thought better of it, he took a drag. When he exhaled he went on. "…but if Leo was going to grow up here, I wanted to at least give him a fighting chance at not being the 'French freak' like I had to be." It was probably the alcohol mixed with his defensive attitude, but despite his friend's heartfelt words, Ace couldn't help the splutter of disbelief that left him.

"Are you fucking with me? You, the university hottie, winner of the _Mr. Toudai_ award all three years you were enrolled… _you_ had fucking problems here?" It was unbelievable, for as long as Ace had known him, Sanji had been the center of unbridled attention. Every girl was throwing themselves to have a chance at the blond foreigner. There was no shortage of girls hoping for a relationship or at least one night.

"Fucking, yeah. You have a problem with that?" Sanji spat his hackles risen in defense. It was testament of their friendship that Ace didn't end up with a shoe print on his stomach. Ace let a small smile unfurl as he realised how he'd ruffled the cook's feathers and the younger man was irritated but ok with it. Sanji took another drag and let the smoke out slowing. When he spoke, his voice was calmer. "High school wasn't exactly a fun place to be you know. I'm sure you saw it in your own school. The fucking overt bullying that went on and teachers that did nothing for it. It didn't matter how good I spoke Japanese, I would never _be_ Japanese because of my looks. Hell, I didn't have half the same experiences as you lot, with probably the exception of Brook and he'd lived army base life here for most of his life so at least there was that for him... Anyway, in high school it just made me all the more weirder. Once the novelty of being new wears of, you find that people are less tolerant of your ignorance and just start hating you."

A moment passed before Ace spoke. "You never said anything before."

Sanji let out a wry smile. "It's not something I like talking about. I didn't want to keep that with me all the time even though it sometimes pops up. Besides, I had told the one person who I thought mattered." He let his sentence trail off and took a drink. When he finished, he let out a loud sigh. "Though maybe I should have told someone else, I could have had someone to vent to, but it's all in the past and nothing can change it. I've got no use for 'what ifs'."

"You might not. But it doesn't change the fact that we all loved you and you disappeared on us." Ace turned to face Sanji. "It doesn't change the fact that right now, we all want to reconnect with you. It doesn't change the fact that we all see you as a dear friend."

Ace took a breath and went on. "I'm sorry you had to go through that in high school. I guess, sometimes I forget that it can be hard for you in Japan… because to me, it's like you belong here… I'm sorry I wasn't a good friend either… that you didn't feel like you could talk to me, complain to me… but I want to do that now, Sanji. I'm here now. It seems like a lot happened in France with you…" The fire-tamer watched as his friend stiffened beside him, a classic act of _don't ask_ that was oh so Sanji, so he pressed on, skipping over it for now. "You don't have to tell me what went on, but I hope that someday you'll feel like you _can_ and I'll be there, to lend an ear or give advice, whatever you want. You're still a friend to me, and to them. So, you should come and rekindle with them all." He ended. Ace watched as Sanji exhaled his cigarette smoke, then slid his eyes to glance at him.

"It's been so fucking long, Ace." Sanji murmured and a small smile broke out on the young freckled man's face.

"All the more reason to talk sooner rather than later." Ace encouraged. Sanji's hand filtered through his hair again showing his nerves. "We're all excited about it and waiting for it." Ace paused a moment to let his next sentence sink in. "You're not planning on disappointing Nami and Robin are you?"

Sanji crushed the remains of his cigarette in the ash tray. "No, I guess I'm not." Sanji conceded. He didn't seem at all enthusiastic about it, in fact, he rather seemed to be downright dreading it but Ace counted this as a victory.

"Good!" He beamed and ordered another round for the two of them. Convincing Sanji to come had been the hard part, now all he had to do was make sure that the cook enjoyed himself that night.

* * *

The redhead smiled as the colourful cocktail was slid in front of her.

"One Blue Margarita, for the pretty lady." The Brazilian bartender added flashing perfect pearly whites as Nami smirked and lifted her drink to her lips.

"Always the charmer, Roberto." Came a smooth sultry alto voice to her left. Nami turned her head as she set down her drink.

"As always, for friends of the owner." Roberto joked sharing in a secret smile with Robin. "The usual, for you today, Owner–san?" He asked.

Robin nodded "Gracias, Roberto." Before turning to Nami and greeting her friend while sitting down. "Glad you could make it, Nami." She said with a smile.

Nami rolled her eyes taking another large gulp of her drink. "As if I'd miss this!" She exclaimed. "Accounting is the devils work and I'm so over it. By Thursday, I _need_ a break!" Same old, same old. Nami had been wanting out of the business for years now. The pair shared a small laugh before she continued. "Besides, you said that Ace got Sanji to come. Can you believe him? Back in Japan for two months and _no_ contact at all with us! The dog!"

"Owner–san, your Moscatini." Roberto interjected lightly before placing down the beautiful drink. Robin nodded her thanks.

"Ah, Roberto! An Absinthe Hemingway, if you please!" Called Nami.

"Right away seňorita."

"But seriously, Robin." Nami gushed. "I heard he has a kid! And _no ring_. That pretty much _confirms_ that he's not bi, but gay, right? Just like I always said! I mean I guess he tried with a woman since he has a kid and all, but _Sanji_ not getting married if he knocked up a girl? Totally gay! But still, what the hell has been happening in his life? You heard anything?"

Robin smiled indulgently at the younger woman even if it _was_ a little strained. Nami was always the type to get hung up on gossip but it was one of the things that made her Nami. Their group indulged her, perhaps a little too much but it was almost too late now to fix it.

"I heard Ace knew he was back for a lot longer but didn't inform anyone–"

"–I KNOW! Can you believe it? Sly dog! You _know_ he's had a thing for Sanji for quite some time, do you think he still does?

"–Your Absinthe Hemingway."

Nami beamed at the hot bartender. "Thank you, Roberto! Robin's tab, right?" She grinned as she practically downed half the drink. To his credit, the Brazilian kept a polite smile on his face as he surreptitiously turned to the owner for a response. Robin simply chuckled lightly and nodded in confirmation.

"Si, seňorita," He replied smoothly and excused himself to keep preparing for the official opening time.

"But seriously, Robin. What do you think about Sanji being back? Honestly after the first year I expected him to never return even though Zoro–" She cut herself off abruptly though the intended message was clear. Everyone in their group knew how much hope the swordsman had held out that Sanji would someday return. Truth be told, all of them had given up along the way. Zoro had never outrightly admitted as much, but his recent steadiness that had settled over him over the past year had been taken by the group as Zoro's way of finally moving on with his life. There was much that Robin _could_ say, but she kept her thoughts to herself.

"It is quite a shock to the system, is it not?" She said instead, instigating a slurry of gossip to fall from Nami's lips.

Robin wasn't one to jump to conclusions before she had the facts. So far, the amount of data in her possession was insufficient to make a conclusion. Sadly, she also was not around during the time Sanji had left for good so she had little first-hand knowledge of the events that led to the breakup. She had been in England studying at the British Museum under Director Hartwig Fischer, no less. It had been an amazing time for her getting caught up in the new culture.

She'd always felt a little odd in Japan. Her dry wit was not seen as entirely desirable in the land of the rising sun. Most regular people criticized her wayward way of thinking if not by words, then by their actions. She only ever received praise from professors, and even then, there was a slight warning to conform to Japan's ideals in presentation and performance. And always, _always,_ the deep rooted misogynistic behavior she had to deal with. It was frustrating and stifling.

It was no wonder she had clicked with Sanji almost immediately when meeting him in university. He was the exciting French foreigner on exchange, as the rumour around campus had put it. Apparently, he had come to Japan to study the Japanese language alongside Japanese cuisine, though, upon further investigation, she realised he had been living in Japan since the age of fifteen and was in fact already quite fluent in the language. It was something that seemed to slip past most peoples' eyes, but Robin was observant and noticed the ever so slight traces of irritancy Sanji let slip when people complemented him on his amazing command of Japanese for _'being here such a short time'._ She had quickly identified that polite cringing silence as the same she herself carried out whenever her abilities were called into question simply because of her gender.

Sanji had quickly become a likeminded comrade who grumbled about the Japanese system. It was an ironic relationship; they both loved and hated Japan and the pair had spent much time together debating the pros and cons of the Japanese lifestyle and mentality. Sanji explained to her the nature of things back in France and brief descriptions of other countries within Europe in a less detailed manner. He was a big part of the reason why she had applied for a year's study overseas. The way in which Sanji spoke of the world was so foreign to her, and yet, so familiar. It was as if he were confirming her own beliefs that up till now, she had been carrying alone. Sanji had been an amazing pillar of support for her, reassuring her that she wasn't being _selfish,_ that her goals for her education _were_ her choice, that she didn't have to fit into the classic _female role_ Japan or society expected of her. He had probably seen her at her darkest moments of self-doubt and he reached out a hand and pulled her up. She had entered Tokyo University intending to take up the chance at one of their exchanges, but after meeting Sanji, she became convinced she had to.

Not for the first time, she felt irritated at herself for being halfway round the world when two of her dearest friends were going through hardships. Even though logically she knew it couldn't be helped –that it really wasn't any of her business how Sanji and Zoro's relationship worked out– that she wasn't _in_ their relationship and that it was _their_ issues to sort out, she still felt guilt of not being there for Sanji. She had been so wrapped up in her exciting new life in England that she barely kept contact with her friends in Japan. It was thrilling being among so many like minded people. There were so many amazing new role models and interestingly fresh adventures to have. But hearing over the phone from Franky that the amazing duo had broken up and Sanji had returned to France for good, was a shock to her system.

She had asked the others to let her know where he was and how to get in contact. She lived in London, it was a simple matter of taking a train on the Channel Tunnel and she'd be there in just over two hours. Sadly, none of the others could get in contact with Sanji and it seemed only Zeff knew of his location and well-being. She had called him up personally hoping to reason with the old man, they'd always been on relatively good terms considering his silent and stern personality was like her own, but no matter what she said or how she argued, he wouldn't give up any information on Sanji at all. He did however inform her that it was entirely Sanji's choice to do so and let slip that Sanji was dealing with family issues and didn't need more stress in his life at the moment.

That was when she decided to respect the old man and Sanji's wishes. Zeff may be a lot of nasty things, but all the crew knew that he treasured Sanji above all else. Sanji had skimmed over his adopted childhood with them all but had kept the details very minimal for the most part. Robin felt that he had opened up to her a little more than the others barring Zoro, because of their kindred spirit, but that didn't say all too much. Zoro was probably the one who knew Sanji best they had been inseparable after all.

After falling in love with the blond at first sight during the Toudai open campus, seventeen-year-old Zoro was smitten. Sadly, the fiery blond he'd run into was not so easily enamored. From Nami's description of the whole event, Sanji was less than impressed that a wall of muscle not looking the right way had knocked him flat to the ground. The redhead's depiction of a speechless Zoro looking wide-eyed at a furiously cursing Frenchman who was trying to get the tongue-tied oaf off him, sounded every bit the comical start of a romance that it turned out to be. Apparently, after all that, later in the day the two had another private collision wherein seventeen-year-old Sanji was being _prepositioned_ by some senior students and Zoro felt like he had to cut in to help. Sanji's recollection of the events were hysterically easy to picture.

 _"That stupid moss head came up behind them just as I was about to tell them EXACTLY where they should go, and instead of pushing them aside, or calling them out, grabs my HUNDRED AND FIFTY RALPH LAUREN shirt in his SWEATY HANDS and YANKS me out of there saying –you won't BELIEVE this– 'Sorry, this guy's spoken for, find someone else.' LIKE BLOODY HELL, MOSS HEAD! –I'm thinking, so as soon as we're around a block away I let him have it. He deserved it, mother fucker. Treating me like a damsel in distress from the eighteen hundreds or something."_

It was only at the end of April the following year when they met again. After just starting the school year, Luffy had somehow miraculously made friends with all the current members of the 'crew' and that was that. Even then it took the pair a while to get together, in fact, Zoro had kept trying to work up the courage to finally ask the hot blond out. After a half a year of watching Zoro quietly pine for Sanji, both she and Nami took it upon themselves to talk to Zoro about perhaps letting it go or taking the plunge. There was a time and a place for persistence and whilst the dynamics of their mismatched group of personalities was functioning amazingly well within that six months of university, they were concerned that Zoro might just be barking up the wrong tree. To put it simply, they were worried that Sanji just wasn't that interested in Zoro. However, Zoro was never one to give up easily and low and behold, after their summer weekend party down in Okinawa, the two announced that they were a couple and barely left each other's sides since.

They were so well matched and seemingly so attentive to each other for the next two years that it was a huge shock to them all when Sanji had announced his sudden break up with Zoro and that he was returning to France. It just seemed to come out of nowhere, and yet, all of the gang who saw Sanji in that month or so leading up to the break up confessed he looked stressed. Months after the break up, when he finally came to terms with it, Zoro blamed himself, saying he'd been too focused on his Kendo tournaments and showcase match with Mihawk. On nights since then, when he'd been drunk enough to talk about what went down between himself and the blond, he always repeated the same promises to listen better, to make time for Sanji. So, it seemed to the group, that Sanji had left because Zoro wasn't paying enough attention to him. A strange break in character for the usually self-sufficient man, but what did they know? They'd all talked about it privately, sans the ex-couple, and they each had their own ideas on the validity of their conjectures but it didn't change the fact that the pair were past being fixed, especially since their chef hadn't wanted to be found, let alone negotiated back into a relationship.

Still. It was all in the past and it was always easier to put blame on people when looking back. After all, hindsight was always twenty-twenty, right? Robin sighed softly into her drink returning to Nami's prattling about the famous ex-couple.

"But really, Robin. What do _you_ think happened with the kid's mother? You were pretty close with him before. What's you're speculation?" She asked over the rim of her glass.

"What's the speculation on what?" Chimed in a cheery voice as tanned arms wrapped around Nami in a light hug.

"Ace!" Nami cheered, placing down her drink as her other hand came up to clasp onto of the strong forearms wrapped around her as she tilted her head up. "It's been so long! How are you?"

"Fine, babydoll." He smiled. "You and Luffy together yet?" He teased giving her a knowing look. Nami merely rolled her eyes at Ace's usual greeting and picked up her drink again.

"You gotta let it go, Ace." She sighed, shaking her head. "It's getting old."

"Ah come on!" Ace pandered leaning in. "You know its meant to be, you just don't want to admit it!" Nami let out a snort, rolling her eyes.

"Why would I want to settle for _that_ maniac? I'm not _that_ desperate." Nami brushed off.

"Say what you will, girl. But I know you're meant to be my future sister-in-law. You're just being stubborn." Nami let out an exasperated noise as Robin chuckled lightly besides them. It was the same ongoing gag since their uni days but it was all in harmless fun with a slight ringing of truth to it all to make it that little bit sharp.

"Well then," Nami started primly. "Buy your supposed future sister-in-law another drink." She griped, downing the rest of her lime coloured drink and slamming the empty glass on the counter.

"Will do sis!" He smiled, pecking her on the cheek. "Another for the lady!" He called to the bar tender catching his attention. "My tab!" He grinned and caught the nod of acknowledgement the Brazilian sent his way.

"No Roberto, mine if you will." Robin chimed in with glance at Roberto then turned to her friends. "I can't let my guests pay." She went by way of explanation.

"Ah, Robin!" Ace gushed leaning over to kiss her cheek in greeting. "I knew there was a reason I loved you!"

"I hope it isn't the only one." Robin replied dryly, a catlike smile gracing her lips.

"Of course not!" Ace affirmed. "It's one of the many wonderful things about you though!" He added earning chuckles from both the ladies.

"Someone sounds like he's been around Sanji too much, isn't. that. right? Mr. Portgas...?" Nami probed, a fierce gleam in her eye.

"Eh?" Ace blinked completely caught off his guard as he stood awkwardly between the two ladies.

"A matter for a different time," Nami muttered softly before raising her voice to continue. "Now you're here, you can tell us more about Mrs. Sanji or more to the point, why there's a lack of one in Sanji's life. Spill!" She commanded.

"Ah ha ha… Nami-chan…" Ace started nervously taking a step back. "There's not much to say. He hasn't told me much anyway–"

"–Oh come _on_ Ace!" The redhead interjected. "I know he confides in you! When they broke up, only _you_ knew why. It was a damn shock to everyone else."

"It was a shock to me too!" He defended. "I only went 'round to ask questions that's why I found out about it. Thinking back on that time, I think I was a pretty lousy friend. I mean I didn't realize at all how he felt until he told me. I don't want to make him uncomfortable or feel like he doesn't belong." He started. Nami's face was not impressed but it looked like Robin was listening.

"He hasn't told me anything about the mother other than she's _not around_ anymore, if you catch my drift." Nami's eyes narrowed sharply. "He wasn't exactly welcoming more conversation about the topic after that."

"What, you mean she skipped out on her own kid?" Nami spat, keeping no secret about how much the thought offended her. Being orphaned at such a young age, she held resentment to any parent that could 'throw away' their kid. Ace cleared his throat awkwardly.

"No, I mean the _permanent_ kind of _can't_ be here."

"You mean she's _dead_?" She asked bluntly, utterly astounded. For once she looked speechless but the atmosphere was quickly turning into something Ace would rather not deal with. He took his hat off and ran a hand through his hair.

"Look, I'm not sure if I'm supposed to say or not but come on. Give him a break. Don't be nosey about it. If he doesn't want to talk, he shouldn't have to." He tried to reason.

"And yet, he tells _you_ about it." Nami quipped back. Ace let out a strangled noise as she ignored him and continued. "Maybe that's why he's back? Broken hearted? Ok," She said straightening up in her seat. "I retract my previous 'only gay' theory. His wife died and now he's back because Paris is too painful."

"What the fuck, Nami? Is that what this is all about? You betting on his life or something?" Ace questioned. His tone was tight as he tried to hold back his anger on behalf of Sanji. Nami was a good friend although sometimes her sensitivity or lack thereof, needed work. The redhead rolled her eyes as she tossed some of her hair back over one shoulder showing off more of her creamy skin.

"It's not like for money or anything." She sighed in an exasperated tone as if talking to a child. "Even if none of _you lot_ are going to be honest about, we all _know_ we've been thinking and questioning his reasons for being gone so long and leaving the way he did. I'm just not beating around the bush about it. Don't hate on me for saying what we're all thinking." She ended in a self-righteous tone.

Ace stared at her flabbergasted for a moment and his eyes shifted to Robin in disbelief. Unfortunately, it seemed the ever stoic Robin was living up to her reputation. Nothing on her face gave away what she was thinking and for the second time that night, Ace felt compelled to defend his friend from the scrutiny of these two women. Still, he was never one to be harsh with women, a kindred trait he shared with a certain cook.

"You know," He began softly, forcing himself to remain calm and speak rationally, not emotionally. "There's a difference between _speculating_ and _prying_. If you really want a hundred percent _honesty_ , I doubt that he's considered us _friends_ this entire time he was gone if he didn't want to contact any of us… it's something that I'm still getting used to myself. But he agreed to come tonight, probably to rekindle what friendship we did have and hopefully make it better, but don't go making this group a place where he doesn't feel comfortable or feels judged or something… just something to take into consideration, lil sis." He ended looking directly into her eyes.

She met his own with her own fiery gaze but it seemed the message had been passed on. One could never try to control Nami's actions, but if you could be blunt and open about all the facts, sometimes it was enough for the redhead to reconsider things on her own and make the right choice. She was a bit of a pain, but she was _their_ pain. All of the gang had their own little quirks and they each recognized and accommodated for them for them to work seamlessly together as a group. He just hoped that Sanji would come to see that when he came tonight. This were very much the same, but at the same time, completely different. The blond's absence from the group had left a permanent scar and they had all coped as best they could with it, bandaging themselves in the best way they could. He just hoped that tonight they weren't about to rip off bandaged of wounds that hadn't healed. It was inevitable, but perhaps, they all needed this fresh dose of antiseptic to make them really start the healing process once and for all. He just hoped that when all was said and done they would be a team once more, stronger and closer than ever.

* * *

Uploaded 11th of April 2018

First off, I apologise for the extremely late upload. The school year has just started here in Japan and unfortunately some Japanese teachers aren't too time efficient when they decide to revamp old lesson plans...suffice it to say, the past two weeks has been me in meetings trying to understand my teacher's goals and lay them out in a more simple way for the OTHER Japanese teachers to understand them... It. Has. Not. Been. Fun.

Although, I will accept some blame too. My younger sister and a friend are visiting me here in Japan for my birthday (It was a great time at a Sailor Moon Cafe and Alice Cafe in Osaka with lots of sakura flowers everywhere and amazing coffee to boot!) so my free time has been handed over to them with no regard for my usual introverted tenancies such as fanfiction writing.

Second of all, I realise that there is a lot of exposition in this chapter... I wanted to offload some background information to the readers and although I'm not _one hundred_ percent happy with it... I am accepting that with my time schedule, this is the best I could do for now. Constructive criticism is always welcome.

Subaru's dreams: I'm glad you liked the Luffy/Zoro talk. I think it's necessary to actually show how their such good friends. I'm sure there'll be more of them soon.

mrscreepyheather: I loved writing the Zoro/Leo moments too! It was largely based off my time babysitting and playing with kids that are just so open and welcoming to new people and new friends.

Jujus: Thanks for the encouragement. I am sorry you had to wait so long for this chapter. I hope it was worth it!

Raigon: Thanks for your input, I guess I can see it as a bit of a stretch for the first time their hanging out. It's good to note, thanks for your POV. I did use my own experiences, but I guess that yeah, those open 'I like you' or 'You're cool' happen later on in the timeline when they're super used to you being around. Good thing to keep note of for their relationship, thanks!

Guest: I am glad you're thrilled. Again, sorry for the super long wait for the upload...like I said...life. But I hope the next upload won't be as long!


	6. Chapter Six

CHAPTER SIX

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

Zeff sighed to himself, hand clenching into his pantleg as he reached the bottom of the steps. It wasn't getting any easier taking those steep devil-stairs but he'd be damned if he let anyone else know how much they bothered him. Flinging the damp bath towel around his neck he moved into the living room only to catch sight of his eggplant staring off with the mirror. He thought the kid had long left for his get together but of course, the idiot was overthinking things and had worked himself up into a tizzy about why he shouldn't go. His furrowed brows told Zeff all he needed to know. Same old silly child.

He had always had a hard time making friends with his bratty personality. He often needed a push to put himself out there and just get on with things. Having a stare off with his reflection would accomplish nothing. Despite being a little emotional, Sanji was strong but at times he let himself wallow in self-doubt. It was one of the things Zeff hated seeing on his usually proud son. He often needed help to shake him out of it. Taking a breath, he decided to be the catalyst.

"Eggplant, why're you still here?" He called enjoying the tremor of a jump the blond tried to withhold. "Don't you have a party to get to?" He barked out, rough and callously, the perfect mix to make Sanji defensive and call his spitfire attitude to the forefront.

"It's not a party, old man." The blond sighed with little emotion and the crease in his own brow deepened. He didn't like that given-up-attitude sound at all. It was so unlike Sanji he growled a little as he spoke out.

"Party, shindig, hang out, whatever the hell you wanna call it. Why aren't you at it yet, eggplant?"

"I'm getting ready." Sanji griped as he grabbed his comb from the mantle once more brushing through silken strands. Zeff's eye twitched.

"If you comb through your hair one more time it'll start to fall out!" He groused. "Quit pansying around and get out there already! I want the place to myself!" He huffed as he sat himself down in his favourite armchair cursing himself inwardly for not grabbing the remote which was on the other end of the coffee table –out of reach.

"I'm _not_ pansyi–" Sanji started turning to face him with sharp eyes. A smirk unfolded on old lips. That was better. That fiery attitude that would see his son through all hardships. Forgetting about the remote, he decided to play it cool. Sanji usually didn't see minor gaps in logic when he was flustered or angry.

"You're stalling, eggplant, and we both know it." He stated briskly as he leant back into the comfy chair watching Sanji surreptitiously as he waited for a reply.

The blunt statement shut the younger chef up. He had no defense for the truth. Sanji really couldn't explain it, but he really didn't want to go to the catch up tonight. It wasn't that he didn't like the gang – that wasn't true in the slightest. He really enjoyed the quirky characters in their crew. Their slightly abnormal personalities were probably what helped him connect with them in the first place. Their eccentricities were not the norm in Japan and with his French blood and appearance, he would never be as well.

Contrary to the impression he gave Ace, he actually missed the lot of them when overseas. There were many times especially in that first year where he had contemplated calling one of them just to chat and offload his concerns and stress or to just simply talk to. However, like he had said to Ace, he stopped himself for Zoro's sake. Who wanted to know that their ex was still in contact with their friends? No, if he and Zoro were to have a clean break, he wouldn't reach out to the people that Zoro had known first. Even if they were the only people near his age that he was close to, he wouldn't put them and Zoro in that messy situation. He didn't want anyone to feel like they had to choose sides. Though, after speaking with the pyrotechnician, he began to doubt himself.

Had he really done the right thing?

Could he really call himself their friend if he just disappeared without a trace, barely and explanation and no contact details to go off? At the time, he thought he was saving them all the trouble of having to 'pick teams' after the break up. He had justified it, thinking that they would obviously all pick Zoro any day since they'd known him far longer. In his mind, he was just the add on that didn't actually end up working out. He tried to make it out like he was doing some noble thing –allowing Zoro to save some face after the whole ordeal– but if he were honest with himself, the real reason was because it was easier to leave others behind than be left behind.

He'd already been discarded so many times; if he'd given the others the option to choose and they chose Zoro, his self-esteem would have plummeted into nothingness. If he left before they could decide, he could always pretend that maybe –just maybe– they'd have chosen him.

The scary thing was that this meeting would put all the hypotheticals in their place. Meeting again face to face everything could blow up in his face. He'd barely even been able to deal with seeing Zoro. Ace had been a surprise when he first ran into him, but they'd quickly readjusted into their old friendship for the most part. There were still things that Sanji didn't want to share. Stories that were still too raw to talk about. But it both scared and thrilled him that his relationship with Ace could be so easily rekindled. When Luffy had rocked up at the Baratie, that same anxiety flared up in him once more. However, Luffy had this way of bringing out the best in people and within minutes, they were chatting away like old times.

Then Zoro had showed.

And once more, Sanji was forced to remember exactly why he'd stopped all contact with them in the first place. It wasn't that he wasn't over the break up…it was more so the fact that he realised that they all could be checking in on him for Zoro's sake _. '_ How was the ex, going? Successful? Failure? What was the latest goss'

He hated himself for thinking like that, but he couldn't help it. He'd never had really good friends until he met those crazy fellas in university. He could count the number of true friends he had in Europe on his hands.

In any case, his old insecurities of being left behind resurfaced almost immediately after seeing Zoro again and he couldn't help but feel it was all a massive mistake in being friendly with them all again. Seeing Zoro again that night had really revealed to him that despite time healing and all that crap, old wounds still hurt. He'd tried to take away the positives from it. Maybe it was a good thing? A reminder that right now he had other things to focus on rather than a possible romantic relationship. That thought brought the whole mess he'd left behind with Law came crashing to the forefront of his mind and for the thousandth time Sanji was forced to that same thought.

 _What the hell is wrong with me in relationships?_

It seemed the only people he could truly have good relationships with were family. Zeff, although not related by blood, had put up with a plethora of unpleasantness throughout the years, and it was partly the same reason why he was here in Japan now, he owed the man so much. But maybe that was it. _She_ had told him he was too self-sacrificing… maybe that's why his relationships never worked out. He'd constantly put himself second until he couldn't take it anymore and turn around and blame the other. It was scary how quickly she'd figured that out about him. He hadn't noticed it until _she_ had pointed it out… he'd been offended at first… then he'd tried to justify it… but at the end of the day, she was right… still, just being aware of a personality flaw wasn't an easy fix way of changing it. She had told him it wasn't a flaw, it was just something he had to be aware of lest people take advantage of it, but ever since it had been pointed out to him, he couldn't help but see himself as broken. His current musings were broken by the old man again.

"What are you thinking so hard about, eggplant?" Zeff's soft voice murmured.

Sanji turned fully to see him still seated on the armchair gruff-faced. The old man liked to think himself unreadable, but Sanji had known him for a long time now and saw those furrows of concern etched into his hard-worn face. He couldn't let Zeff worry about him even now. What kind of an adult was he? He was twenty fucking five already, he needed to get his shit together. So, he slipped on an overconfident smirk and took three steps over to coffee table and grabbed the TV remote that Zeff had obviously forgotten to nab himself before sitting down.

"I'm thinking that I gotta watch out for this old forgetful man, before Alzheimer's sets in." He teased as he plopped the remote in his father's lap before strutting to the door Zeff's loud curses following behind him. "Don't wait up!" He called cheerfully as he exited to the sound of a pissed off Zeff shouting after him.

"AS IF I'D BLOODY DO THAT, YOU STUPID EGGPLANT!"

* * *

He was so fucking nervous.

It was a good thing that Luffy had decided to come pick him up tonight and an even better idea that he brought Brook along for the ride too. The car would have been too silent otherwise. He could always count on these two to create a good atmosphere and stop him from sinking further and further into his maze-like brain of what if scenarios.

After hanging out at Sanji's the last time, he'd solidified the fact that he wanted Sanji back in his life, child or no. Leo was, in fact, fucking adorable and honestly the epitome of a mini Sanji despite the fact his hair was more of the strawberry blond than the glistening gold that Sanji's own was. It had been a shock to the system finding out Sanji had had a son, but even stranger was the fact that he'd so quickly accepted that fact and still wanted Sanji in his life. He hadn't been this happy since their break up that fucking nightmare of an October all those years ago. He still didn't like to dwell on it. He'd been so fucking busy with his tournaments and bitterly upset that Sanji had extended his trip to France which took even more time away from their 'together' time. It was a while after Sanji had left and it became clear they'd broken up that Zoro actually manned up and faced his own childishness. He meditated on his words and actions and quickly realised how selfish he had been.

A major part of the reason he didn't hop on the next flight to go and see Sanji was pure shame. How could he face the blond after all he'd done? He'd been so focused on himself, he had had tournaments all of September that he was participating in nationwide; ones that he'd been training for for months. He came to see he always tried to make Sanji fit into his schedule and rarely went out of his way to bend his own timetable to fit the lonely blond. He'd passed off Sanji's arguments to talk more as petty revenge for Zoro's own petulant complaints about the chef's upcoming trip. It seemed that every time he came back from a win, Sanji was more and more clingy. And to his shame, even now, Zoro had been 'too tired' to deal with it. He could still remember Sanji's face while skyping with him from Hokkaido. The blond was near hysterically panicked about something and kept repeatedly asking him when he would be coming home. He remembered trying to placate him with the usual guff of 'not long, now' and 'soon, cook, soon' while all the while thinking only of the networking opportunities he had with the Kendo community in Hokkaido. He remembered Sanji's relieved face when he finally promised to _try_ and get a flight back the next day…a shameful twinge always struck his heart when he though of that blatant lie.

Zoro _never_ lied.

It was a point he was quite proud of. Some people thought it made him offensive or too easy to read, but one thing Zoro had found during his meditations was that when one lied to others it became easy to lie to oneself. And when one did that, it showed in the way of the sword. Wanting to be the best swordsman, he couldn't afford to let himself be taken down by something like that.

The memory of that moment will forever be ingrained in his heart. Sanji was relieved, alright. In fact, they'd finally ended the skype call and Zoro could rest up for the next day. At the time, he hadn't thought much of it. But now, the guilt that welled up thinking of Sanji stressing when he texted late the next day that he couldn't get a flight –another lie– made his gut churn even now.

He knew what he had to do. He had to apologise. He had to try and make amends and he had to make it clear again that he loved Sanji and wanted him in his life. Still, it didn't take the fucking nerves away so he was glad he had friends that were such stupid distractions.

Luffy and Brook were blasting out their rendition of 'Good time', Brook quite well, and Luffy… well more like shouting. It was enough to bring him out of his deep thoughts. He had such crazy friends, but they were always there for him when he needed them.

"Come on, Zoro! Lighten up! It's party time!" Luffy yelled and Zoro let loose a genuine smile. He could always count on Luffy to have his back.

* * *

He decided to light up and hover around outside a bit before going in. He'd been alright on the way over, but now that he was here outside Robin's bar, he wasn't so sure if he had the strength to go in.

 _Hana_ had a good vibe. It seemed to be created with a more mature style of patron in mind -the type that liked to sit and _enjoy_ drinks over conversation than get sloshed within the first hour. Sanji appreciated it. The clubbing scene had never been his thing. It had taken a few times, but Sanji had learnt his lesson. You never met decent people in clubs; just heartbreakers looking for one-night stands. Add in the fact that he was the Japanese epitome of 'the-foreigner-you-should-try-once-to-see-what-it's-like-but-never-date-seriously' and his sense of self value plummeted through the floor. He'd quickly found that the bar scene was more his thing where people weren't as ridiculously off their face or _too_ overt in their attempts at getting in _anyone's_ pants. He half chuckled to himself as he wondered if Robin had chosen _Hana_ to meet at for this exact reason. He wouldn't put it past her, the woman seemed to know all about his relationship fails in those early years of university. It seemed like gossip had gone around campus like the common cold. When their little group had formed, Nami and Robin had joked about how many girls had come asking them if the sexy rumors about the mysterious French boy were true. The group had laughed each taking their turn to get a dig in on the popular blond but the ever-observant brunette had pulled him aside later on and apologized for making light of the situation. He hadn't been able to say anything to that but he hoped that the reassuring squeeze she gave his shoulder was her way of accepting his silent thanks and gratitude.

Ever since then, he had felt a sense of camaraderie with the pensive woman. She left him his space but showed her support when he needed it. In fact, she was probably one of his most avid supporters in his relationship with Zoro in her own silent way. Along with Brook and Ace, Robin was one of the members of their little group that Sanji felt he could open up to a little more than the rest. It was more the fact that out of all the gang these three had the highest level of maturity when it counted.

He exhaled into the night air watching as the smoke slowly dissipated leaving no trace but the slight smell of tobacco.

"Yo, ho, ho!" A cheery voice called out from the other end of the parking lot and Sanji's eyes swiveled to pinpoint the familiar cry. "What's this? Sanji without a smoking partner? I must oblige!" The tall American ended coming closer into view with Luffy and Zoro in tow.

"Brook." Sanji said by way of greeting as they all came closer. He smiled warmly as he stuck out a hand and they shook. "Zoro, Luffy." He nodded at the two.

"Sanjiiiiiiiii!" Luffy shouted bouncing on the spot before glomping him in a quick but heavy hug. "So glad you came!" Sanji just gave a small smile.

"Said I would, didn't I?" He replied releasing smoke and taking a drag once more as the little monkey slid off him.

"Ah, Sanji, you don't happen to have one of your precious _Gauloise,_ do you? Can I sponge one off you?"

"Bloody moocher," Sanji muttered and let out a huff belied by his soft smile as he fished out his cigs and lighter, striking up for his old-time friend. Brook inhaled deeply the leisurely let out his breath.

"Ah, golden." He sighed as the four of them stood under the lamppost outside the bar. A few minutes passed as they waited for the two to finish their joints. Aimless chatter about their week had Sanji relaxing and feeling like all would be well. By the time they'd stamped the finished butts into the ground, he felt a lot better and walked into the establishment alongside Brook. Luffy spotted the group and bounded over yelling leaving the three of them to follow with a much more relaxed pace and their dignity still intact.

It seemed that they were the last to arrive and the boys quickly seated themselves around the unoccupied end of the table while Sanji greeted the members of the group face to face with hugs and kisses and his usual suave style. Chopper and Usopp glomped him and refused to let him go for a solid minute as they balled about missing him in their usual style. He briefly thanked Robin for hosting the evening when Franky came 'round asking for their drink orders and zipped off to the bar to have Roberto fill the order. Zoro slipped in next to Ace hoping that the man's sensitivity to the 'Sanji' issue would see him through the night. Nami was already lecturing Sanji on not keeping contact while crushing him to her chest. As the group chattered away, a waitress came by with their drinks and Usopp divvied them out to their owners. Sanji looked down the group while they all settled in before turning to the only empty chair at the head of the table. He grimaced and garnered a loud chuckle from Ace.

"Oh, come on, Sanji! It's the seat of honour!" He teased. The blond made sure to mess up his hair before he sat down earning shouts of indignation from the sour pyrotechnician. Robin stood commanding the attention of the group as she raised her glass, the universal symbol of toast about to be made. A hush fell across the group as they stopped to listen.

"Tonight, we are all here to celebrate the long-awaited return of our dear friend, Sanji." She started loud and proud, she turned to face him more fully as she went on. "We hope you've had many good adventures during your time in France and we anxiously wait to hear your passionate regales of all the fun you've had." She said jovially and Franky's whoop of excitement had Chopper, Usopp and Luffy joining in as the rest of the table sniggered softly. When she spoke again, her voice was softer though the seriousness in her eyes had Sanji enraptured as he tried to keep his face from baring his emotions. "We are glad to have you back with us now and hope that you will be for a long time to come. To create and share many more memories. To build our lives together. To support each other and above all wallow in this great thing we call 'friendship'." She paused a moment the attention of the whole table wrapped around her pinky finger as they ate up her every word. "To Sanji!" She concluded raising her glass higher as all the occupants of the table moved to do the same.

"To Sanji!" They all cheered and toasted with each other, each one coming over to clink glasses with the man of the hour and spout their own little phrase of happiness at his return.

Sanji blushed lightly and smiled throughout the whole ordeal. Despite being known as rather popular –wanted even– he was still so unaccustomed to being the center of attention –rather it made him rather uncomfortable. Still, in this moment, he took it in stride.

Ace laughed loudly as Luffy almost spilled a jug of his favourite beer all over himself. Chopper wide-eyed as ever was engaging in a rather excitable discussion with Robin about his latest paper on some ancient medicinal remedy. The whole gang was cheerful and energetic and it all felt so much like _home._

Sanji smiled softly to himself as he lifted his merlot to his lips once more. Perhaps things would work out for the best.

* * *

It was later on in the evening, his first glass was long past gone and the girls had brought out their homecoming gift for him, a rather lovely vintage bottle of red, his favourite French brand. He'd insisted they share it and the girls had acquiesced to a glass each and no more, it was _his_ present after all. Besides, they'd ordered enough drinks for their group to cover four times as many tables throughout the evening. That's always what happened when you had Nami and Zoro drinking by your side. No alcohol was enough for the pair of sods.

Chopper was starting to get a little tipsy. Being the good little intern that he was, he had only had 2 drinks spaced out over the evening, but the twenty-year old's low tolerance to alcohol was evident in his slightly more erratic movements and impaired decision making. Sanji decided he really should go over and stop Ace and Usopp from corrupting the poor thing further when Nami's slightly lilted speech caught his attention.

"So Sanji, I heard there's no Mrs. Blackleg?"

It seemed all chatter up their end of the table dissipated immediately as many of the gang sat stunned with Nami's candidness on such a delicate topic. Sure, she was known to be rather brash, but this was too much even for her. Sanji subtly eyed the glasses on the table that hadn't been collected yet. Quite a few were in Nami's range and he was reminded of the redhead's unpleasant personality when drunk. The best thing was to avoid answering her questions in detail. When drunk, she was like an incessant leech, stuck on you sucking out information with little to no qualms about personal boundaries or politeness.

"No, Nami." Sanji said blankly then raised his glass to his lips as he turned once more to face Brook hoping she'd sink her claws into someone else.

"Is it because, you missed Japan so much? Or a certain green-haired swordsman." She teased. Half the table who were in earshot turned their attention on Nami. Franky was –luckily– engaging the other end of the table in a hilarious recount of a time he'd found himself sans-pants. Ace currently had a totally scandalized look on his face as he stared openly at the redhead. Brook's eyes were widened in disbelief and Zoro was attempting to fuse himself into the booth. Sanji mentally sighed at the tableau. Fuck Nami and her inability to keep her thoughts to herself. In the past, when he had less responsibilities, he had the energy to forgive her drunken thoughtlessness, made excuses for it in fact. But as it stood now, all he felt was irritation at being the center of attention in the not so great limelight. Judging by Zoro's attempt at biological fusion, it was the last thing the swordsman wanted to discuss as well. He was trying to tactfully turn the situation around when the tense moment was broken by the final member who had been within hearing.

"Nami, I don't believe that that is any of your business." Robin admonished with a hard look. Brook and Ace tried not to look at the two parties mentioned. But Sanji merely took it as his queue to take another sip of wine leaving it to Robin to handle the situation. His exterior was cool as ever but he refused to look in the marimo's direction. He lit up a smoke, intending to return to conversation with Brook before the redhead decided to latch onto him again.

Zoro on the other hand was glancing at the cook and at Robin and finally landed on Nami as she spoke.

"Oh, come _on_ , Robin." She drawled rolling her eyes. "Don't get all high and mighty on me." She turned to Sanji again who was cursing himself inwardly for lighting up instead of getting into conversation with the musician.

"But, seriously. No wife? What happened?"

A moment passed where Sanji purposefully held Nami's gaze before exhaling smoke that drifted though the bar. He found himself slipping into his old habit of giving her the benefit of the doubt. No doubt they all had questions for him and he'd done little to answer any of them, so perhaps he could give some answer instead of silence. Still, this topic was too raw to talk openly about.

"Life happened, Nami." He said giving nothing away, his tone suggesting the topic was not really up for discussion. The redhead was about to retort before Robin stepped in once more.

"We all have things we don't want to share with others, Nami. Be smart and take the hint for once." It was probably the bluntest thing the brunette had ever said. Usually, she spoke in round about ways where her words could be interpreted by the listener however they chose. With that the brunette stood and garnered the attention of the whole table. "Looks like we need another round, what will everyone be having?"

"Ah, Robin. I'll get that for you!" Franky sang.

"No, no. I need to talk with Roberto anyway. So, what'll it be?" The Four musketeers shouted out their refills, Zoro murmured for Sake and Ace for another whiskey.

"Thank you, my dear, but I have the bottle." Sanji smiled gratuitously as he topped up his own glass with the red left in the ice bucket.

"Nami?" Robin questioned. "We have a new cocktail menu at the bar, if you're interested." A brief pause passed before the redhead stood uttering some nonsense in agreement. She could tell Robin wanted to talk.

When the pair had returned, accompanied by a waiter loaded with all their drinks, the atmosphere seemed to be calmer than before but it didn't stop the people up Sanji's end of the table feeling like something was going to go down. And how right they were.

It was nearing one in the morning when they'd decided they'd be having their last round so they could go home and actual rest before the poor sods who had to work tomorrow had to wake. It had started innocently enough. A cherry faced Chopper came to hover between Brook and Sanji even tipsier than earlier.

"Sanji!" The kid all but shouted and Sanji couldn't help the wide smile that unfolded on his own face. He –like everyone else in their little group– had a rather large soft spot for the genius child. Though looking at him now, Sanji was forced to accept the fact that people don't stay kids forever. That little teenager he had last seen was now _legally_ an adult and was already working hard as medical intern. His heart brimmed with pride.

"I heard you have a son! That's sooooooo coooooool!" He practically shouted, his eyes shining with excitement.

Sanji huffed out a laugh. It was good to see not _everything_ changed.

"Yeah," he smiled softly. "His name's Leo. He's almost four years old."

"Four?!" Chopper enthused garnered snickers from the other adults at this end of the table. "Soooooo cooool! When's his birthday?"

"May second." Sanji smiled.

"Oh my gosh! That's soooooooo soon!" Chopper gasped. "We should buy him a present! No! Lots of presents! For all the years we missed!"

A rowdy crow of cheers agreed with the little doctor and Sanji swung surprised eyes around the table as Brook, Franky, Ace and Zoro started comparing present ideas and laying dibs on who would buy what. Their drunken slurs amused him especially when the others had started to convince Franky that a speedo that said SUUUUUUPER was _not_ an appropriate gift for a four-year-old. The present planning was interrupted when Nami interjected.

"Hold on. Sanji you said he's turning four?" She said, her eyes searching his. Sanji was confused by the intensity but answered her question.

"Yes, that's correct."

"And he's born on May second?" Her face was hard as stone and by now the group was intrigued by her seriousness on getting these facts.

"Yes, Nami." Brook interjected placatingly. "Sanji's just said, turning four, and birthday is second of May. Come now, darling. You've gotta pay more attention than that, even if you've had a few!" Brook tried to joke to break the weird atmosphere that was overtaking this end of the table.

"Even if I've had a few I can still do math!" Nami glared back at the musician. She never liked to be made fun of for being drunk or tipsy or anything of the like so perhaps it was to prove herself that she uttered her next sentence that sent the table into silence. Her blazing eyes turned to Sanji.

"If Leo's born on May second, and he's turning four, who the fuck did you knock up in August when you and Zoro were still dating?"

* * *

Uploaded 15th of May 2018

Duh, duh, duh!

Sorry for being absent so long... April was...hectic...Sorry that you all had to wait a month again for this chapter. However, I am much happier with how this one turned out. I tried my best at shifting the point of views in this chapter and I actually think I did pretty ok. Let me know if you disagree (suggestions on how to do it better would be good!)

Believe it or not, but this bomb has been in the plans since day one! All of the history behind Leo's mother etc was already penned down before I even began writing the actual story :) I do hope I've given enough detail up till now that it won't bite me in the butt later!

Thanks to all who are still around and reading this, your reviews are big motivators for me to keep writing! So thanks to each and every one of you!

Subaru's dreams: Thanks for being so understanding! I'm glad you're still here! Yeah, I actually have a LOT of plot written for the year of the break up so I can look at those notes and write about the character's feelings authentically. I do hope to drop more nuggets of their uni days throughout this piece but in a way that doesn't do a whole 'flashback' sequence...I'm REALLY trying to avoid that, because I feel like I rely on it too much so please bear with me!

Raigon: I'm really glad there's someone here that loves Ace as much as you do! Seriously, I love playing with AcexSanji because c'mon, if not Zoro, then Sanji has OPTIONS! (◍˃̶ᗜ˂̶◍)ﾉ" Thanks for your encouragement! I really want to see this through too!

toro: Thanks for reviewing! Good to have you here! Thanks for your kind words!

Curlybrow: Thank you for your reviews! I'm glad you find it easy to read (I know I tend to make long linking clauses in my writing but I think that's just me so I'm glad you like it!) I'm so happy you like Sanji and Leo! I hope you stick around for more! Yeah, Ace is such a sweetheart! I hope you enjoy the love... _square_ as it unfolds ヽ(。ゝω・)ノ


	7. Chapter Seven

CHAPTER SEVEN

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

The atmosphere was awkward as hell. He was horrified to realize that he couldn't move a muscle. His heart was throbbing so loudly to his own ears that he was sure the rest of the occupants of the table would soon look at him in sick fascination and…pity.

Still, moments passed and no one moved from this cliché tableau.

Up until this point in the night, Zoro had felt himself relax like he hadn't in years. Sure, there'd be that brief moment of butterflies as he glanced at Sanji in his ethereal glory, but for the most part he'd let the tight reign he held on his emotions slacken a little because of the cook's presence. Perhaps it was the nerves, or maybe some sort of macho complex that made him put away twice as many drinks as usual that night in a bid to make himself look more mature than his younger counterpart; whatever the case, he'd been on the sober-side of tipsy for once in a long while but Nami's blunt words had secretly wakened him into full sobriety. They were ringing in his ears, their meaning quickly understood as his brain processed just what the redhead was implying.

He couldn't help it. His eyes flicked to the blond before he even knew what he was doing, fast enough to catch the shock and panic that skittered across that handsome face be concealed by cool indifference. It was the classic Sanji gambit. _Don't ever let it show if you're in hot water._

It was that cover-up that really sprouted the seed of doubt Nami had planted. He never would have ever accused Sanji of cheating. Not in all the time he had together with the blond. The cook was the most loyal lover a person could ask for –his whole persona was built on the fact that he loved so selflessly. It was a hard pill to swallow –suggesting that Sanji, of all people, could be capable of cheating. His instincts were to deny it. It was Nami's mistake about the dates, messing up when they broke up or when Leo's actual date of conception was due to being tipsy…and yet, the fact that no one had piped up correcting Nami of her errors told Zoro all that he needed to know. Nami's math was correct and thus her accusation had solid ground to stand on. Though it was the fact that Sanji hadn't vehemently denied these claims that really drove the knife home.

It wasn't incidental that Sanji kept his eyes locked on Nami's own fiery pair and his gaze followed to once again stare at the redhead. He _knew_ Sanji. _Had_ known him as an intimate lover for _years_. Sanji never shied away from his problems but he _did_ avoid them if there was something else he could fight.

And right now, Sanji could fight Nami in their silent battle of staring.

Zoro felt a lump form in his throat. It was twisted and hard – the kind that formed after you cried your eyes out in pain. It couldn't possibly be true. His mind rebelled at the thought. Sanji had been his everything, he wasn't the kind of man to do this to another. The past four years, Zoro had been beating himself up over the fact that _he_ had driven Sanji away. That it was _his_ fault that things had ended so terribly between them both. But with this…this... _bomb_ that had been dropped on them, everything was falling to pieces. His panicked mind flew to what the other members of the table were thinking of him. Surely, Chopper and Usopp were looking at him with sympathetic pity –they meant well– he knew, but it didn't change the fact that he hated being pitied. The elder members of the table would probably be having similar thoughts but the younger two wouldn't be able to conceal it. He couldn't even try to look in their direction. He swallowed thickly, trying to remain as stoic as possible.

Ace was probably torn. He knew that the pyro and the blond used to be close and a few times in the past, he had questioned how close the brunette was to his lover, but all the same, Ace had been a great friend through the break up. He'd never once badmouthed Sanji nor told him off for the way the blond left, but his presence had been calming all the same. He had been a true rock for Zoro. Even with all that, the way that he sat now, stiffened at Zoro's side, told the swordsman wonders of what the brunette was feeling. Obviously, the man was caught between a rock and hard place. Sanji was a dear friend, but so was Zoro. Even so, Zoro wouldn't blame anyone for taking the blond's side. He'd been downright cold to Sanji in the months leading up to their breakup…it was just…for the first time, he realised that maybe he'd pushed Sanji further than he had initially thought. Immediately after that, his mind lashed out at him, cursing him out for taking the blame. Sure, he hadn't been there for Sanji, but was that any reason to accept cheating as an outcome? Why hadn't Sanji broken up with him before that? How did it get that far?

It was insane how fast the thoughts flew through his mind. Memories of their last months together were coming to the forefront of his mind, challenging him, asking him if these were the signs of the cheating Nami was calling Sanji out on. The extra clingy-ness, their less active sex life, the panicky calls anytime Zoro was out of town. He'd always assumed that these were his own fault, that he'd somehow not been there for Sanji, then his mind reminded him that these problems started long before August, so _was_ he to blame for Sanji cheating? More so, could it really even be called _his_ fault if the blond was the perpetrator? Sanji had his own volition. If it had been Zoro who had cheated on the cook, there was no way the blond would accept the blame of 'not being there enough'.

Everything flew by in his mind and yet only a moment passed among the group before Luffy stood, shuffling the old ratty sunhat on his head.

"I think," the smaller brunette started, "we've all had a lot tonight. Didn't we say we'd be going home now?" He said earning some awkward murmurs from some members of their gang. "Brook," he addressed, facing the older man, "you still okay to take Chopper home as well?"

As the American readily confirmed in a cheery voice, the others started bustling to grab together their things, Brook's naturally jovial adlib distracting and engaging them in conversation. Still, Nami and Sanji sat in their place, neither giving into the other and looking away.

Luffy's hand dropping onto the redhead's shoulder was what finally broke the stare-off as Nami darted her gaze to glare at Luffy and continue her argument. Simultaneously, Robin took it upon herself to start the farewells to Sanji followed closely by Chopper and the rest. The redhead took a breath to call the blond out once more, however, a small shake of Luffy's head had her biting her tongue. She followed his gazes to see Zoro who was trying to look busy putting on his jacket and checking for his wallet, keys and phone. To the others of the group, he looked completely unfazed, but she and Luffy had known him longer than any of them and they could see the way his throat was clenched tight and the amount of times his Adam apple bobbed up and down in an attempt to stifle the sadness that was tearing up his being.

Suddenly she realised exactly who her words had hurt the most that night. Her eyes furtively glanced at Sanji and although he was amiable in his farewells to the others, she couldn't help but spitefully hope that he was hurting even more than Zoro. The hand on her shoulder gave a gentle squeeze and she shut her eyes and leaned into the touch. The guilt was crawling up her throat. Why did this always seem to happen? Another brief squeeze and she took a breath and stood from the table, being the last to do so. Sanji was already walking out alongside Brook, Chopper, Franky and Robin having said farewell to all the other members of the group. Zoro was trailing behind the lot with Usopp and Ace at his side. Brook was taking him home with Chopper, but she could see that it was the last thing Zoro was looking forward to doing tonight. Luffy's lightweight jacket settled on her shoulders and she turned to face him.

"Drive me home, Nami?" He asked with a small smile. She tried her best to return it, but found she couldn't, so with a short tug at her lips she nodded and walked alongside him to the carpark. Brook's car was leaving the carpark with his signature two honk horn and a wave out the window. Robin and Franky were following behind. Luffy gave a small wave as Usopp slid into his car seat. Sanji and Ace were standing halfway down the carpark having a conversation and Nami felt her ire rise once again. Luffy's hand enclosed her own as he led her to her orange mazda. Unlocking it, she heard Luffy call out to Sanji and Ace about a game night later on in the week as she slid into the driver's seat and turned on the ignition pointedly _not_ looking in the blond's direction.

They were halfway to Luffy's before either of them spoke.

"Don't beat yourself up about it."

Having to focus on the road, all Nami could afford was to slide her eyes to the brunette for a second before her sights were back on the asphalt. Her mouth twitched, aching to respond that she _wasn't_ but could only let out a huff of air through her nose.

"Zoro will be fine." Luffy said in an almost placating tone. It wasn't often that he spoke so seriously and it always had her a little on edge when he did. Luffy had this uncanny ability to hit the nail right on the head. The reason it made her uncomfortable was because whenever it happened, she couldn't help but wonder about all the times, she'd said rotten shit or acted poorly and he'd seen it, noted it, knew it for what it was, but let it slide. It made her feel like this idiot knew her way better than she knew him; like he had a read on her that she couldn't quite conceal from him. It was kind of terrifying…that scope of scrutiny the lithe man next to her was capable of. Her thoughts were interrupted by his next statement.

"He _will_ be fine." He paused a second, then added. "Sanji, too."

She stiffened in her seat, unable to hide her fury at the blond…at herself.

"His kid's really cute." Luffy started yammering, back to his more jovial tone. "Super cute and really friendly. Really loves his dad."

The sentence ended pleasantly, but the message hung over her and she wasn't sure if Luffy intended it or not. Of course, the kid had to be great. Of course, Sanji had to be the perfect dad. It's not like she wished the kid any ill will. She didn't even _know_ him. It's not like she was wishing for him not to exist…was it?

She focused on merging lanes, her brow furrowed deeply. It wasn't that she saw the kid as a problem…it's just that Sanji obviously had been lying about something or another and that was all kinds of fucked up. Math didn't lie. Unless the kid was born crazily premature, there was no way that Sanji hadn't fathered him while still in a relationship with Zoro, it was fucking late October when Sanji left for good without a trace. Seeing the way Zoro had blamed himself these past years, she felt like she had solved the problem realizing that Sanji wasn't as innocent in all this as it had seemed. She had just wanted answers, but as fucking usual, got carried away and made things uncomfortable for all the people around her. Just like at work…just like with her step-mother. Would she ever stop being such a damn screw up?

A warm hand laying gently on her shoulder had her flinching but immediately relaxing when she realised who it was. A quick glance at Luffy as she slowed for a red light, showed his concerned face on once more. As she pulled up to the light, he spoke.

"You know, sometimes, it's better to say things than not. Other times, it's better to keep quiet. But you can never _really_ know when those times are…you usually find out when you look back on 'em." She couldn't help but look into his eyes as he went on. "Maybe they needed you to say it. Maybe it's something Zoro's been secretly wondering about. Maybe it's something Sanji never knew how to share. In any case, what's done is done. So, don't worry about it. If you feel bad, apologise to them, but stop blaming yourself for it."

A bitter huff escaped her as she kept her eyes trained on the lights waiting for the green.

"That's easy for you to say. It's not the first time I've fucked things up for other people. Zoro-" She cut off, unable to describe the amount of pain she'd caused him again tonight.

"Zoro's a big boy. He deals with his own problems." Luffy said finitely as the light went green. Nami accelerated, keeping silent for the while. Just because Zoro was solitary, didn't mean she had to agree or like it. A few moments passed before Luffy went on.

"He wasn't completely innocent in all this, Nami."

In shock she spun her head to glare at him, before having to flick her eyes back to the road. She opened her mouth to retort, but Luffy went on, intent on making her listen to him.

"He wasn't at all there for Sanji in those last months. He said as much himself and Ace heard the same thing from Sanji, same as me. I'm not trying to say Sanji is innocent either." He paused, seeming to want that statement to really sink in and Nami felt her anger on Zoro's behalf flare up only to be doused by those words.

"What I'm saying is that none of us know what happened. And more so, it's not our right to know. It's between the two of them. It's not _bad_ that you pointed it out, but maybe it wasn't the best place…even so, all we can do is hope that they sort this out on their own."

And with that, all of the fire in Nami fizzled out and she sifted a hand through her hair, fluffing it out a little as she let out a sigh.

"I hope you're right, Luffy." She murmured. "I just hope you're right."

* * *

Tendrils of smoke rose and dissipated into the air as the two men stood in silence a short distance away from the pub. Ace had taken it upon himself to do the cheerful goodbye waves on behalf of the both of them since it seemed Sanji was already starting to retreat inside his inexpressive shell. He'd barely raised a hand in acknowledgement when Robin and Usopp had driven out of the lot honking their farewells. _C_ _onveniently,_ he'd missed the first car leaving that contained one certain green haired swordsman as a passenger. When Luffy had shouted out across the car park about coming to game night, all Ace could see was how tense the cook was trying _not_ to -in any way, shape or form- acknowledge the redhead that was walking alongside the small brunette. Sanji was withdrawing and he was doing a damn good job of acting unaffected. Ace was no fool, Sanji needed to be told to forget about Nami, but he also was terrified of pushing Sanji too much. If anything, these past months had made it obvious to him that he didn't know the blond nearly as well as he thought he did. It was scary, but he felt like he was coming to terms with it. Though, yet again, after watching Luffy just be himself, acting as he usually did, he realised that if Sanji didn't _like_ the kind of friendship he had to offer, then maybe they weren't _meant_ to be close friends after all. Or anything else for that matter.

With that thought, he bolstered himself and let out another drag before he spoke, consequences be damned.

"You should come." He began, nonchalantly. "We usually order pizza and bring shitty beer, I'm sure everyone would like to have some of your famous nachos and guac. It's been too long."

A moment passed in silence, only smoke filled the air between them. Slightly discouraged by the complete lack of a response he reaffirmed his resolve and went on, trying out his best super-chipper voice.

"Tell ya what, I'll pay for the groceries. Even get that stupidly expensive Czech beer that's the _only_ kind you drink." He teased and leant in to elbow Sanji lightly in his side. The jostle shifted Sanji further into the light and Ace finally caught the tense look on the cook's face. Immediately, his grin slipped off his face and he stepped into the blond's personal space, one hand coming to rest between the cook's shoulder and neck. It was maybe too personal, too close, but he couldn't help it. He hated seeing Sanji uncomfortable and he was naturally a very touchy-feely person…so sue him. Sanji would push him off if he wanted. However, the blond did no such thing. In fact, he imperceptibly leant into the touch and that was enough for Ace to press on.

"Hey," he called softly. "What's up?"

Sanji closed his eyes, his hand holding his cigarette slipping to his side. A moment later, gave a small shake of his head, stood straighter inadvertently knocking off Ace's hand and took another drag.

"It's _not_ a good idea." He said finitely. His tone suggested that it was not up for debate, but Ace had always been rather prone to debating.

"Actually, I think it's a fucking _great_ idea."

He stood tall, his eyes boring into the singular blue one that was doing it's best not to look afraid or unsure. He continued.

"Who the fuck cares about what happened?" He felt Sanji stiffen. "It's in the past. It can't be changed." He could tell that his words weren't really helping, in fact, Sanji seemed even more on edge and Ace was racking his brain trying to figure out what he could say to make it better.

Then out of nowhere, it hit him.

Sanji already knew all of this. He'd probably known it for _years_ before all of them. This was probably the whole big reason for why he hadn't kept in contact with any of them throughout the years. He didn't need Ace's 'hakuna matata' moment, he needed some support.

"You know," he started slowly. " _I_ don't care." He paused as Sanji glanced at him as if searching for the truth in those words.

"I'm not judging you." He affirmed and watched as Sanji sucked in a breath. Something in Sanji's eyes sent him mixed signals, but he went on, trying to show his complete support for his friend.

"Things were really shitty those last couple of months for you. I don't care if you cheated or not. I don't care if Leo's some alien from outer space that landed on your balcony one night. I care about _you_ … _now…_ not what happened then."

Sanji dropped the nearly finished cigarette and let it die out on the cement. A hand awkwardly brushed through his hair and he finally spoke.

"It's…complicated…" Was all he managed to get out. Whether he was talking about the break up, or the game night or tonight, Ace didn't know but he knew one thing. The look Sanji had on his face now, was not one of guilt, but of despair. He wasn't denying cheating on Zoro, but just like the silent swordsman, Sanji was a rather private person when it came to his own problems…so perhaps…it wasn't so inconceivable that the reason he hadn't spoken out in his defense was the fact that he hadn't wanted to share his troubles with the whole gang, especially after only seeing them all again after four years of silence.

With that realisation a genuine smile settled on the pyrotechnician's lips. Things weren't as clear as it seemed. Maybe Sanji had cheated and maybe Leo was a result of that, but for now no one knew for sure except Sanji and right now he didn't trust them enough to share his secrets with them. And in the end, who did it really matter for? The only one who could say they were _really_ affected by whether or not it was true, was Zoro. For the rest of them, they had a choice. They didn't know all of Sanji's secrets, but they could choose whether they wanted to be his friend or not, cheater or no. It was their choice. Each individually. He wouldn't hide behind the shield of 'how would Zoro feel' -that was exactly the problem Sanji had confessed to worrying over and the reason why he'd cut all contact with them in the first place. If he truly felt that Sanji had been and still was his friend, then his relationship with Zoro shouldn't have anything to do with it, especially since it was obvious that there had been no malicious intent behind either one's actions all those years ago. Even if there was, was it really any of his business now?

"Screw complicated." Ace finally spat out with half a laugh and delighted in the completely shocked look the younger man couldn't conceal at the strange words.

"It's decided. I'm gonna pick you up. We're gonna get all the groceries you need, you're gonna make a delicious spread and then we're going to smash everyone at every game we play on Saturday!" He ended with a huge beaming grin directed at his shocked friend and couldn't help but grin wider when the blond finally let out a soft chuckle of his own before reciprocating the same grin back.

"Alright then." The blond smiled softly. "If you say so."

* * *

The keys jangling in the lock had him pausing in the hallway, glass of water in hand; no doubt it was the eggplant. In the moonlight, his old eyes searched out for the Seiko clock that stood over the mantelpiece. The trusty old thing read one fourty-three and Zeff felt his eyebrow raise. Either the eggplant was getting old, or things didn't go so well with the gang considering the godawful hours the bastard used to drag himself home at years ago.

The blond was shuffling off his shoes and Zeff entertained himself with the thought of spooking the bejeebers out of his son when the kid finally realised he was standing there. No doubt there'd be cursing aplenty but getting one over on the savvy boy had always been a pleasure of his. Still, he didn't have all bloody night.

Sanji had paused, shoes shucked off, but he rested his head against the shoe cupboard as if steadying himself. Surely, the kid hadn't gone weak to alcohol while in France... If there was one thing Zeff prided himself on, it was the fact that despite there being no blood relation between them, he'd taught Sanji to hold his liquor well. Fucking GE-netics, to hell with what the scientific quacks had to say. Finally, Sanji flicked on the hallway light, raised his head and nearly fucking screamed when he looked up to lock eyes with him.

" _What the FU-ck-ING hell, old man! You trying to give me a heart attack!_ " The rapid burst of half yelled, half whispered French cascaded from his lips as the blond clutched at his heart leaning against the shoe cupboard for support.

Zeff let out a snort, somewhat proud that Sanji hadn't screamed and woken up the little tyke and partly disappointed that the kid hadn't hollered his head off as if he were in a horror film like the good ol' days when he was catching the stupid minor slinking back inside after one of his stupid hooligan stunts. The burst of French was nostalgic though. It was a true testament that he'd caught his son off-guard when the kid used French in Japan. Generally, Sanji tried to stick with Japanese when in Japan it had been one of Zeff's rules when they'd first moved here. He'd been concerned that the eggplant would have a hard time fitting in on the social scene in good ol' Nihon, and he had been right. Using Japanese at home had been his attempt at trying to help Sanji get used to his surroundings and a year later, the kid was pretty damn fluent.

Zeff watched on now as his boy dragged a hand down his face muttering curses under his breath in their native tongue. Clearly, something had happened tonight that had shaken him, no mere spook in the dark could illicit this much tension on its own.

"Kid, you alright there?" He taunted but inwardly cursed himself. Even _he_ could hear the real concern in his voice with that question. Sanji and he had never really been the type to be super upfront about their emotions, rather they danced around their feelings with teasing jabs and curses and kicks. Even so, they had their rare moments where their walls came down and they opened up to each other…fully…honestly.

The look on Sanji's face made him think they needed one such moment now.

Sanji sucked in a breath and forced on a smile before he spoke.

"It's _fine_ old man." He started. "Get to fucking bed already, it's late."

Zeff's eyes narrowed as he watched lithe fingers rub over the eggplant's tired eyes as he walked over to the kitchen. Not one to be so easily dismissed he followed, entering the room as the lights flickered on. Sanji was already at the sink pouring himself a glass of water and chugging it down. If he was aware of Zeff's presence he was trying not to confront it but after all the shit the kid had been through the last couple years, Zeff knew better than to let Sanji sit and stew in his own thoughts. He took a seat at the table stretching his legs out in front of him. The idiot was self-depreciating to the max and it often only got worse when he was left alone. Luckily, Leo had given Sanji some sense of purpose in his life, but even with that ray of sunshine, Sanji still found ways to hate himself for his past actions…or inactions. Sick of the silence, Zeff decided to start the conversation.

"Thought you lot'd be out later. Back in the ol' days you'd only be crawling in at four or so."

Sanji let out a huff of a laugh.

"I think my liver'd kill me if I tried that now."

A genuine smirk fell across Zeff's lips. "You're years too young to be saying that, stupid eggplant."

A light huff of acceptance was all the response he got along with a small sincere smile. Sanji's eyes weren't focused on anything, he just stared off, listening, talking but not really focusing.

"So what happen? Your stupid monkey friend trash the place or something? Hightailed it out of there before you'd foot the bill?"

The small smile grew and Zeff inwardly patted himself on the back. Poking fun at Sanji's crazy friends had always been one thing the two of them had enjoyed together.

"It was Robin's bar, old man." Sanji drawled before he took another sip of water. "No way she'd let the idiot get that far."

Zeff hummed in agreement. "That one always did have a good head on her shoulders."

Silence fell between them again before Zeff prodded once more.

"So, what's got you so into your own head?"

The question shook the young man out of his daze and finally their eyes locked.

"It's fi-"

"-Don't, tell me it's fine." Zeff interjected. He let out a soft sigh as he lowered his voice. "You've gotta stop keeping this shit to yourself, Sanji." He advised.

For a long moment, he thought that Sanji had decided to block him out. Then after a few minutes he spoke.

"Nami's pretty good at math."

The statement was out of the blue, but instead of getting impatient, he waited, knowing that the silence would prod Sanji to continue more than anything else.

"It's not really difficult, counting nine months and all, but for some reason I just... _deluded_ myself that none of them would ever think it, or figure it out or…I don't fucking know…"

Zeff sighed inwardly. Of course, it had to be about fucking this again. He'd tried to get Sanji to just be upfront, tell the others about Leo. The only person Sanji was causing pain to was himself, and all for a stupid bloody reason that was miles away from him in France at the moment. Still, this was probably a time to be soft in his approach. Sanji was probably beating himself up enough as it is.

"It's not like it's secret knowledge, eggplant." He stated giving the young blond a pointed look. "Facts are facts and can't be hidden." He paused at the look of panic that flooded his son's face and knew he'd opened up a whole new can of worms now with those words. Narrowing his eyes, he stood, his prosthetic giving him a little grief but he'd be damned if he worried about it now. Sanji was fucking himself over in his mind again and he needed the kid to understand that what was done was done and he and Leo were safe now. He hobbled over around the bar to stand in front of the kid gathering his attention.

"It's all fine, eggplant." He said, his tone brokering no debate. "You're in Japan, miles from France. The _gendarme_ are searching for leads, they know the story. The paperwork checks out. Leo's yours, he'd not going anywhere."

A shuddering breath was all the warning he got before an armful of sniffling blond was pressed up against him, clutching him, holding him tight. Zeff found himself patting down smooth golden locks and murmuring nonsensical reassurances to his big kid.

His big kid that had been t hrough a lot.

Surely, life wasn't fair, and never was it truer than for this poor soul crying in his arms. The old sea farer just stood firm, trying to be a rock for this poor kid that had the worst luck of the draw in this shitty game of life.

And yet, as the tears calmed down and the breaths stopped shuddering and sniffling, Zeff knew that this little eggplant was strong enough to take it all on…and win.

"Things will be ok, eggplant." He murmured. "You'll see."

* * *

Uploaded 19th of June 2018

Yeah...so this is gonna probably turn into a monthly thing... I've really underestimated how busy the transitions periods between the terms are here in Japan. I mean I guess they're the same elsewhere, but the several layers of communication that are needed here just to approve 1 subject's schedule baffles me!

In any case, I hope you enjoyed this chapter...I'm still keeping a few secrets, but I've been so glad reading all your theories :) It really makes my day that there are people who are invested in this story, so thanks for all the reviews, faves and follows! It really means a lot!

Guest: Thanks for your review! Haha, yeah, I'm usually kind of bad at cliffhangers, but I was happy with how this one worked out, don't worry, I expect that things will be revealed soon enough! Thank you for your kind words! It really means a lot to hear them!

Guest (2): Thank you! I'm very glad that you'd put me up that high! Makes me blush a little! Hope you enjoyed this chappie!

Fairykick: Yeah, I really wanted to play with the ambiguity and drama about Leo and his mother since for a while it's where most of the tension is!

Raigon: Good to see you again! Haha, sorry about the cliff-hanger, usually not good at it, but it just worked out so well that last chapter...

Siriana2526: Welcome! Thanks for you review! Thanks for adding in your theory!

yukino76: Thanks for reviewing! Yeah, to be honest, she'd not _really_ one of my favourtie characters. I mean don't get me wrong, her backstory made me cry buckets for her, but it really doesn't justify a lot of her actions later on in the anime / manga. In any case, I try not to be too harsh with her, as I hope you can see with this chapter. But by the same token, I don't like to just 'excuse' her behaviour (tbh, its a pet peeve of mine in other fics...)

Guest (3): Thanks for leaving a review! I'm loving all these theories!

Subaru's dreams: Glad to have you here again! I love your reviews! I feel the personality in them! Haha! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and the insight into Sanji's inner turmoil. I think it's one of my fav character traits about Sanji - his self-sacrificing mode. He's totally the type to always think of others first and honestly, the whole backstory arc...it made me cry buckets (also freaked me out a little cause I have a plot line for a story I made YEARS ago -not published- that had Sanji secretly be an actual PRINCE from a destroyed country sooo that was weird)... Sorry for rambling... thanks for reviewing!

Shadkit: Thank you for your kind review! I'm always glad to hear that people like my writing style and find it engaging, so thanks!


	8. Chapter Eight

CHAPTER EIGHT

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

The sun shone down warming the earth. A cool breeze fluttered through the green leaves and sakura flowers causing many of the precious petals to fall. Children's cheers echoed in the background as families sat on their picnic mats enjoying the sakura season in all of its fleeting glory. All in all, it was a wonderfully beautiful day. That, however, was hardly taken into account by the moping Frenchman currently seated on the park bench as his son ran about enjoying the beautiful day.

Sanji sighed heavily as he rubbed his face. He still couldn't believe that he'd cried in front of Zeff like that. He was supposed to be an adult. How the hell did he let himself sink that low? He was still too embarrassed to face Zeff properly even though that was already two days ago. He'd been avoiding eye contact only making small talk conversation. He could sense the old man's eyes lingering on him studying his emotions like he used to do when Sanji was a teen. The old dog thought himself rather sly but Sanji had grown used to his tricks. It was how they could still function together as family with all the cursing and kicking they dished out to one another. Still, just being aware of Zeff's concern wasn't enough to make Sanji feel any less like crawling into a hole and dying from embarrassment. Luckily, one of the advantages of having a kid was using their needs as an excuse to avoid people and right now, Leo _needed_ to be at a park enjoying himself so Sanji could be sitting on a park bench avoiding his old man instead of facing his issues.

"Look _papa!_ _Une feuille bizarre!"_ The chatter broke him out of his thoughts just in time for the bright green Japanese maple leaf to be thrust almost up his nose. Still, the bright grin on Leo's face had him ignoring this fact and returning the smile.

"Yes, it's weird but a very pretty 'ha'."

"'Ha'…" Leo repeated with a curious look on his face. "The same as teeth?"

Sanji chuckled at the cute mistake. Japanese was terribly difficult with all it's homophones. Luckily, Leo took them all in stride and learnt to accept the rules for what they were. Smiling and confirming the thought with a small explanation he once more felt the mantle of accomplishment settled over his shoulders. He felt good that Leo would grow up here without all the problems he had to endure as a teenager himself.

Catching sight of Leo looking wistfully at a picnicking family Sanji shook himself from his thoughts.

"What's wrong, Leo?"

His young son swiveled around to face him a bright smile on his face.

"I want to go on a picnic too!" With his beaming smile and excited face Sanji felt his heart melt again.

"Of course, _mon chère._ It's been a while hasn't it?" Leo simply nodded and hummed in agreement. "In Japan, people have special picnics at this time of year."

"Special picnics?" Leo asked starry-eyed. Sanji chuckled lightly and brushed back some of his son's unruly hair.

"Yes, they call it _Hanami_."

"Ha-na-mi." Leo repeated with a large grin.

"Yes." Sanji smiled in confirmation. "They have picnics under the beautiful _sakura_ trees. Do you remember which ones are sakura trees?"

"The pink ones!" Leo exclaimed with a bounce. Sanji laughed along and praised his boy for his good memory.

"Yep. So we can go and do _hanami_ together."

"Now?" The little tyke questioned with an adorable tilt of his head.

Sanji chuckled lightly as he patted him on the head.

"No. Papa needs time to make us a bento."

"Tomorrow, then!" Leo exclaimed excitedly as his nudged himself between his father's legs resting all his weight on the strong appendages. Sanji couldn't help the full feeling in his heart at the eager face his son wore. He'd do anything to keep him smiling like that.

"Alright." He acquiesced. "Tomorrow we can do hanami." Leo's answering grin and whoop of excitement warmed his heart and he looped his arms behind his kid prompting the little mischief maker to lean back using Sanji's arms to keep him from falling. Sanji couldn't help the chuckle that left his lips. Kids were so crazy sometimes. He didn't understand half of the thoughts that ran though his kid's head, let alone what prompted these ridiculous motions of hanging off people and blindly trusting they wouldn't let you fall. Still, that was probably the prerogative of being a child. Your trust in the world and the people that look after you had not been broken yet. Sadly, in his own life, that trust had been broken far too early on.

Still, his own morbid past aside, he took great joy in watching Leo love life. It made him feel like he had a purpose in his own life – a reason to live. Something beyond himself. His musings were interrupted by a familiar rough voice in a gentle mocking tone.

"Ah, so the clinginess _does_ run in the family."

Sanji's head whipped up as Leo righted himself, both exclaiming at the same time.

"Zoro!"

That memorable tanned face unfurled a smirk at the duo's synchronization.

"Oh, and talking at the same time too, I see!" He teased further. Leo wriggled out from his father's arms and ran towards his new friend chattering away.

"Zoro! You came to the park too?" The little kid caught sight of the convenience store bag in the older man's hand and circled round to the side. "You having a picnic?" He asked.

The swordsman squatted to be somewhat eye level with the kid before he spoke.

"Nah, I was just going for a snack. It's a pretty hot day. Got ice-cream."

"ICE-CREAM?" The kid shouted with wide glistening blue eyes staring up at him. Zoro immediately knew that look. It was uncanny seeing it on the chibi version of his former lover, but he knew that he was a goner. He could never say no to those expectant eyes.

"Yeah kid. Melon Soda. Want it?"

Leo shouted his willingness just as Sanji finally decided to interfere spluttering embarrassedly at Leo's impoliteness. However, the tall swordsman was already one step ahead unwrapping the ice-cream and handing it over to the soon to be four-year-old. The chef's complaints turned to sighs as his kid immediately set about going to town on the offered icy treat. Giving up, he dragged a hand down his face and leant back into the bench. His heart was thudding wildly in his chest as it seemed to do every time Zoro was in close proximity. It was unnerving…and with his nerves already frazzled because of Thursday's debacle and crying on Zeff and all that…well, he found himself slightly drained at the prospect of finally talking one on one with the green haired man, it had been too long. That train of thought caused him to stiffen. The last time they'd been in the same room together, he'd been accused of cheating. Nami in her not so subtle round about way had made sure that the possibility of his infidelity was public knowledge around the group.

He never wanted to shrivel up and die more than now. However, familiar childish chatter stirred him from his dark thoughts and he berated his selfishness. Leo was excitedly recounting his day so far to Zoro, the older man patiently listening and teasing along the way. What were his own problems when taking that bundle of joy into account? Like a warm blanket, the realisation that nothing else was as important as Leo's happiness settled upon him. Suddenly, his problems with the group, Zoro, Law, Zeff…the mess in France…it all was meaningless. He smiled happily as he gazed at his son chattering off his ex's ear. And he felt…surprisingly ok with watching it happen.

The green haired man chatted with the tiny kid for a while before the two of them came to sit on the bench next to the frazzled blond.

As Leo occupied himself by demolishing the ice-cream, Zoro flicked his eyes to blond on the other side of the kid. He was looking fondly at his boy listening to him chatter about how tasty it was with the indulgent smile of a parent. He hadn't been expecting to meet them both on his way back home but he couldn't help but feel like luck was on his side. He still wasn't sure what to think since Thursday night, but he could never say no to this kid's honest face. His mind was thrown for what seemed like the thousandth time. Ever since he'd learned that Sanji was back, his feelings had been all up in the air. He'd never felt so indecisive since his first year of university when he had been deciding whether or not to ask out Sanji. Of course, everything had to revolve around the blond. All of his happiest and saddest memories were in some way, shape or form shared with the eccentric man.

Leo asked something about the flavour and Sanji set about explaining the fascination of melon flavoured things in Japan switching between Japanese and French when the explanations got too much. At the same time, he was rummaging in his bag pulling out wet wipes that would surely come in handy seeing the green liquid oozing down Leo's hands. It was just like the cook to teach his kid about food and their origins at such an early age. He could imagine them sitting over dinner, Sanji pointing out what each part of their meal was and why it was important to know that _this particular fish_ was from the waters of _Australia_ and therefore superior quality to the low-brow brand offered for half its price at the local market.

Just as he used to do with him.

Suddenly, a thought struck him and he turned to face his former lover.

"I uh, I'm sorry if you didn't want him to have it. I mean if he has a strict diet or something, I wasn't thinki-"

"-It's fine, Zoro." Sanji interjected as he finally gave into his urges and pulled out a wet wipe, swiping away at his son's disgustingly sticky fingers. The kid, to his credit, just kept on eating totally accustomed to his father's persnickety habits.

"Leo's not really on any strict diet or anything. I mean, I watch what he eats to make sure he's mostly eating healthy but he shouldn't have just accepted your ice-cream like that. It's not polite."

The last words were said with a soft pointed look at his son who had enough awareness to look a little sheepish. Evidently, Sanji had done well in instilling manners in his kid, but even that was no match for the bond between a child and an ice-cream.

"It's no big deal." Zoro confirmed. "He's probably enjoying it more than I would anyway."

"Yes!" Leo cheered in agreement.

Still Sanji gave his kid an exasperated look as he went on. "Even so, Leo. What if Zoro really wanted the ice-cream but was just being nice in offering it to you? Remember when we talked about sharing toys and our things with others?"

Leo nodded and turned to Zoro.

"Wanna have some?" He chirruped. And Zoro had to hold back a laugh at Sanji's groan.

"That's not what I meant, _mon chère_." Sanji chastised lightly and curious blue eyes turned to lock on his own in confusion. "You need to ask those things before you slobber all over the ice-cream." Sanji cooed as he took his chance to dive in with a wet wipe and mop the sticky sweet off his son's face.

Zoro chuckled as Leo squirmed, his heart warmed by the two blond's antics.

"Kid, you've got a good papa, alright." The words left his mouth before he'd even processed them and his eye flicked up in panic catching Sanji's own shocked ones.

"Yup!" Leo confirmed. "He's the best! Papa, I'm finished!" He chimed holding out the sticky popsicle stick to his father.

Sanji broke eye contact and busied himself with putting the stick in a rubbish bag and wiping his son's hands and mouth once more, but Zoro could see the telltale hints of a blush on that beautiful pale skin and the way he made sure his gaze never locked on Zoro's own confirmed that he was flattered by the swordsman's offhanded comment and probably his son's confirmation too. That in turn, made him feel less stupid for simply blurting out his thoughts. If he could still make Sanji blush like that, then maybe all was not lost.

"Ne, ne, Zoro!" The blond kid chirruped turning to his new friend.

"Zoro-ojisan, Leo." Sanji scolded lightly. "Be polite."

"Oh please." Zoro started with a scoff as he caught his ex's eye. "I much prefer just Zoro. I'm not _that_ old."

Leo looked confusedly between the two of them before Sanji sighed and nodded. "Well, you have permission now, Leo. Isn't that nice?"

The kid beamed and started again. "You know what, Zoro?" He sing-songed.

"No, what?" Zoro replied with an automatic smile and chuckle.

"Papa's taking me to hanami!"

The exuberant cheer broke a smile on both adults faces. Those shining eyes made their hearts full and the day seem brighter.

"Taking you to _do_ hanami, Leo." Sanji corrected lightly.

"Aren't you lucky then." Zoro said fondly causing Leo to giggle and blush a little.

"Zoro, do you like hanami?" Wide shining eyes glanced up at him with excitement.

"Yeah," Zoro started. "I do."

The already hyper excited face seemed to explode with more energy and he surprised both adults by sliding off the bench and turning to face them. Both Zoro and Sanji glanced at one another briefly before Leo's puppy dog eyes were turned full force on them.

"Zoro should come to our hanami!"

Zoro smiled at the kid's excited face. To be quite honest with himself, he wanted to say yes to the invite immediately. He already was having a lot of fun chatting with the two blonds just now and a whole day tomorrow might be just the time to finally get some answers from Sanji…and a good time to apologise for his own actions four years ago. He surreptitiously looked at the older blond before he gave any answer to the kid. Sanji looked a little unsure but when Leo caught the adult exchange and glanced up at his papa with expectant eyes, the chef caved and gave a small nod to Zoro.

"Sure kiddo." Zoro smiled. "I'd love to do hanami with you guys." The happy cheer and wriggle dance brought a smile to both adults faces.

"It's tomorrow!"

"So soon!" Zoro laughed as he quirked an eyebrow at his ex who sheepishly shrugged back.

"Is it a bad time-?"

"Nah, not at all." He confirmed. Sanji simply hummed as they both watched Leo dance a little happy dance.

"I can't say no to him when he uses his puppy dog eyes." Sanji confided.

A beat passed before Zoro responded. "I get the feeling. Reminds me of a certain blond's mysterious eye power."

The way blue eyes slid to catch his and the slight start in his posture made a genuine smile stretch out over the swordsman's face. Memories of times he'd conceded to his lover's beautiful blue eyes seemed to flash between the two of them before they both abruptly turned away. The mood had quickly gotten intense as it seemed it was only the two of them left in the world.

Leo's antics had tired him out and he flopped all over his papa's legs once more a healthy flush on his chubby cheeks.

"Tomorrow we hanami with Zoro!" He sang.

Secretly the two adults found themselves excitedly looking forward to their meeting tomorrow.

* * *

The weight of the convenience store bag helped to ground him as he practically waltzed…that's right… _waltzed_ through the park. The day was breezy but warm; the sun doing its job well that sunny midday. Zoro felt a little proud of himself if he were to admit it but the caramel pudding he'd bought from the convenience store felt like a good step to getting Leo's approval. After all, it was Chopper's favourite brand and the little doctor was a sweets maniac, if he liked it, surely the kid would. Last night it struck him that this time round he wasn't wooing just Sanji, he had to make sure his kid liked him too. It was kind of hard for Zoro to come to terms with but he'd managed. He realised if he wanted Sanji to spend the rest of his life with him, the kid had to like him too. And some warm squishy part of him conjured up images of the three of them being a family and Leo calling him tou-san. He wasn't quite ready to admit how fanciful that notion was. He could tell that Sanji was hella protective of his boy so despite it being somewhat deceitful, he'd come to the conclusion he would have to ply the kid with gifts first. Also, seeing that it was Leo who had orchestrated this _date_ between the two of them, the kid deserved a reward and pudding was as good as the rest.

So that's how he found himself strolling through the park in his fancy jeans and a Ralph Lauren shirt that Nami had insisted he wear in lieu of his 'daggy' clothes for fancy-ish events. Not that there were that many in the life of a swordsman, but every now and then he had TV or magazine interviews and while he refused to dress up for them, Nami refused to let him go to any of them 'looking like a hobo'. It may have been a little ridiculous putting on his good jeans for a dumb picnic, but in his mind, this was the step he'd been searching for in finally talking with Sanji. He'd been wanted to finally meet and talk for a long time and sure, having a picnic with his son wasn't the right place, but it was a time where he could ask for that talk without nosy friends or imposing adopted fathers ruining the moment. It was damned hard to talk to Sanji about their break up when all their friends were hanging on to hear every word. In the past four years, he hadn't said much about the events surrounding their break up. The one person he would open up to was not in for that kind of drama and he wouldn't have Luffy any other way. He'd told the bare minimum and had taken the blame for it even though despite their attempts at hiding it, he knew the others had their own wild theories about why exactly the blond left.

Right now, things were a little unclear. For the longest time, Zoro had felt solely responsible for what happened and he still held out… _hope?..._ that he was correct in that. For some reason, the idea of Sanji cheating on him seemed worse than Zoro not keeping his promises to the blond, then he realised it was the same. They'd both broken promises if that were the case but in the two days that had passed since Nami's revelation, Zoro had thought and thought about it and had surprised himself with the realisation that it didn't really matter to him.

Which was terrifying in its own way.

Zoro had prided himself as a man of loyalty. He never broke oaths and said what he meant and meant what he said. Likewise, he fully expected exclusivity, loyalty in a relationship, something he'd promised Sanji and had had returned to him. He was the type of guy to stick to his word. However, he could admit to himself that that wasn't always true. During the months before their break up, he'd broken one of his first promises he'd ever made to his blond lover.

Just trying to date the blond had been its own trial. It had been no easy task convincing Sanji to give him a chance. At first, he had thought that it was because he was a guy but quickly realised that Sanji's morals were much more relaxed than the stringent Japanese upbringing he had had. In fact, what he came to realise was that Sanji had been abandoned many times. By family. By lovers. By 'friends'. The blond had troubles trusting people because most of his experiences had ended up with him being hurt and that made his gesture to finally trust Zoro with his heart all the more important to Zoro. And he'd promised. He'd promised to never let Sanji be lonely again. He'd promised to always be there, always listen and always find a way…together.

Then he'd broken it.

And not just once…multiple times. At the time it was easy to explain away. 'I need to focus on my kendo technique, I won't be home for dinner', 'Mihawk only comes to this part of Japan once I year, I have to train now, it's my only chance' And Sanji had always been…supportive. But when was it that his genuine smile started to become forced…when did he stop sharing his true thoughts…when did start to beg for Zoro to pay attention to him and his needs…and get rejected every time…

It was one of the main reasons he hated talking about his relationship with Sanji. He had failed him. In more ways than one.

Sakura petals danced on the breeze reminding him of the spring he finally came to exist in the same realm as the effervescent cook.

He had never wanted someone as much as he had wanted Sanji at first sight. Nami had teased him, laughing at the way he had bowled the thin blond over with such force, but as soon has his eyes had connected with sapphire blue ones he knew that the soul within this person was supposed to be with him. A few minutes later, after being thoroughly cursed out by the blond Adonis he was sure of it. That fire! That strength! It made something rise up within him that he'd never felt before. He'd managed to convince himself that it was simply the need to protect but that theory came crashing down the moment he'd met the doctor in training, Tony Tony Chopper. The immense need to keep the kid from harm rose within him, but it felt nothing like the longing he had for a certain French blond chef. He'd quickly put two and two together and realised that the Frenchman was special. As he got to know the cook, he fell in love with his passion and zest for life. They both had goals, big ones and he couldn't think of anything more exciting than walking through life together, supporting each other to find and finish all their ambitions.

It had been a long half a year. Showing up at the Baratie, chatting at the university and finally on their summer trip to Okinawa he took the plunge…and immediately was rejected. No one, not even their friends knew the whole story of their get together. Sanji wasn't the kind of gossiper that got off on putting others down, but day one at Okinawa, Zoro had had his heart broken. Sanji had been polite, but firm. No relationship between the two of them. They'd carried on as normal. Or at least he had hoped so, he'd always felt Luffy had been extra clingy to him and also distracting the others, but one could never tell with the monkey kid. It wasn't until their second last night there that he had been alone with Sanji again. He'd been trying to give Sanji his space – so as not to weird him out – but also to give himself some time to heal a little bit. Though it turned out that Sanji had been watching him more than he had been watching Sanji. The cook had tentatively struck up a conversation. It started light...weather, or whatever dumb shit – he couldn't remember. They were sat next to each other, in the boathouse, the others were spread between sitting at the beach house they'd rented and going to get alcohol. It had an amazing view of the full moon and the sound of the ocean poured in through the open window with a cool summer night breeze. But then the blond had said something and for once Zoro felt like he heard an underlying question.

 _'What could you possibly see in me?'_

Sanji was definitely too proud to have said something like that aloud, but Zoro felt as if he heard it shouted. He had no idea where he started or if it even made sense in their flow of conversation, but he simply started listing off all the things he loved about Sanji while staring at the moon. It wasn't until he heard a small sniffle that he turned to look at his companion.

It was a sight that was forever ingrained in his memory.

Sanji, like himself, was seated staring at the moon but his gorgeous eyes had filled with tears. Although he tried to hide as much of his face as he could with his arms folded upon his bent knees, he couldn't disguise the fact that he was crying. Too embarrassed to show his face, but too proud to hide it completely away. When Zoro had stopped, Sanji had raised the long sleeve of his loose summer pullover to wipe at his eyes as he finally turned to face the swordsman.

 _"But that's not really me."_

The words had been uttered with such despair and longing. And Zoro understood. Sanji couldn't believe Zoro loved him because he didn't realise just how amazing he was.

 _"No, it really is. You just don't see how amazing you are…but it's ok. I see it and I love it."_

Fresh tears had fallen and Zoro had instinctively reached out to catch the glistening diamonds. At the last minute he realised Sanji probably wouldn't appreciate the contact but was surprised to find the blond leaning his head into his palm and Zoro's own eyes widened. He could not say what possessed him to confess again, having already been rejected but he did just that. Sanji had just let out a watery chuckle as he answered.

 _"Are you sure? I'm not the easiest to handle…you'll probably wish to be rid of me in a week or so."_

Zoro remembered the tightening in his heart as he heard his beloved belittle himself like that. And he promised. Sanji couldn't get rid of him that easy. He wouldn't let him be lonely. He'd always be there. They'd always find their way together.

The watery smile and the tentative brush of cool lips against his own engraved itself into his heart as the first time Zoro felt completely full in his life. The night that ensued was forever something he held close. A promise of an eternity together. A man he would never fail.

But he had failed him.

And now he was trying to pick up the pieces of a shattered heart and realised with great sorrow that some of the pieces weren't of his own heart, but of the man he had wished to protect from such grief. So, with the memory of that night stuck in his mind he went on today.

It wouldn't be easy. He didn't expect it to be so. After all, the shattered shards of his one true love were on his hands and they required the time and energy to carefully, painstakingly put them back together with all the love and care he could give. If he got cut along the way, that was his own fault for breaking such a treasure in the first place.

He was nearing the area they'd arranged to meet at and a sudden bout of nervousness gripped him. It was laughable. He'd been stressing over meeting Sanji for days. He'd agonized over what their future could hold and finally when he came to a firm resolve to _do_ something…he was getting panicked. An excited youthful cheer broke him from his thoughts and he swung his head in the direction of the sound to catch sight of a little blond monkey running towards him.

He bent down in time to catch him in his arms and instinctively raised him up to swing him round in the air. The kid's joyful squeals nearly burst his eardrums but he couldn't help but smile along with a small chuckle.

"You miss me, monkey boy?" Zoro teased as he lowered the child once more to the ground. Ignoring the question, the young boy rested his arms on Zoro's strong ones as he squatted in front of him.

"You took ages!" He scolded, looking every bit like the cook but in miniature. " _Grand-père_ , papa and I have been waiting for _ages!_ " The kid exaggerated.

Zoro's eyes widened ever so slightly in shock as his head shot up to look in the direction the boy had run from. Just like the kid had said, along with Sanji sitting on a tarp under a beautiful sakura tree, was old man Zeff. Zoro felt an uncomfortable lump form in his throat. He hadn't been expecting Zeff to be here today and he suddenly felt like a teenage boy under the watchful eye of his boyfriend's parents once more. He could make out Zeff's less-than-impressed look from here and expected that any second an insult would be heading his way.

"-Oi, lazy broccoli, 'bout time you showed up. Get over here so we can eat!"

Yup. Same old Zeff.

Leo, oblivious to the daggers sent to the green haired man by his beloved grandpa, simply grabbed Zoro's hand that wasn't holding the plastic bag and began tugging him back to the picnic mat. Sanji and Zeff had started pulling out loads of Tupperware and four small traditional bento boxes. As they finally approached the mat the little tyke let go of him and rushed to his _grand-père's side._ The old seafarer welcomed him with a one arm hug before quietly requesting him to sit down and wipe his hands so they could all start eating. Zoro blinked stunned as he reached the group. He'd never seen Zeff so…un-grumpy before. Even when he had been talking to Sanji, the man didn't hold back on his cuss words or quietly explain things in a parental manner. In fact, he'd only seen Zeff ridicule his son's life choices (namely his fashion sense and taste in women) and growl and scowl at the blond every time the young man did something the old chef was proud of. Seeing as he'd become quite aware of how sensitive Sanji could be once they started dating, he had always thought it to be the result of Zeff's own incapability of soft emotions. He figured that Zeff just didn't know how to _not_ be grouchy. But there he was, acting like – dare he say it – a _real_ grandfather with _all_ the attributes; kind but firm, gentle and educating, patient and a good listener. It'd hadn't even been a minute and Zoro felt like his whole world explanation was on the brink of destruction.

Everything he knew was a lie.

" –can sit here…Zoro?"

The sound of his name shook him from his existential crisis and he turned to lock eyes with the young chef who was giving him a concerned look. His brain finally catching up with what his ex had said, he nodded with a small smile and sat in the empty space between Leo and Sanji.

The three of them had chosen the perfect spot. The tree they were under was magnificent, its flowers mostly blossoming with some of the early bloomers already losing their petals to dance in the light breeze. Their vantage point on the top of the hill gave them the entertainment of looking at all the other hanami picnickers below as well as the incredible show of the sakura petal dances happening beneath them.

Leo began excitedly chattering at him from his left side, recounting excitedly just how _early_ they had woken up to come and claim this spot and how it made him so excited and how _no one_ else had been here in the park when they had come. Each word uttered from the child's mouth made Zoro feel guilty about coming just now…had he mistaken the time? As if tuned into his inner turmoil, Sanji lightly tapped his arm with one of the bento boxes for him to grab. Taking it out of reflex, he listened as the blond spoke quietly.

"Don't worry, Zoro. Zeff just wanted to get Leo the _perfect_ spot for hanami." The statement was accompanied by a slight roll of the eyes but the tone was endearing and sappy. He was about to whisper back when Zeff interrupted.

"I don't seem to recall you having any objections, eggplant." Zeff's rough voice grouched over them. The man busied himself with arranging Leo's bento, pointedly not looking at either of the young men. "Who went out late last night to buy a _proper_ hanami mat, hmm?"

Sanji's face grew uncomfortable at the shock of being called out trying to pin all the blame of overzealousness on his old man and Zoro felt his heart melt at the idea of these two stubborn Frenchmen wanting to give this kid the best hanami experience he could have.

The brunch went on splendidly, Leo being the life of the party. The kid was so energetic and loved the attention he received from all three men which inspired more and more stories to be said. He'd been ridiculously excited when Zoro had pulled out the pudding specifically for him and scarfed it down like a ravenous kitten. Zeff's grumbles at spoiling the kid were ignored by all even the man himself. Today seemed to be all about spoiling the little cherub. When a stray ball rolled near their mat, the tyke's attention was taken and he went over to grab it catching sight of the kid who came to claim back his toy.

"Oh, here you go." Leo said politely as he handed the ball back. The kid ducked his head in thanks and took the ball before running off a little ways down the hill. All three adults watched as Leo looked on wistfully as the kid set about chattering to an older boy. It perhaps wasn't fair to consider him a boy, the young man looked to be about Chopper's age. After a little talk, the two began to head back over to the picnicking group. As they got near, it was clear that the man was not the same age as young chopper, probably the same age as themselves, possibly even older. The man spoke.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Gin. How do you do?"

"A pleasure, Gin. I'm Sanji." The blond spoke as he rose to greet the man properly and give him a handshake. Gin smiled and nudged the little kid next to him to prompt him to speak.

"Nice to meet you." The kid started softly looking directly at Leo. Another light nudge and he went on. "My name is Hideki. How do you do?" Leo's bright open smiled stretched across his face and he responded.

"Hi! My name is Leo. Nice to meet you!" He beamed.

As the kids finished their introduction Gin spoke.

"I hope you don't think it too forward of me, but we were wondering if Leo would like to come and play ball with us." Leo's eyes were practically brimming with excitement at the idea and Sanji smiled in response.

"Well, if you're all just playing where you and your son were now, I've no problems with it."

"Yeah, we'll be just there down the hill near our picnic blanket." Gin confirmed as he pointed off to their mat. "Hideki's my little brother." He said clarifying Sanji's assumption.

"Oh, I am sorry-" Sanji started.

"Nah, no problems at all. I always get that." Sanji smiled graciously and turned to Leo.

"Ok, Leo, you can go, but remember to share nicely." He said with a pointed look. The kid in question was too filled to the brim with excitement to register the slight judgment in that tone and agreed happily before running off down the hill with his new friends. Sanji stood for a while watching as the game started before he re-sat himself still keeping his eyes trained on his little troublemaker.

The kid was having a blast if his concentrated face and loud peals of laughter were anything to go by. Not five minutes had passed before Zeff began to stand up. Both of the younger males turned to look at him in surprise.

"Well, it's about that time I head off." Zeff said by way of explanation.

Sanji nodded and began clearing the already neatly stacked Tupperware in front of the ex-sailor. Catching Zoro's quizzical eyes, the man seemed to get gruff once more.

"What, you think I'm the same as you lazy lay-abouts; free to spend the whole day picnicking like a ninny?" Stumped for words like he always was when Zeff insulted him, he floundered only to be saved by Sanji's sass.

"Quit your griping old man. You could've taken the day off too and that's your own fault." The two fell into the usual harmless bickering as Sanji stowed away Zeff's containers in his rather large basket and Zeff stretched out his legs.

"Leo! Come and say goodbye to _grand-père_ _!_ " Sanji called. The little boy's head shot up and he quickly chirped something to his playmates before bounding over and running into his _grand-père's_ arms giving the biggest hug he could for his small disposition. Zeff had lifted him up in the air and began speaking in a short burst of French at the boy. The kid chatted back in equally fast and confusing French before the old man placed a kiss on his forehead and let the boy down again. The sentimental gesture moved Zoro somehow. Zeff was never one for such affections with Sanji and he caught himself almost smiling widely at the gesture. He hid his grin before Zeff could accuse him of something sinister again. Sanji beckoned the kid to have some water before he returned to his game which he did before running off down the hill.

"Right, I'm off." The old seafarer nodded.

"See you later." Sanji replied.

"Nice seeing you again, Zeff." Zoro added in. A grunt and hum was the only response he got before the old man turned and hobbled down the hill to the park exit.

A moment or so passed in silence before the air grew uncomfortable.

"Sorry, I was late." Zoro decided to apologise.

"No. seriously, Zoro. Nothing to apologise for. You were here only like five minutes past the time we said. Last night, Leo was excitedly asking Zeff if he knew what hanami was and the old dog said it was where families got together at the arsecrack of dawn to find the best spot. He has some pretty damn old ideas about what the event entails. The waking up ridiculously early to find the _best_ spot was _his_ idea and Leo, unfortunately, took too it all too well."

"Ah, I see." Zoro started softly. "I was wondering how he got your tired arse out here so early on a weekend." The indignant splutter was reward enough for his sassy words and the accompanying grumble of complaints muttered through thin lips just made it all the more fun.

"Still going to give me shit, I see." Came the final comment from the blond before he took a sip of his tea.

It was said lightheartedly, the kind of way that friends conceded to each other's smart remarks but with all the uncertainty of their break up at the forefront of his mind, Zoro felt a tug at his heart.

"I didn't mean to hurt you."

There was a short pause where Sanji's eyes caught his own and then the blond was laughing off the whole thing.

"Geez, Zoro. Lighten up. I know you were joki-"

"I don't mean just now." Zoro cut in and once more silence descended on them. Sanji turned his attention to his son playing down the hill and Zoro felt like he had fucked up all over again. Unsure of how to make the situation better he sat in the silence berating himself for his unthinking words.

It was a couple minutes later that Sanji spoke. His eyes still trailed after his son but Zoro was captivated by his words.

"I know you didn't mean to." Sanji started softly. He practically whispered the words as if he were going to damage them by speaking too loudly. "All the same, we weren't good together by the end of it. I was too needy and we both had big dreams. It wasn't fair to expect you to deal with my problems as well. You had enough things to worry about on your own."

Though they were said to take away his stress every word thrust another dagger into his heart. Was this how Sanji looked back on their relationship? That he was too needy for Zoro? That he had put too much of a burden on him? His initial reaction was to deny it one hundred percent. It wasn't at all true! He loved Sanji and missed him terribly when he left. But his brain had shouted at him to not run his mouth. To simply sit and listen for once. Perhaps Sanji had a point – even though he was loathed to admit it. At the time, he _had_ acted annoyed at Sanji's actions. After all these years reflecting he realised how he was not there for Sanji when he needed him and how his own actions at the time would come across as being fed up with Sanji.

"We had good times." Sanji continued. "But in the end we just weren't that compatible were we?" The questioned was asked aloud and Zoro couldn't tell if the Frenchman intended it to be rhetorical or if he actually wanted a response. What he _did_ know was that this was the opening he was waiting for to finally take the plunge and tell Sanji how he felt…how he _still_ feels.

"No. I guess that we weren't." Zoro started calmly. Sanji was still focused on his son, but Zoro eyes were trained on him. He saw the ever so slight flinch of a sting at his own words. Perhaps the blond had wanted them contradicted but he wouldn't lie. "At the time, I was too selfish."

With those words the blond finally looked at him. No doubt out of complete surprise that he would say such a thing. That he would seem to take the blame for their failed relationship. Blue eyes searching his own he continued.

"You were stressed and worried. You kept trying to talk with me and I kept pushing you away. You were right that we weren't compatible at that time, but it's not because you were needy or anything. It was because I was too self-absorbed." He paused to take a breath. Suddenly looking into blue irises was the most terrifying thing. He didn't want to see the exact moment when Sanji realised he was too good for Zoro, but these were all words that needed to be said. Consequences be damned.

"I'd gotten complacent. I forgot the important things. I…took you for granted." Sanji started worrying his lip between his teeth. Obviously, he had something he wanted to say, but also couldn't bring himself to. Worried for the worst, he pressed on hoping to finish his apology before the blond could say the dreaded ' _it's ok, let's just be friends'_ phrase.

"I took for granted the idea that you'd always be there. That I'd…I don't know…unlocked that level, played the hard game and could come back to it anytime." He inwardly cringed at the lame metaphor but went on. "Those last months, I put myself before _us_ and in doing that…I hurt you."

Finally gaining the balls to look at his ex in the eyes once more he raised his head.

"Sanji. I've wanted to say for so long. I'm sorry."

He'd imagined tears. He'd imagined yelling. But the shocked silence was not one he'd really expected. It seemed to be that Sanji was floundering for a grasp on the situation. Like he'd been expecting the swordsman to blame all their problems on him and now he had no clue how to react. Zoro himself didn't know what he should do. Give the cook some space? Ask for a response? Repeat himself once more? He wasn't sure. Their savior came in the form of a little blond boy walking up the hill and plonking himself in his father's lap as he panted with a big grin on his face.

The beaming smile from the child shook both of them from their thoughts as Sanji set about asking his son how his playtime went and retrieving a bottle of water for the kid to chug down. A brief wave at the on looking Gin was given as thanks and the brothers waved back before returning to their mat to pack it up.

Leo chattered happily about the great kicks he had made and how Gin told him he should be a soccer star when he grew up. The lighthearted rambling stole the attention of both adults and soon Sanji had decided packing up was necessary if he were to get Leo home before the kid decided to crash from all the excitement.

They parted ways cordially with smiles on their faces but as Zoro walked home he felt disappointment grow within himself. He was happy he had managed to apologise to Sanji, but the lack of a response tugged at his heart. His brain tried to reason that Sanji needed time to process the information but he couldn't help but feel that he'd fucked up somehow.

* * *

The sky was just starting to get lighter when the plane touched down. Half an hour later, the sun was barely peeking over the horizon as a tall man stood outside Haneda Airport having a joint as he waited for his cab. Messy black hair was whipped by the breeze as his dark ringed eyes stared solemnly ahead.

So far, Japan wasn't too different from any other country he'd visited, but airports usually worked that way…being international ports and all. Finishing the cigarette, a certain blond's favourite brand no less, he crushed the butt beneath his shoe just in time for a cab to pull up alongside him.

The taximan opened the automatic door and then exited ready to take his new patron's bags unable to hide his flinch when he saw the extensive tattoos all over his client's hands and wrists only to be hidden by long sleeves. The man looked foreign, so definitely not yakuza, but perhaps he was a criminal from his own country? A startled glance at the rider's face earned him an unamused glare and he quickly got to work loading the bags before scurrying back behind the wheel. Surely, with this type of client it was best to just sit in silence and ask no questions. He hoped the police wouldn't think of him as an accomplice or anything. The man slid gracefully into the back seat and immediately pulled out his phone.

A beat of silence passed before the taximan worked up the courage to ask for their destination.

"Ano…honoured customer…" piercing eyes locked onto his via the mirror and another shiver chilled his spine. "Where would you like to go, sir?"

The dark-haired man shuffled in his seat and for a moment the taximan was worried about a possible language barrier, then he settled back reclining as is he owned the damn car and spoke in fluent Japanese.

"The Baratie. Shibuya, go chome."

* * *

Uploaded 31st August 2018

Well, here it is.

Sorry for the super late update...and the fact that there was no July update. I went back to Australia during the Japanese summer holidays and just spent time with family and friends and doing all the things I missed in Australia. AKA - COFFEE SHOPS ( ◞･౪･) This chapter's the longest I've written so far and that's why I've taken so long to upload. I really wanted to make sure it was right and even now I'm a little worried I may have missed something...so please let me know if you see any inconsistencies.

Thank you all again for your patience for this chapter and your kind words!

Subaru's dreams: Thank you for always reviewing! I appreciate that you take the time to write one it means a lot. Yeah, Nami can be pretty shitty but I did want to show why she's still, you know, in the group. People are like that in real life too :) As for the Ace V Zoro time with Sanji...sorry but I will be playing with it for a long while yet...and adding new people to the mix too ヽ(。ゝω・)ノ Hope you liked this chapter!

yukino76: Thanks for the review! Yeah, I wanted to show a little more of the serious side to him! He can be pretty amazing!

Raigon: Nice having you back. You say the nicest things! Thank you. Yeah, things are pretty deep here...which is why chapters are beginning to take be a long time since I don't want to give TOO much away while I set up the plot so it's not like 'Where the hell did that come from?' kind of thing. As for your questions...I hope you'll stick around to find out.

Guest #1: Thanks for the review （ゝ。∂）Nami and Luffy's relationship will be a tease throughout this piece...Ace is sure on team LuNa ヽ(。ゝω・)ノ

Althayr: Good to have you here! Thanks for the review. Thank you for your kind words, I felt super flattered reading them!

Purplepulu: Hi! Thanks for reviewing. ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ Your words were so kind! I'm glad you like the Zeff-Sanji interactions...they're some of my favourite things to write. I just love that kind of gruff but caring thing the two of them do!

Guest #2: Thank you! I really love that about them too! My fav kind of ZoSan fics are where Zoro is absolutely smitten with Sanji! He's just that kind of guy to put 100% of himself into his relationship for his partner so I like making that his biggest regret in this fic. I hope you do too!

Curlybrow: Curlybrow...just...˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚. thank you so much. You made me so emotional! Thanks for your kind words. I really hope you enjoyed this chapter and sorry for the long wait!


	9. Chapter Nine

CHAPTER NINE

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

The eggplant was brooding again. He'd be annoyed with the broccoli but he realised that at long last, these confrontations were making his boy finally face the situation he'd escaped from and although it was painful to watch his usually spirited son lumber around the house in a daze, it was a necessary stop on the way to his future happiness. The four years Sanji was in France he could reason away his feelings. Without Zoro there to actually contradict his self-deprecating thoughts the boy had grown into the mindset that _he_ had been the one to fuck up their relationship. Oh, he never said it outright, but when they spoke on the phone Zeff noticed the way he phrased his sentences. When he had brought up the stupid ball of muscles, Sanji's tone had changed and he always put on a more chipper voice as if to convince Zeff that he was fine. They never got too personal with talk of _relationships -_ the eggplant had other things to think about at the time - but Zeff had seen the changes that had occurred in Sanji years before. Sanji had always been a straightforward kind of man – Zeff would have been surprised otherwise. His kind of nurturing was _not_ the babying kind. He felt he owed the kid the respect to teach him how the world actually worked. Being wrapped in cotton wool would do nothing but cause misconceptions and trouble in the future.

Sanji already had an attitude on him. Found by Zeff wandering the port city of _Brest_ at four years old. The kid had been bloody uncooperative as he tried to take him to the gendarme to reunite him with his family. The poor kid, practically skin and bones, looked absurdly small to the point where Zeff had mistaken the four-year-old for a kid around two years of age. After a lot of fussing, and feeding the kid's grumbling empty stomach he finally managed to get him down to the station. He thought it'd be a quick 'here's a missing kid, find their parents' and he'd be off but after taking down all his contact information including the vessel he had moored at the Harbour, the kid woke up screaming. All the officers tried to calm him down but when the kid caught sight of the grumpy old man he ran to his side refusing to let go. He had been rather disobliging, refusing to speak unless Zeff was in the room to the point where the gendarme suspected him of actually being related to the kid but wanting to be rid of him. Needless to say, the fuss Zeff had kicked up over such a horrid accusation would forever be ingrained in the minds of those present. In any case, he did submit to a DNA test, which –as he expected– came back negative a few days later. He had had other business that he needed to tend to in _Le Havre_ but the gendarme had requested he stay until the test results came back. To his surprise, for some strange reason he couldn't bring himself to leave the tyke. During the whole ordeal, he visited the child who had been placed in the custody of the local orphanage each day. There had been no lead as to his family. No missing reports had been filed. It was beginning to look like a case of neglect and abuse. All the kid had managed to say was that his name was Sanji and he was four years old. He constantly asked when would Reiju-nee-san come for him. He did cry for his mother and sister at night, and when asked about his father he just said that his papa was scary.

However, with the constant questioning Sanji soon started to leave out the fact he had a father. At one point when they asked him once more to describe his papa, he said that Zeff was his papa. They asked about is mother and sister and he barely could recall having either. It was perhaps unfair of Zeff to blame the gendarme for this alone. The child psychologist on hand at the time suggested that Sanji had probably been abused so this was the natural response of one so young –to cut out the bad memories and replace them with happier new ones. He had no idea of the validation of those claims, but it was obvious when one looked at the recorded transcripts of Sanji's conversations with the authorities that the more and more they tried to pry information from him, the less and less he seemed able to give or remember.

It had been about two weeks after he initially found the kid that he was told he could leave the port provided he made himself available should new information come to light regarding the situation. Upon his departure, the psychologist at the time expressed her sadness that he had to leave. Sanji had become obviously dependent on his presence and she had always focused more on his healing than finding the perpetrators of his neglect. It had been perhaps unprofessional of her to mention his noticeable bond with the old seafarer but Zeff could see her concern for the young blond just becoming another statistic of abuse, just another number in an orphanage. He'd seen her trail of thought but gently rejected the idea. His ship was no place to raise a kid, let alone one that was not his own flesh and blood. He had sailed off to _Le Havre_ and had spent a week and a half worrying about the tiny snotty nosed kid. Nights were spent waiting for a call or notice from the gendarme that they needed him back, or at least from that psychologist lady to update him or request his return.

Finally, unable to continue dithering about the situation, he'd sailed once more to _Brest_ intending to visit the tyke with the mindset that if he was doing fine, he'd wipe the child from his mind once and for all. The sight that had greeted him when he entered the orphanage was heart shattering. According to the director, Sanji had become a recluse. He responded to no one, interacted only when forced and seemed not to cry, but sit on his bed with tears held in his eyes. All the adults had expected a teary reunion when Zeff entered the room. What they were given was the cold shoulder. The same defensive attitude the four-year-old had projected the night they first met came back in full force. The director and psychologist seemed shocked by this reaction but all Zeff saw was a kid that was trying to deal with being left behind _again._

He sat on the bed next to the kid. At first Sanji chose to ignore him, then the punches came. He waved away the mortified orphanage director with a hand as he spoke.

"Does it feel better, eggplant?" The words slipped out and the child stilled. A pregnant pause hung in the air before it was broken with the heart-shattering sobs of the tiny boy as he clung to the old seaman apologies cascading from his lips.

Once the tears subsided, and Sanji had fallen into a slumber, Zeff removed himself from the kid and had a meeting with the director and psychologist. The process of adoption had been expedited; many glad that the young boy would have some semblance of a family life after all he'd gone through. The discussions about his alternative lifestyle as a seaman raised some questions but the obvious bond that the pair had shared set most of the queries to rest. He visited the kid daily, waiting anxiously to see if the boy would seemingly change his mind yet stubbornly, the kid refused to interact with anyone unless prodded to by Zeff.

And that was how their relationship began.

Throughout the years, Zeff saw how Sanji seemed to close himself off from people. Unfortunately, the few times he'd tried to open up his heart he'd been badly burnt. The kid had taken it as a sign to never let himself be close with anyone and Zeff was far too much a private man in regards to feelings to be able to convince him otherwise. It was perhaps his old age upbringing, but the old chef had always consoled himself with the fact that Sanji would open up to the right person. He was still young, he had plenty of time left to find a suitable partner...although, there were nights where he sat up with his favourite wine contemplating whether his own closed-mindedness had somehow affected his charge.

Then the broccoli had come along.

From the moment Sanji first started complaining about some green-headed algae beast Zeff's interest had been piqued. It was quite rare of Sanji to complain in the kitchen about strangers. The staff? No problem. Health inspectors? All the time. Other chefs? Everyday. But a kid at his university that he'd only just met? That was new. Surreptitiously, he prodded Sanji into revealing more and more about this so called 'marimo' and probably before the kid himself realised, knew that Sanji was smitten by this green-headed beefcake.

It became even more obvious when the moss head started showing up at the Baratie's back door to catch the eggplant on his smoke break. All the chefs in the kitchen were wide eyed when instead of cursing the mother fucker out, Sanji began to chat alongside the grinning idiot. Suffice it to say, his complaints about the green haired youth were completely redundant ever since, however, Zeff had instructed his staff to keep their own suppositions about the broccoli and eggplant's relationship to themselves if they valued their job. It was interesting seeing how the persistent kid could affect Sanji so. The blond was usually unshakable - or so he pretended to be. It was refreshing to see his cold shell be shaken up as he dealt with the feelings of being flattered by the attention as well as interested in the broccoli's intentions. It was a long game of cat and mouse and part of the seafarer wanted to just snap at the eggplant to finally wake up and accept the fact that the broccoli was completely one hundred percent smitten with him. All the same, he knew that he had to let things run their course naturally. Sanji -although at loathe to admit it- was a person who needed security. It was something his past was lacking and therefore something he valued highly. Stepping into a new relationship left himself open to all manners of attacks that if he were truthful with himself, left him terrified. So Zeff had resolved not to get involved. That didn't mean, however, that he was blind to the changes that came over his beloved son at the instigation of Zoro.

Just like in the past, Zoro's presence and persistence now, was shaking Sanji up. Occasionally the old chef worried that it might be too much for the poor kid, but he also saw that Sanji had let himself live in a hollow state for four years now. Of course, Leo brought much light and good memories but he could see that there was some part of him that was holding back, as if he couldn't freely enjoy himself. Not fully. Not yet.

So it was, that Zeff turned back to his newspaper trying not to comment on the sad sag of Sanji's shoulders as he hoped mentally that Zoro would grow a backbone and straighten things out soon.

By the end of the night that patience was nearing its end. Though the eggplant managed to pull on a smile for Leo's sake, Zeff knew better and the more he saw the tight lines around his kid's eyes the more irritated he became. His frown deepened as he sat in his arm chair the newspaper in front of his eyes a fragile ploy at seeming busy when in reality his eyes trailed after Sanji and Leo. The pair were packing up now, blocks and figurines were being thrown haphazardly into the toy box. Where Leo's eyes were droopy with tiredness, Sanji's were tight with tension. Obviously something had come up after he'd left the park. Judging by Sanji's pensive looks throughout the night, it seemed that the broccoli had given something for the young chef to think about and the stupid kid was doing his best to _not_ think. It couldn't be healthy to ignore your problems like that.

Zeff was about to offer putting Leo to bed himself when he noticed a warm genuine smile settle across the eggplant's face as he scooped up his tired son. Begrudgingly Zeff decided to let Sanji have his moment with his kid and once again went back to _reading_ the newspaper just in time to pretend being interrupted so Leo could give him a kiss goodnight. He softly wished his grandson a goodnight with a kiss of his own and once again caught that soft look on Sanji's. It was fucking heartwarming.

He and Sanji were alike in so many ways, and different in many more. One thing they both struggled with was properly expressing their emotions. Perhaps it was the vulnerability that came with admitting such things as _feelings_ out loud; the thought made even himself feel uncomfortable. With Sanji though, that was a whole other challenge. It was clear how the feeling of abandonment had eaten away at the kid, so much so that he was now terrified to try trusting once again. Still, tonight he would knock some sense into the stringbean. Enough with the moping. He was going to get the kid to spill what had happened and get him to start facing himself once again.

Stretching his legs, he winced as the prosthetic caused the sock to rub against his skin. Standing he made his way to the kitchen. If he was going to confront the eggplant, he needed to be prepared and that meant booze for the flighty kid.

Sanji never liked talking about his problems. It was something that Zeff only caught onto four years into their time together. He'd noticed the blond coming home with bruises, then scratches and the one time with the split lip. For every injury there'd been an excuse but overall, Zeff had seen the bigger picture. He had gone and confronted the school about his concerns and after promising to keep a better eye out, a little later that week he'd been on the receiving end of a phone call for a parent teacher meeting. When he had arrived, the little eight year old had been sitting sullenly on on of the armchairs in the principal's office. On seeing Zeff, his face had paled and his eyes watered but he held in his tears. But it was the expression on his little face that Zeff remembered the most. A look of despair and self-hatred. The old chef was completely confused by it until the story had come out. Sanji had been getting bullied at school and it was only thanks to Zeff's call that the teachers had kept a better eye out on him during the week. During lunch, the teacher on duty noticed he wasn't around and after a little searching they found him in the middle of a lynching. Needless to say the troublemakers were dealt with, but Sanji seemed anything but relieved. It was there that Zeff had learnt amongst sobbing tears and the principal's judging gaze that Sanji had kept all the torment a secret because he hadn't wanted to burden Zeff with more problems.

That had thrown Zeff for a loop. What had he been doing to make the kid think he was a problem? His first instinct had been to yell, to get offended but all he did was open his arms and accept the crying snotball of a kid that was so desperately scared of being expendable.

Zeff scrounged through the liquor cabinet looking for his favourite whiskey. That wasn't the only time the kid had needed a reminder that he was loved. Several more times throughout their lives Sanji had fallen into similar slumps. He was too quick to think himself as useless. He thrived on being a provider for others, but what Zeff wasn't sure about was if the eggplant knew that what he really needed was someone to show they would provide for him.

Zoro had been that person.

And then he was not.

It was the fault of dumb kid mistakes. They had both been twenty. Barely adults though they thought they knew themselves and the world. But that wasn't true. It wasn't anyone's fault. It was just...sad.

Reaching up he was pulling down two shot glasses when his son's tired voice called out from behind him.

"Is one of those for me?" The fatigued yet still cheeky voice purred. Zeff let a smirk unfurl on his face knowing the brat couldn't see it.

"No." He started sarcastically. "I decided I wanted to use two glasses...one for each hand." He jibed.

Sanji simply let his eyes roll as he sat at the small table. The clunk of the bottle on the table drew his gaze and he watched tiredly as Zeff uncapped the bottle and liberally poured two shots. Sanji's eyebrows raised with satisfaction seeing the generous portion. Sliding one glass to his son, Zeff raised his own.

"To Leo and a happy life." He murmured quietly.

A proud smile fluttered across his son's lips before he repeated the sentiment as they clinked glasses. They took a moment to enjoy the burn of the alcohol. Small chat first. Talk of the restaurant and food delivery dates. A cigarette lit. Another glass poured. Leo's school and tuition fees. Which school would be best to enroll him in soon...another glass. The night ticked on and Zeff decided it was time to get down to the real business.

"So, eggplant." He began twirling the glass in his meaty hands. "What happened with the broccoli?"

The question obviously took the sous chef by surprise but Zeff waited, ready for anything.

"What? Nothing happened." The kid started coolly. Unfortunately for him, Zeff had watched all his elusive tactics form in his teen years. He wasn't buying any of it.

"Bullshit." Zeff muttered and Sanji cast him a pinched glare obviously about to defend his stupidly weak lie. "You don't get high strung over nothing, eggplant. What happened?"

As if taking an out Sanji was quick to reply. "I'm not high strun-"

"Don't even try and finish that lie, brat. I've known you for years now. Still think you can pull one on me? You have a choice to make. Keep pretending that everything's fine and dandy and bury yourself in more misery or own up to what's going on and move past it. The choice is yours. But you know you can't go on forever and now it's not just you if you decide to have a breakdown. Leo's got to deal with it too."

It was low to bring up his insecurities but Sanji always found it hard to be honest from the start. As if his rant was cut off by Zeff's words, Sanji sat silently. After what seemed like an eternity of silence Sanji finally spoke.

"What do you want me to say?" His tone was defeated. It wasn't something Zeff liked hearing from his son.

"The truth. What happened that has you on edge?"

Another minute of silence passed. Smoke puffed out from Sanji's cigarette as if he were a steam train.

"He said he was sorry." The small voice quivered as if he were not supposed to say the words aloud. Zeff waited, ready for the blond to add more and when nothing came he spoke.

"That's a good start. What was he sorry for?"

Sanji squirmed in his seat a little. All this 'feelings and talking' bullshit made him feel awkward but as he chanced a glance through his fringe to the only father figure he remembered in his life he felt relieved. All that he saw was complete and utter attention. No judgement. No smirk. No grimace. Undivided attention and concern. He must have been really bad at hiding how these things were affecting him to make Zeff look like that. Placing his bets on not being made a fool, he decided to confide in his mentor.

"He said…" Sanji took a breath. It was easier _thinking_ about saying these things. But actually saying them felt weird. For one, he didn't agree with them, but then he also felt extremely relieved that Zoro did...what did that mean? Realising Zeff was waiting for an answer he started once more. "He said that he was sorry he wasn't there for me...he said…" Another breath. "He was putting himself above us...that it was his fault...but he was wrong, it was becau-"

"Because what, eggplant?" Zeff sighed as he cut in with exasperation. "Because it was somehow all _your_ fault?" The sarcasm dripping from the words were obvious and Sanji was taken aback. Usually Zeff took any chance he could to take him down a peg or two. The way Zeff spat those words screamed how untrue he thought they were. Sanji shifted in his seat uncomfortably being sure to hide most of his face with his hair as he usually did. He was aware of just how stupidly expressive his face was and had no intentions of letting Zeff see him fall apart so easily. The silence stretched for a long while before Zeff spoke once more.

"So, eggplant, what did you say to that?"

"I…" Sanji took in a breath and sighed. "I didn't say anything." Another long pause though this time Sanji felt the compelling aura from the old chef demanding him to explain. "He's got it all so fucking wrong. I mean after four years I kind of understand, but he thinks it was his-"

He was interrupted as Zeff spat out a soft curse and slammed his glass down shocking the blond so much that he looked up out of reflex.

"Let me say this once more, you stupid eggplant. None of that was your fault. I've been saying it for years. Zoro's been _feeling_ it for years. Only you think _you_ deserve to carry this cross alone and I'm sick of watching you kill yourself over it!"

All Sanji could do was sit wide-eyed and take in his father's words. He knew them. He had _always_ known that Zeff felt his decision to leave...the break up...everything was not some fault of his but the utter conviction Zeff had just now shocked the young man to his core. Unbidden, tears started spilling from his eyes and his body began begging for oxygen in heaving breaths. He had always blamed himself for every failed relationship. He didn't know when it started, but it felt like he had always carried around this guilt like a blanket wrapped around him that stopped him from communicating properly...that made him somehow inadequate.

Warm arms maneuvered him to face a broad chest and he realised his father had skirted the table to gather him up in a hug. It was humiliating and yet, so comforting that he couldn't pull away. He felt like he had not acted this way since seven years old when he decided not to bother Zeff with his stupid problems. Perhaps he had been mistaken all those years. Zeff's strong hand gently clasped the back of his head. Not patting or soothing, just reassuring that he was there, that he was a support Sanji could lean on.

When he was calming down, Zeff pulled away slightly, the hand on the back of his neck remained, gently asking Sanji to look him in the eyes.

"It's good he got the chance to apologise. He's been asking about you all these years."

In his current messed up state he was sure his eyes betrayed his surprise if Zeff's current indulgent smile was anything to go by. "He's been waiting a long time for you, eggplant."

Fresh hot tears spilled from his eyes, as he took in a shuddering breath. There was so much he felt. So much that he wanted to say; the feeling of being overwhelmed rising in his body.

"Take it slow, eggplant." Zeff cajoled softly. Nodding while taking in shuddering breaths the blond chef swiped at his eyes clearing away the tears. While he had his face buried in his hands he felt the courage to ask the one question that had plagued him for all four years. A question he could never bring himself to ask.

"He...he was asking about me?" He questioned his voice barely a whisper as if he couldn't believe he had actually uttered it.

A soft grin broke out on the old seafarer's face. "Every fucking time the broccoli came to the Baratie." He affirmed.

Not knowing why, Sanji let out a soft chuckle. It wasn't really funny or anything. He wasn't sure why he did. Perhaps it was relief or the shock of the conversation beginning to wear him down but one thing he was sure of was that there was a small glowing feeling stirring in his chest that felt something like happiness.

His name being called by the old chef brought him from his thoughts and he raised his head once more to lock eyes with the man. "You need to think about what you want, Sanji." Zeff started his old grey eyes boring into his own. " _Really_ think about what you want." He let the sentence hang and Sanji sniffled and nodded in acknowledgement.

"You've been resting on your laurels too long. Think about what it is you truly want and when you're ready, tell the broccoli. He deserves that much at least." Closing his eyes as a few straggler tears escaped it was all Sanji could do to nod once more and let his face fall into Zeff's comforting chest as the old man soothing stroked his back.

* * *

It wasn't Luffy's fault. How was he to know what had transpired the day before in the park especially since Zoro wasn't telling anyone out of fear he'd already fucked it all up. But honestly, the second time being coerced to the Baratie for food? It was beginning to feel obvious even to the swordsman how much the young brunette was trying in his own way to play matchmaker. How many times could Zoro show up at the elite restaurant with the excuse 'Luffy dragged me along' before Zeff started up all those comments about not having enough balls to come on his own or being so weak minded as to follow his friends all the time. He felt the oncoming's of a migraine just thinking about it. Even so, he couldn't scold his friend. It was largely due to the fact that Luffy would be there that he felt he _could_ show up at the Baratie so maybe there was some truth to those thoughts. Either way, Luffy's presence gave him the courage to show...even if it was so damn early.

The restaurant did exceptionally well. It was always busy and reservations were continuously being booked dinner was always their main affair but lunch had a lot of customers too. What many people didn't realise was that the breakfast options at the Baratie were to die for as well. He remembered Sanji complaining to him during their university years his utter shock at the fact that so little places opened early for breakfast in Japan. Most of the famous coffee chains, though American in their origins, only opened from nine thirty or even _ten_. It had taken the Baratie a while to pick up a regular flow of morning customers but word had gotten around and it paid off. The Baratie was one of the most famous all-day eateries in Shibuya. The fact that they opened early enough for the rush of morning office workers to come in, grab an excellent barista made coffee and some freshly baked pastries earned them many awards from several magazines and even a mention in a column of must visit places in Shibuya. The fact that Sanji, Zeff and two of their other workers had all entered and ranked in several coffee making competitions didn't harm them either. Even Zoro could see it was something that old Zeff was proud of. The restaurant had different vibes throughout the day, however that undertone of class and expertise was felt no matter the time of day.

In any case, he hadn't been expecting Luffy to swing by so early. When he'd mentioned on the phone yesterday that he intended to take Zoro to the famed restaurant, the swordsman assumed he'd meant for lunch or something of the like. Luffy generally loved to eat meat and although the Baratie's breakfast menu held a range of dishes for all tastes, one generally didn't order a steak for breakfast. Regardless, here they were, walking through the doors at opening time. Six fucking am in the morning. Zoro rubbed his eyes as he followed Luffy through to the barstools by the barista machine where one long-legged blond was already working the machine with expertise.

"Sanji!" The monkey-man beamed. The cook raised his head in surprise and flicked his eyes to the both of them before finally finding his words.

"What the hell are you two doing here at the arsecrack of dawn?" Genuine surprise showing. Zoro slumped on the chair next to the excited brunette before he sleepily rested his head in his hands.

"Stupid Captain decided he wanted Baratie breakfast." He said finishing with a yawn.

" I can't believe he managed to get you here so early! I distinctly remember you turning into a ball of moss if I so much as _tried_ to get you up before 6AM…" As soon as the words left his mouth a silence fell among the group. After so much pussyfooting around the situation, it was the first time one of the parties in question had so candidly referred to their past relationship.

Sanji busied himself with fixing the coffee using it as an excuse not to look either of the young men in the eye. He tried to remain unperturbed, indifferent to what he had unconsciously uttered but that was hard to do when he'd heard Zoro's breath hitch and seen those muscular shoulders become more rigid than usual not to mention their unfinished conversation from the other day looming over them. It seemed an age away, but it was only in fact seconds that passed before, as per the norm, they were saved from their awkwardness by their energetic leader.

"Zoro's always had a hard time getting up unless it was to fill his stomach." The lighthearted teasing broke the growing tension and Sanji leapt at the change of pace.

"People in glass houses, Luffy!" He admonished softly as he set the coffee before the pair. "I don't recall you being too good at getting up early either unless a leg of meat was dangled under your nose!"

"But Saaaaaaaaaaannnjjiiiiiiiiiiiiii," Luffy whined "Your cooking is too good! I always want to eat it!"

"Well you guys sit on that while I go prepare some grub, ok? Yell if anyone comes in for a coffee." He said placing a small plate of homemade onigiri in front of them. At Zoro's confused face he explained. "I usually snack on them in the back if I have a spare minute between customers...but if you're going to eat a hole through the counter, I'd rather you have them." There was no question that it was Luffy he was referring to but the fact that the onigiri was offered to the both of them made Zoro's heart melt.

They were his favourite.

Sanji knew. Sanji always knew. The special meaning Sanji's onigiri had for him perhaps was lost to time for the blond, but Zoro would always remember the first time the chef had made them for him. When he had been expressing his sadness about missing Kuina, how he and Koshiro had been hopeless around the house and it had been Kuina who had stepped in and filled their mother's shoes and looked after the both of them...and how when she had died...too early for her time, Zoro had realised how much he missed the little things she used to do for him...like making his favourite onigiri.

Zoro caught on to Sanji's light blush and Luffy began digging into the onigiri needing no further convincing. Sanji used the moment to give brief smile before escaping into the back to start on the food. In the back room Sanji let out the panicked sigh he'd managed so far to suppress. Luckily he was on his own for now with Carne having called in talking about traffic and running about fifteen minutes. Leaning over the sink out of eyesight Sanji took deep breaths to take the edge off his panic. Since his talk with Zeff last night he'd done some thinking though he was still in no place to actually make a decision about what to do...one thing he had come to terms with was the fact that there definitely was some part of him that loved Zoro and would always love him. What he still wasn't sure about was how that would factor in with the rest of his crazy ass life. Sure, it was easy to admit to himself that he loved Zoro...that didn't mean they were compatible no matter what Zeff or the swordsman thought. Zeff was adamant that his fucked up family life was no reason to not find love, but Sanji begged to differ. Although…

Peeking out into the main dining room, Sanji couldn't help the soft smile from settling over his face as he watched Zoro chat happily with Luffy. That handsome grin had always been one of Sanji's pleasures. Zoro looked so youthful when he smiled and Sanji often found that that rugged smirk was contagious. Shaking himself from his thoughts he got started on two big breakfast specials for the two of them.

Not long after Carne had bowled into the room cursing and spitting about the stupid traffic in Shibuya. Sanji took the mantle of his job seriously and cussed the slacker off loudly for being late much t Luffy and Zoro's amusement. Of course the only response he got was being flipped off before the two of them settled into a good rhythm for prep. He was just setting down the two loaded breakfast specials when the first of many business clad workers sauntered in for their daily cup of joe. He was kept rather busy filling coffee orders and running into the back to help dish up grub for some of the other morning stragglers that could afford a few minutes sit down for breakfast.

Luffy was on his second round of breakfast while Zoro was slowly sipping at a beautifully made espresso when Sanji finally had the chance to take somewhat of a break from the rush.

"So, how's the croque madame, Luffy?" Sanji asked knowing full well it was the most perfect croque madame to have ever been made.

"Ish sho guuuhd!" Luffy enthused with a completely full mouth causing both Sanji and the swordsman to make a face at his utterly poor manners or lack thereof.

"Ugh, swallow first, idiot." Sanji muttered swatting the brunette with a dishtowel in disgust. Zoro snickered as their captain whined at being hit. The blond turned his eyes to the green haired man, raising an eyebrow.

"So, any complaints?" He sassed.

It was probably subconscious, but Zoro couldn't help but catch how the cook had phrased the question to himself compared to Luffy's as if he was already expecting some sort of negative answer from him. It was perhaps nothing, but seeing the way Sanji looked at him in disbelief yesterday when he blamed himself for their break up, Zoro felt there was perhaps something a lot deeper in their relationship that made Sanji doubt himself so much. Whatever the case, he wanted no part in making Sanji feel inferior. He had always admired Sanji's strength and wit and f course his cooking skills. The last thing he wanted to do was contribute to any negative feelings the blond had.

"Of course, I have none." He said instead with a small smile. "It was fucking perfect as always."

Apparently the cook was not ready for such a blunt compliment and Zoro relished in the feeling of being the one to make that slight dusting of pink on his pale face come to life.

"Shi shi shi." Luffy chimed. "Sanji's cooking has always been the best, that's what you always said, na, Zoro?"

Suddenly it was his own turn to blush. Even though he had decided to be honest he hadn't expected to be thrown into the spotlight like that. Still, his one comfort was that Sanji was now obviously blushing to his roots being on the receiving end of the second hand compliment. Luffy had seemingly caught onto this fact too and began laughing while smiling openly at the blushing cook who embarrassedly swatted at the goofy young man.

Their warm atmosphere was interrupted by the soft jingle of the Baratie doors opening. Sanji took his chance to leave the light teasing to serve the new customer his eyes going comically wide when he recognised who was standing before him.

"Law…" Sanji gasped, practically breathless. Zoro didn't like Sanji's breathy tone uttering another man's name nor the look on his face and turned to glare at the intruder.

The man was tall and thin. Dark hair was covered by an oddly decorated beanie-cap yet a dark overcoat helped give the aura of a man that should not be fucked with. His fingers were littered with tattoos and the man sported a striking goatee with a severe look in his dark grey eyes.

"It's been a while, Sanji." The man spoke and Zoro already hated him for the familiar tone he took and the soft caress of his voice when he uttered the cook's name.

"What are you doing here?" Sanji gasped as he came around the bench tucking away the dish towel to walk up to the gangly man. Zoro itched to grab onto the blond and hold him back but let common sense stop him. However his jealousy ignited once more when the tall dark stranger nonchalantly grabbed onto Sanji's elbows in a pseudo hug and a soft look fell over his face.

"I'm here because I've finally put down my load and I'm ready to be all here for you." He smiled as he leant in to press a kiss to the side of the chef's face.

* * *

Uploaded 3rd December 2018

Um...I'm super sorry about the late upload… I honestly have no excuses for September except a lack of motivation to write and all of October was taken with my older sister and father consecutively coming to stay with me in Japan...It was hard to write when I was doing a whole bunch of activities with them.

Then of course, during my sister's stay my laptop had to start acting up. Currently the w, r, y, u o and enter keys don't work. I've been typing this story up at work using one of my school's computers...but finding the time is hard you know when I'm supposed to be working and all 乁[ᓀ˵▾˵ᓂ]ㄏso it's been a looooooong process. I'm looking into getting my laptop fixed but it's stressful since I bought it in Australia and now am in Japan...so yeah there's that. (一。一;;）

I hope you enjoyed this chapter with the addition of LAW!ヽ(∩。∩゛ヽ) I just HAAAAAAD to. So let me know what you think so far of the situation!

I would love to be able to let you know when I'll next upload, but to be honest it's not looking good for my laptop at the moment. In any case, thank you to all of you who reviewed. It really kept motivating me to keep going (and awkwardly try to write at work) knowing I had all of you waiting for the next chapter. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and hope to post again soon!

Curlybrow: Thank you for the wonderful review! I'm always glad to read how excited and happy my readers are and am especially glad that you're in for the Law x Sanji x Zoro x Ace love square going on here! TBH, the first ever draft of the plot outline for this story was more Zoro x Sanji x Law centric, but then I had to throw Ace into the mix! Thanks for reviewing I hope you like this chapter!

Mio: I'm glad you love Zeff as much as me. One of my favourite fics by New Neon _Fluency_ (I highly recommend reading if you haven't) has a great relationship between Sanji and Zeff and I really love the way it's written. Thanks for the compliments! I too like when it's less about being childish and more about feelings and reality! Yeah, I wasn't sure if I should make it Gin but then was like: 'Well, I'm already adding in all the ships, may as well throw another one in!' (ノ＞▽＜。)ノ

Yukino76: Yeah, it took a while to get them to talk but I wanted to portray a real life kind of relationship where people don't always take the opportunities they have to talk out of fear of 'making things weird' or whatever. Thanks for hanging around and reviewing!

Sparklespepper: Thanks for waiting for these chapters. I really appreciate it. I hope you enjoyed this one too!

Purplepulu: Welcome back again! Thanks for reviewing! I understand the feeling, ZoSan is meant to be! Gin was always a super interesting character to me, the fight between his morals and the duty he felt to his Captain was actually really well written in the manga. I love when people write him into their fics with all his complexities!

Lady Elocin: I'm so happy to hear that you love the family setting as much as I do, they're honestly just too adorable to do anything otherwise! Thank you for your kind words! I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Guest 1: Thanks for your review but I respectfully disagree. Leo's words are based off my friend's daughter who is just turning three as well as siblings of children I have taught. I feel you may have a point for some of Leo's longer lines, but having worked with young children I feel that this is the level a soon to be four-year-old who has an interactive parental figure would have. I realise your experience with young children may be different, but kids normally can articulate pretty well by the age of 3-5. I guess it depends on the child though, so I understand if this seems strange to you. In any case, thank you for your criticism. I will be screening Leo's lines even more thoroughly now.

Guest 2: I'm very sorry for the mistake. I honestly don't know much about Brazil and should have researched more. I apologise for offending you. Thank you for correcting this mistake.

Guest 3: I'm sorry you feel this way. I live in Japan and have studied Japanese but at your words I checked again with one of my Japanese colleagues. I don't know where you got the idea that it is offensive. Calling family friends 'oji-san' is not at all offensive according to my colleague. In fact, it signifies a close relationship. I can understand if the way I wrote it made it sound like Leo goes up to random strangers calling them oji-san but that is not the case. At any rate, thank you for reviewing.

Subaru's dreams: Not as late as I am though! Gomen! I'm happy to oblige! ZoSan time is super sweet! Heh heh...yeah….more time for Law and get ready for some Ace time too...what can I say… I love the love triangles...squares...etc. I'm so happy to hear that about Zoro. I am trying to keep him as the 'strong silent type' but also the frank 'I say what I mean' man...I hope I'm doing a good job!

monsterpippi: Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you like it!


	10. Chapter Ten

CHAPTER TEN

By Aoi Koneko Chan

* * *

" _Did his flight arrive_?"

A bitter scoff was his answer as his brother flung golden bangs from his face and slumped into the opposite armchair.

" _Yeah, he sent a text, two words, the mother fucker…'_ I'm here _.' That's all_."

The elder ignored the muttered _shithead_ and nodded sagely.

" _We can only hope Judge hasn't heard of this yet._ "

" _How could he possible know?"_ His youngest brother piped in. Another disdainful snort courtesy of their middle brother filled the air. He chose to ignore that and answer the question from the youngest but he did allow himself a reproachful look to the second son.

" _That man has many methods and I_ did _warn Law that he was probably a target and that a trip to Japan would warrant some investigation but he insists all will be fine."_

" _Stupid motherfucker…"_ Came the mumbled curse from the second armchair where a certain petulant brother was pouting.

The eldest allowed himself a smirk. " _Indeed…well, we shall see how things play out for now."_

* * *

Law would be lying if he said the sight of a familiar blush on the blond chef's face didn't spark a flame of pride in him. Sanji, aside from being the most attractive man on Earth, had an extremely attractive quality of unintentional sexiness and Law loved the feeling of making the usually ignorant man aware of the fact that he was beyond attractive. The chef hardly ever realized the effect he had on others, and in the rare times he did notice, he became self-conscious, worrying that the attention was entirely for shallow reasons. He wasn't wrong for some of his pursuers, but he was also discounting how popular his considerate personality was. It was strikingly attractive how he listened to people and gave them his full attention. It made them feel important and loved and in turn, of course, the attraction to that feeling made people go after him. Perhaps not the most genuine of all reasons, but it was something he had noticed about the blond during their time together in France.

He let his hand reach up and graze a soft cheek, brushing back some hair as he gently clasped a hand behind the blond's neck. The familiar act pinged a certain sense of longing. He had missed the casual touches, the soft looks. They were things he had almost forgotten and yet they came back so familiarly upon merely seeing his lovely chef.

Their time together in Paris had been brief, just past half a year, but in his time in Barcelona, he'd thought of the blond he'd left behind more often than he'd care to admit. He'd never expected to find himself with a consistent lover, let alone one with a child. Leo and Sanji were such bright sparks in his life he found himself inexplicably drawn to them and eventually just let his restraint go to indulge in the human contact he seemed to have been missing. The two of them hadn't had anything nearly in the realms of 'exclusivity' both not wishing to label what they had; however, it was obvious for all involved that they hadn't been flirting around since they first hooked up. It was a shame it had to be put on hold when it had.

Getting close to the answers he was searching for and with things in Barcelona finally settling down, he couldn't help but give in to the aching need to reunite with his past lover, a man who had suited him in all aspects excepting in how clean his hands were. Screw the labels and their shared trait of not talking about emotions. He had decided he wanted Sanji in his life. It wasn't going to be easy; he was fully aware of how Sanji belittled himself and was actively his _own_ enemy for finding happiness. Law also knew his lifestyle came with many hardships that at one point in time he had loathed to ask of Sanji to suffer through, but after nearly a year of being separated, he had decided he had to try. Sanji had left the dark, but Law was very much still enveloped in it. His ties to the sinister realm of their past would always be a point of concern for the chef but he knew they could work through things. He missed Sanji's wit and sarcasm. He missed how he could flip from casual to sexy and back again all within the span of minutes. He missed the amazing gourmet lifestyle Sanji provided for anyone of importance in his life, in cooking and in love. Truly, Sanji's indulgences knew no bounds in emotional availability and also the bedroom…but most of all, Law missed his confidant; his advisor, his match as a lover and as a friend.

He and Sanji both shared fucked up childhoods and it was perhaps his own experiences that allowed him to see how Sanji stood in the way of his own happiness as if he were a man who didn't deserve any because…he had been there too. He had been that man that had been too closed off, aloof, trying to live as a lone wolf while unconsciously leaning in to any sense of human warmth and empathy. Meeting Sanji had been a glass shattering moment for him. It was as if the foggy film that distorted his vision cracked and fell away to show for once a clear image.

Sanji.

Sanji had pulled him from the depths of his loneliness when he hadn't even known he was lonely. It was a humiliating thought at first, admitting to the idea of loneliness sounded so…pathetic, and yet, Sanji's bright warmth flooded through his doubts and beckoned him to reach out.

The familiar smoothness of soft skin beneath his palm brought all this and more to his mind and a small, soft smirk to his lips. Beyond Sanji, he could see two men extremely invested in his reunion with the blond. The green hair one of them bore made no secret of who he was.

That was _the ex_. Sanji's ex.

Before he and the chef fell into their ' _relationship_ ' Sanji had confided in him as a friend about the lover he had left back in Japan. On nights when they had drunk slightly more than they should have, Sanji would first go through his happy-drunk phase before settling into his melancholy depression as he thought of his past love. It was no secret between them that Zoro had been a major impactor on Sanji's life. Even when the two had started their romps in the sheets in dirty Parisian hotels it had loomed over their head. Sanji was still in love with the ex that had callously broken his heart. Law was _ok_ with it, it didn't mean he had to like the guy, in fact, he'd always thought Sanji lucky for escaping such a callous guy who couldn't notice the amazing good Sanji had to offer and took it for granted. Yet, Sanji, despite his virtues, or perhaps _because_ of them, still held a special place in his heart for his ex. They had both been fine with it, after all, their relationship had started out as purely physical. A release of needs.

Then things changed.

Feelings got involved.

That added a layer of tension however it did not stop their compatibility. Law, used to being indifferent, didn't find it too hard to act the part, however the deeper they got into their six-month stint, the more frustrated he became. It didn't help that the underground activities he was involved in had started becoming tumultuous at the same time. It forced his attention between two things, Sanji and his work. The fight for which one held his attention set Sanji quietly on edge and his own unspoken issues with Sanji's ex strained things from his end. Eventually they had called the whole _thing_ off, amiably yet still both hurting from the separation. Law had always seen this as more of a _break_ than a _break up_ …he hoped Sanji had felt the same, but hearing from the blond earlier this year that he planned to moved back to Japan set something ablaze in his chest…something very akin to jealousy. He had wanted him to stay in France, but knew things were better for him in Japan with all the current mayhem happening in Europe. Though, after a few months, against certain people's opinions, he decided he had to go and see him. He was sure that Sanji was the partner for him, Law just needed to reorganize his life to accommodate the blond so he could see how serious Law was and finally let go of whatever feelings he still had left for his jackass of an ex and come back to Europe with him.

He had always expected Sanji to stay in France, after all, Leo's whole life had been there, he had _not_ accounted for the chef to move back to Japan to be with his old man. He'd known Sanji had played with the idea for a while, but always seemed to lean negatively into the idea, his own teenage years in the Asian country colouring his idea of putting Leo through the same thing. It was that thought that had made Law accept the length of time he'd have to be away. So, when Sanji had let him know of the impending move during Law's eight-month stint in Barcelona sorting out the trash, he'd been shocked to hear that the blond was going to leave.

It hadn't been pleasant…for him or his men. He'd quickly sent out feelers to find out all they could to make sure the blond chef was safe and not in danger. That's when the news came to him.

Judge had been in France.

Realising that he had been out of the country when one of the many traumas of his love's life had come traipsing around throwing around subtle threats and sending the chef into a panic made his gut churn. The bitter realisation entered his mind as he accepted the fact that he had done exactly what Sanji's motherfucking ex had done.

Chosen work over Sanji.

It was guilt that threw him into his deep research. Guilt that drove him to work long hours find out all he could about the asshole who had caused so much grief for Sanji. The phone calls shared between the two of them before the blond's departure had given him some hope. Sanji didn't blame him and was grateful for all his help in keeping the Russian mafia boss away. Law spoke often with him about protecting the two blonds from Judge and kept him up to date on any information gathered. He had thought that a couple months in Japan with Zeff might be the perfect chance for the chef to relax and unwind whilst also being out of reach of the madman that was his father.

So, he'd happily sent Sanji and Leo off at the airport. In his mind this was another short separation before things could finally settle down. Judge would have to be dealt with again and coerced into leaving the two blonds alone for the rest of their lives and the other mess was looking to be wrapped up soon too. Luckily, there was a fully prepared squad who had vested interest in making sure things panned out that way. So, Law figured he would enjoy what he could with Sanji and Leo in the upcoming weeks, treating this Japan trip as a holiday of sorts to unwind, relax and set about convincing Sanji to come back with him.

Sanji had shuffled him over to a bar stool and Law cared to notice that it was on the _other_ side of the brunette and as far away from _the ex_ as possible without seeming rude and avoidant. He inwardly smirked to himself. Of course, he'd play polite here, but if the brute were to ever see him without an audience and Sanji's protection, some choice words were going to be said.

The loud brunette was a jittery bastard. By all accounts, Sanji had introduced the young man as if he were an adult but his mannerisms told Law otherwise. This was not a man. It was a child in the body of an adult with no filter and no restraint for human boundaries. As a Spaniard, he was used to a 'touchy-feely' culture but it was one thing he abhorred more than anything. This kid was disproving the stereotype of 'the restrained, refined, self-contained Japanese' and Law did not appreciate it. Not one bit.

"So, you're Sanji's friend from France? Cool!" The kid bubbled whilst still shoving food into his ungodly gob.

Law arched one eyebrow. "Well yes, we met in France, but I am from Spain. However, I do often frequent the Parisian cityscape."

"Hey, wow! You speak really good Japanese!" The brunette exclaimed swinging around in his seat. Law flinched to the side to avoid being sprayed by some stray hollandaise sauce from the kid's breakfast. The fucking brat seeing the splatter didn't come out with an apology, he just started laughing loudly finding the whole thing hilarious.

He was two seconds away from decking the disrespectful welp when a strong kick thunked the kid's face directly into the counter.

"God, Luffy! You're such a fucking embarrassment. Watch where you splatter, when you eat, if you can't do that, I won't feed you anymore!"

The little brunette began whining apologies and pleas to keep making food for him and the chef turned to face him, dishcloth in hand wiping up the mess made on the counter.

" _I'm so fucking sorry, Law. Luffy's just too energetic sometimes."_ Law let a small smile rest on his lips hearing his ex-lover speak Spanish to him. Sanji wasn't so confident in the language but he had always tried so as not to burden Law always speaking French to him.

" _It's fine. You're not the one flinging around food in here. And besides, I get all your attention to myself now."_ He ended with a sultry smirk, enjoying the slight startled of wide eyes and the fiery blush settling once more on pale ears before those intense sapphire eyes caught his own with a sly smirk.

" _You're so shameless Law."_ The blond teased playing along like they always had.

"That's not French."

The voice cut through the gentle banter and Law cursed inwardly as the blond startled, remembering where they were and who was present as their audience. He locked that sexy personality behind calm indifference and turned to face the interrupter, namely the rude green-haired brute who'd spoiled the moment.

"Ah, no. It was Spanish."

"Wow, Sanji! You know Spanish too? That's amazing!" The brunette exclaimed gleefully.

"Ah, well, yes. In Europe, people are multilingual and I just…decided to learn, I guess."

Law smirked seeing the muscle head trying to keep the frown off his face while the kid buzzed in his seat with excitement exclaiming how amazing Sanji was. A little teasing was definitely in order.

"Yes, Sanji is so extremely accommodating, you see." Law started, looking as if his words were directed at Luffy, when truthfully his gaze was subtly locked on a certain gym-junkie's reaction. "When I was in France, Sanji felt it unfair I had no one to converse with in my native tongue, I guess it's because he'd experienced the same thing here in Japan wasn't it, Sanji?" He took a second to look at the blond who stuttered out a nod in affirmation whilst Law continued. "It was just so nice you know; someone taking the effort to learn my language and pay enough attention to me to, you know, even be bothered with it." He could see the green machine burning in fury no doubt at his words but hopefully also at himself and his lack of care as well. Law wasn't going to let the man think he was all that when he had failed Sanji so badly. He had no qualms in throwing the man's own shortcomings in his face. The idiot had another thing coming if he thought he could just worm his way back into Sanji's life only to live the same ignorant lifestyle he had before. Done with spending energy on the meathead, he turned to look at Sanji letting all the sincerity he had. "I really appreciate that you still do this for me."

He was rewarded with a slight blush and a small smile as the chef used his trademark 'laugh off any praise' tactic. He let Sanji have it, not calling him out. He wanted Sanji to feel safe and if the man felt like he couldn't take the compliment in front of others, he wasn't going to push it now…perhaps later though…in private.

"So, Law." The chef started tucking the dishcloth into his apron. "Where will you be staying, um actually, how _long_ are you staying? Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

Preening at the fact he held all of the blond's attention, he couldn't help but gloat internally. "Well, I wanted it to be a surprise, _mi príncipe_." He smiled at the quick-fire blush that spread across the blond's face at the old embarrassing nickname. It left as soon as it came, but Law enjoyed the fact that for a second he had helped put it there. "You have no doubt had a hard time settling back in and I thought I could come and ease some tension for you." He paused a moment and laid his hand on top of the chefs that was resting on the counter. "I missed you, Sanji." He said in a softer voice his eyes locked onto those perfect blue pools.

Just as always, Sanji's eyes showed all his emotions. There was definitely some awkwardness and flattered feelings but Law could sense a melancholy sadness in their depths at the same time. It wasn't exactly what the mafia boss had expected, and he scolded himself silently for maybe adding too much drama into the chef's life. However, his self-reproach was quieted by the blond's next words.

" _I missed you too, Law._ " Sanji softly said while letting his fingers curl up to intertwine with Law's before gently detaching and sliding up to brush a lock of hair behind his ear. A signature Sanji move of having had enough attention directed at himself. The deep emotions welling within Law shouted at him to keep pursuing the shy chef, but the more reasonable side of him lightly reminded him to take his time and make Sanji's comfort his utmost priority. Taking a breath, he pasted on one of the fake smiles Sanji and he were so good at conjuring and spoke in a louder voice, address all present in the conversation.

"As for the length of my stay, I haven't decided that as of yet, you know how my _business_ can be Sanji." He directed the last part towards the chef with a meaningful nod. "I also have yet to procure accommodation…"

"Ah that's great!" Luffy exclaimed. "You can stay with me and Ace!"

* * *

Sanji breathed a sigh of relief when he finally clocked off from his morning shift. It was already twenty past two, twenty minutes late, but that was always a given with the morning shift, the change-over was always messy and more often than not, it wasn't as smooth as anyone hoped it would be. The one thing he was grateful for was the fact that Luffy had taken Law away to get settled and not long after, the marimo had also left.

Sanji wasn't stupid. He'd gotten carried away with Law's surprise presence for a while but felt Zoro's eyes boring into his back the whole time Law had been there and even more so in the time after. He knew Law had been using his flirting to fuck with Zoro. In all the times he'd spoken with the mafia guy about his ex, Law kept it no secret that he thought Sanji lucky to escaped such a toxic relationship when he had. It was always a sore point they could never fully agree on due to Sanji's traitorous heart, but he'd learnt lies of omission were his friends when Law got in _that_ mood. So, it was no wonder the broody brunette thought it a good idea to shake things up with his arrival. Despite the added pressure, Sanji couldn't hate Law for coming. He himself was surprised to find that paradoxically Law's presence both alarmed and calmed him. It was obvious that the Spaniard's arrival had ruffled Zoro as well and honestly, Sanji didn't know what to think of it. He hadn't even come to terms with all the shit Zoro had spouted at him at hanami and now he had his most recent fling –had it even been that?– come from Europe to throw another spanner in the works. Sanji sighed as he exhaled his smoke. He was too damn tired to be thinking of feelings.

He knew the swordsman wanted to talk; wanted to ask more questions about Law and all that the man's presence had brought up. Sanji just didn't want to deal with it. He just felt exhausted, emotionally and physically and he just didn't want to think. He didn't want to dwell on all the recent developments and figure out how they made him feel. He didn't want to reflect on what he actually wanted. Zeff kept harping on at him –okay, for once it wasn't harping– he was actually fucking concerned and showing it on his face with no judgement. But the point stood, even Zeff was telling him to _think_ and right now, it was the one thing Sanji didn't feel capable of doing. Especially after Zoro's confession at the park. He just couldn't handle the thought of hashing up the past and exposing all the carefully hidden broken bones yet to mend.

Another thing he had yet to process was the fact that Law was here, in _Japan_. He'd never pinned the guy as the type to ever leave Europe and now here he was in the orient. He had a vague idea of what it could mean, but again, he didn't want to think too deeply about it. The thing he had with Law was in the past… just like Zoro. He had more important things to focus on now. Namely, the safety and well-being of his son. Sanji shook his head as his fished in his pocket for his cigarettes. He had a few more moments to himself before he had to pick up Leo, and he really needed another smoke. He flicked his lighter and lit up barely calming down with the first hit of nicotine.

He had come back to Japan to escape the crazy shitstorm in Europe, why then did the universe decide to shit all over him here with all his stupid romantic problems. He had wanted a break and it was like everything around him was fucking with him to deny him even a small bout of relief...so he'd taken to hiding. He exhaled a puff of smoke, his nerves still rattled.

It wasn't by accident that after Law's arrival at the Baratie Sanji hadn't had as much time to hang around the breakfast bar like he had when Luffy and Zoro had first come in. It may be cowardly, but fuck, he wasn't ready to talk through this shit with Zoro, let alone Law. He wasn't ready to deal with any of this. It was too much too soon and honestly, he didn't even know where he stood with Zoro's latest confession, let alone how to react to the burning heat Zoro kept staring at him with today during breakfast. The terrifying thought that everyone expected him to have his shit together as an adult by now only served to make him feel even more incompetent. Sure, he was Leo's guardian, and he could be responsible for the little boy, but dealing with his own problems was fucking scary and it was petrifying to think of the disappointment of everyone if he just…couldn't.

Not for the first time since his return, Sanji realised he'd been spoilt in France. He'd had many people to rely on, to turn to and…surprisingly, none of them had had any judgment for him and his actions…or lack thereof. Now, back in Japan, he had a disturbing fact thrown back in his face.

He hadn't really grown up, had he?

A small cloud of smog had formed around him with his incessant need to fulfill his craving.

He still ran and hid from his problems instead of delving in and trying to sort through them no matter how hard it could be. And now, standing here leaning up against the back of the Baratie in the grimy alleyway Sanji was helpless to stop his thoughts form running away from him and freaking him out on a level he'd been too terrified to get near for the longest time. He lit up yet another cigarette. For once, the answer was clearly thrown in his face.

 _You're terrified to **really** realise that all along…it was **you** that fucked it all up._

 _You know that you're incapable of a proper relationship and yet you string these men along faking it just well enough that they are ready to do anything for you…then you can't contain it anymore and your true colours show…_

 _You're too needy…_

 _You're too desperate…_

 _You demand too much…_

 _…Attention…_

 _…Time…_

 _…Love…_

 _And you're not even capable of returning it…because you're too selfish._

 _…_

 _It's better for them if you leave them be…_

 _…_

His self-musings were interrupted when out of the corner of his eye he caught sight of a familiar mop of green hair. Shocked, he pushed off the wall on which he leaned and faced the man his heart racing, the unrealistic horrifying thought that Zoro could have somehow heard those deep dark deliberations, petrifying him. It was too close, too personal to be heard…

"What are you doing here?" As soon as the words left his mouth, he flinched inwardly at how accusatory they sounded. He compensated by flashing a weak tired smile. The green haired man shrugged looking a little out of place with nerves.

"Oh, just ended up here."

The nervous shift from foot to foot was not lost on the blond and his mind went into hyperdrive. There was only one reason the swordsman would be here and Sanji wanted no part in it. He was nowhere near ready for these deep heart to heart talks –he'd barely processed that Zoro had confessed to him at the park during hanami and had only just now come out of his own self-pity-party. Panic settled over him. His anxiety yelled at him to squash the panic and not show anything on his face.

"Ha, always getting lost." He tried to joke in an attempt to adjourn the discussion before anything could begin. His eyes flicked everywhere but Zoro's eyes. "It's a miracle you always seem to find your way here. Though I guess your nose and stomach work in tandem to find the best place to chow down, huh?" The swordsman barely paid the small jab any mind and Sanji floundered a little. His attempt to goad Zoro into a bickering match before he could subtly leave was not working. He could see that Zoro wanted to talk and Sanji was stalling as he thought of ways he could quickly escape this awkwardness despite the fact that he had just lit up another cigarette and it was obvious that he actually _did_ have some time to spare.

Zoro cleared his throat and raised his head to try and catch Sanji's eyes. "After hanami and..." The man took a deep breath, "all that happened today, I realised that maybe I haven't made myself clear..."

"Ummm...what are you talking about…?" Sanji mentally cringed at his immediate response. He should have diverted the conversation again before–

"I love you, Sanji. I've never stopped. I want to be a part of your life again; I want us to be together..."

 _That._

Something cold dropped into the pit of his stomach at the same time his heart pounded so fast it felt like all his extremities were on fire.

Sanji knew.

Deep down he had known. He had locked it away not wanting to hear it, feel it. Not wanting to have to deal with the dissidence it caused his fragile psyche when thinking about it. But hearing the words out loud, so clear and the meaning so undeniable, shook Sanji to his core.

He wasn't ready for this. For any of it.

He wasn't ready to forgive…

A soft huff left his lips as his fringe covered his eyes as he lowered his head. For some reason that irked and escaped him, his eyes had filled with tears and his confused mind couldn't process if they were born of happiness or sadness. All he knew was he hated them being there. He didn't want to be weak. He couldn't allow himself to be weak...especially in front of _him._ His mind told him this wasn't Zoro's fault… that he had to calm down before he did something he'd regret but his pounding heart wasn't on board with the idea.

"I don't think that's a good idea, Zoro." He said, forcing himself to keep an even voice.

"I know, I hurt you, Sanji but–" Zoro began stepping forward the movement petrifying Sanji as he quickly interrupted the man, his tone coming across tighter and more clipped than he would have preferred.

"Exactly, it wasn't good. We both ended up where we are for a reason. Don't make things more complicated than they have to be." He dropped his cigarette, grinding it into the discoloured concrete floor.

"Sanji," Zoro started once more, his voice soft, understanding, placating. "That's what I'm trying to say; it was horrible and it was my fault, I won't let it happen again. I want to make things right–"

The sweet words filled his head and part of Sanji thought it would be oh so easy to look up and into those golden orbs and melt. Just let Zoro take him away from all the pain, start again and just be together…but reality wasn't so kind.

He was broken.

And it seemed he had a nasty habit of inflicting pain on those he tried to love…so this had to stop.

"You think, I'll let you do that again…?"

The words were whispered, softly almost as if he hadn't really wanted the swordsman to hear them. _Had he actually?_ With Sanji's head bowed they weren't meant to be projected out loudly, but once they had been uttered, it was as if them being voiced gave him more strength to continue; as if all that was holding him back had snapped, releasing all his unchecked emotions.

All movement ceasing from Zoro told Sanji that they had been heard and not just uttered within his broken mind.

A broken "What?" was whispered in the same tone and Sanji forced himself to take a deep breath and ready himself for what he was about to do. He raised his head, sapphire looking straight into gold.

"You want me to let you have the chance to do that all again?" To his utter self-loathing and horror he felt his already wet eyes become even more so but he ploughed on, trying not to focus on the look of utter shock and hurt on his ex-lover's face. "You want me to open myself up to that all over again?! What makes you think I'd do that?! We didn't _work. W_ e _never_ worked. I was miserable by the end! How can you ask me this?!" There was a slight edge of hysteria in his voice and Sanji hated himself for how weak it made him sound he needed to cover it up before Zoro began placating him again and he would fall to pieces all over again.

"Sanji, I–"

"No!" The scream ripped from him and he found himself in the passenger seat of his own body as he continued to spout words, fear in the driver seat. "I don't want to hear it! I don't want to think it! Just…just leave me alone!"

Zoro's face was panicked now and Sanji felt something stab in his heart at the look of utter sadness and pain on the green haired man's face. He turned his face away only to gasp and look up once more when his ex stepped forward and tried to collect him in arms, pleading.

"Sanji, I know I hurt you, but–"

"Let _go_ of me!" He yelled, pushing away with all his might. To his utter shame, the tears he had held in now spilled over and ran down his cheeks. However, Zoro seemed to come to senses and realized he was distressing the blond and stepped back. "Stop! Just stop! Leave me alone! Why do you have to do this! I don't…I was just fine…why... _why_ did you have to come here? Why do you have to ruin _everything_?!"

Those last words rang out loud and clear in the back alley of the Baratie.

Sanji huffed for breath, staring at Zoro with a broken expression as he desperately tried to pull back into a semblance of control. Zoro stood, a meter away his face scrunched up in pain –the face he made when he was trying desperately not to cry– and Sanji had horrifying realisation it was him who had put that look there.

Zoro, who had only ever cried a handful of times was looking at him with _that_ face…with _that_ pain. The cook opened his mouth to apologise but shut it once more. His breathing was out of control, he was a mess and he didn't trust himself to speak anymore. He knew what he had just done, but the small amount of pride he clung to told him not to say anything. Told him not to ask for forgiveness.

Maybe it was better for Zoro like this.

He wasn't sure how much time passed since his horrible outburst but eventually Zoro's head bowed and his fist unclenched, his hands staying idly by his side.

"Sanji, I–" he took a breath, his voice shaky. "I'm sorry, for all that I did to hurt you four years ago and I'm sorry for coming 'round and bringing it all back up now." He swallowed and Sanji felt his pain with every breath and yet stood frozen to the spot leaning back against the grimy wall. "I won't come around you anymore." He spoke in a softer voice taking a deep breath. He raised his head and forced a smile on his beautiful tanned face making Sanji's heart squeeze in pain. "I want you to be happy, Sanji, that's all."

A few straggler tears slipped from ocean blue eyes and the bittersweet smile set on the swordsman's face made Sanji swallow thickly.

"I am sorry for everything."

With those last words he turned and exited the alleyway.

Sanji stood in the same position for a long while before eventually crumpling to a squat leaning against the alley wall. Tears spilled with abandon, he couldn't stop them and he couldn't help but feel like he'd not only hurt Zoro's heart, but destroyed his own in the process.

* * *

Uploaded 30th September 2019

Um, so…I'm sorry for the really big delay in uploads. I'd make a joke about it being _A Slow Process_ but that feels tacky. (´๑•_•๑) All _jokes_ aside, feel free to skip the note if you're not interested but here's my explanation.

.。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・°

The reason it took me so long to post this is that I had just written myself into a corner. You can see that this chapter dropped a lot of info and made more obvious 'hints' if you can call them that at this point へ‿(ツ)‿ㄏ…? and really, it sets up the next "segment" of the story…but to be real…I just wasn't in the mood to write this exposition for a long time. It's a lame reason, I'm sorry. There's no big grand outside factor that stopped me from writing other than every time I opened this document to continue writing, I took a look at what scenes I'd have to write and just felt completely uninspired. I want to clarify it's not that I was _bored_ with the story, but that I just couldn't get into the right mood to capture the feelings of all of the players. Law, Sanji and Zoro all have major emotional breaks (here and coming up) and I felt like all the drafts I wrote didn't capture the essence without being cheesy. That was my main problem. It felt like everything I wrote was just too fast paced and added to too much cheese for the mood of the script. It took me a good solid 6 months or so to figure out that _this_ was the reason for my lack of inspiration and then the rest of the time trying to correct and combat the cheesiness. So again, I am sorry.

I am truly thankful to all of you who reviewed and liked and followed me during this time. It was really receiving all your kind reviews that let the guilt finally win and forced me to knuckle down and get these chapters out. (More times than I care to admit…sorry) Also, reading other fanfics and doujinshi out there reminded me of how much I love this pairing and got me in the mood to try again (and again...and again...)

Like, I said before, I pretty much penned the whole notes of this fic waaaaaay before the first chapter was even posted, but to re-inspire myself I went through them all and expanded on them further making more detailed notes and specific plot lines. The clearer outlook I had on the whole _France situation_ made it easier to focus on writing this chapter and navigating where _exactly_ I want future ones to go. Sorry it took so long! ๑•́ㅿ•̀๑) ᔆᵒʳʳᵞ

 _Does this mean that the next chapter will be out soon?_

I cannot promise that. I'm sorry if you were expecting a different answer but I really don't want to give up on this fic because I rushed out a chapter that forever made me hate the direction the fic was heading. However, I am trying to push myself to be more accountable for setting aside time to write and focus on the fic in the way it deserves. So essentially, I cannot promise a time frame, but I am trying to be more on top of it!

Again, thank you for all the support – especially to those who bothered to review during my long impromptu hiatus and the ones who reviewed immediately after my posting the chapter. Reading [and re-reading] those reviews were the kick in the butt I needed to finally get started on this again.

Thank you all so much. ﾟ･:,｡ ＼(^-^ ) ありがと ( ^-^)/ ,｡･:･ﾟ

And again, sorry for the long wait. I really want to do my best to finish this story and I hope you all stay along for the ride.

Aoi Koneko Chan ( ˘ ³˘)❤

.。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・° .。.:*・°

yukino76: Thanks for the kind words! (っ´▽｀)っ

Siriana2526: Thanks for taking the time to review. I'm glad you enjoyed their father-son relationship. I love fics that show papa Zeff (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧ so I'm glad you like how I portrayed him!

Raigon: Sorry for the bad timing, but I'm glad you enjoyed it! I hope this chapter gave you a few more hints as to Sanji's backstory! ٩(๑•◡-๑)۶

Chel: Your words flattered me so much! I'm not kidding when I say this was definitely one of the reviews that guilted me the most into continuing .。.:*・° [not a bad thing at all!] *・° :.。I'm so glad you're back on the OP train! Glad to be igniting the fire once more like you did for me! (ﾉ^^)乂(^^ )ﾉ

Subaru's dreams: You're nowhere near as late as me so don't worry •(◐﹏◐)• Sorry about having the cliffhanger for so long. As for Sanji and stupid things…well, the man can sometimes forget the bigger picture but he's a smart boy! Glad you enjoyed it! (ɔ ˘⌣˘)˘⌣˘ c)

TrafalgarDCecil: I'm glad you're enjoying the fic! Thanks for leaving a review! (^_^)(^o^)

Curlybrow: First off, I am soooooo sorry I made you re-read it so much! Again, I have no real excuses! Thank you for expressing, with all the passion you felt, how much this chapter resonated with you. Your reviews were definitely some of the ones where the monster of guilt crawled upon my back and I'm grateful for that. Thank you for all your support, truly. (つ≧▽≦)つ⊂(・ヮ・⊂)

monsterpipi: I apologise for the cliff hanger… It wasn't meant to be like this, I swear! I'm glad you're enjoying this fic and as usual really love your predictions! ~(◠‿◕✿)

Jheni Kichiki: Yeaaaaaaah, sorry about the long unplanned silence on my part…but thanks for giving it a try and even more so for leaving a review. It really was one of those ones that shook me out and made me think _'Has it really been that long! Man that's shitty!'_ (｡ŏ﹏ŏ) So, I am sorry that you had to read all of it only to see that I'm lazy! [Been there, done that, it's not fun so I apologise!] I'm also very interested in the pairings you like. I hope you can enjoy this fic! ───==≡≡ΣΣ(っ´▽｀)っ

Also, thanks to lupcy, Novva, siberianRS, Jheni Kuchiki, shikakutenri, It'sASpectacle, CosmicBeauty, Tsuyoshi-chin, butyourgonnabehappyaboutit and FynnAdair, for favoriting this story! It means a lot to me :)


End file.
